If you haven’t read it yet, this post over at Sarah‘s is hysterical.
I laughed out loud.
Archives for October 2006
A Little Link Love
14 October 2006 by
The Look May Be New, But The Content Is Still Mediocre
13 October 2006 by
Last night, in an act of total bloggy spontanaiety, I found some illustrations I liked on istockphoto, downloaded them, and asked my hubby to work his Photoshop / Illustrator magic. He created my new banner while he was EATING A BOWL OF CHILI, so it’s a tender memory, the revamping of the blawg.
I also changed the color on the sides, and to do this I used the widely respected design method of looking at the previous color number on my template (it was 692), and then trying 100, 200, 300, 400, etc. and just seeing what I ended up with. I went through several variations of brown, then decided I’d try the number 450 (I’m telling you, it was a terribly methodical process), and what do you know? 450 was a nice forest green and exactly what I wanted.
Also, you may have stopped by last night when the sides of the blog were orange, and if so, I apologize. I hope you didn’t awaken your family with your cries of “MY EYES! MY EYES!”
The orange was a little, um, loud.
So if you’ll excuse me, I have to leave for an appointment with an insurance adjustor regarding The Unfortunate Deer Incident. It promises to be loads of fun with all the talk of bumpers and frames and grills…I’ll be sure to fill you in on all the Exciting Details when I return.
Happy Fall, everyone!
I Haven’t Even Told My Husband This Story Yet
12 October 2006 by
A few days ago Alex and I had to get out of the house in a hurry because some people were coming by with a realtor. I had been cleaning and scrubbing and vacuuming since about 7:30 that morning, so by the time we made our hasty exit at 11, I was a mess. My hair wasn’t fixed, I hadn’t taken a shower, I was wearing zero make-up, and I had on these gaucho-ish workout pants that are not attractive in the least but are as comfortable as all get out when you’re spending a morning up to your elbows in Pine Sol.
I didn’t have time to change clothes or, you know, bathe before we left, but I was so frazzled by that point that I really didn’t care. I figured I’d run through the McDonald’s drive-thru, grab some lunch, and then Alex and I would head to the park and commence with the killing of time. Plus, given the condition of my appearance, at least if we were at the park people might think that I’d been hoofing it on the walking trail just moments before I sat down at a picnic table to systematically demolish an order of McValue fries. And a cheeseburger.
As soon as we got to the park Alex noticed a lady who happens to work at his Mother’s Day Out, and all I could think was, “WELL, THAT FIGURES” because it never fails that I run into someone I know when I look my absolute worst. We made small talk for a few minutes, and in an attempt to explain why I looked like death warmed over, I offhandedly mentioned that oh, someone was looking at our house, we were in a hurry when we left as she could probably tell, ha ha ha ha ha, all the while hoping that she wouldn’t think I was some deranged mama who was unfamiliar with Why Good Hygiene Is Important.
In the meantime, a little girl who was probably one and a half kept running over to me, lifting up her arms, and trying to crawl into my lap. Alex was infinitely entertained by the fact that “the girl baby” wanted to play with his mama, and since the girl baby’s parents didn’t seem to object, I picked her up and let her play with the toy from Alex’s Happy Meal. She’d sit in my lap for a little bit, then jump down and run to her mama, then climb back in my lap, and so it went for about the next ten minutes.
When the little girl climbed down for about the twelfth time, I mentioned to her mama, who looked to be about my age, that I was flattered that her daughter seemed to like me so much.
And here is what her mama said to me:
“Well, you do look like her grandmother!”
OH YES SHE DID.
OH YES SHE DID.
I just sat there, stunned, trying not to feel offended, reminding myself that I’m not in fact getting any younger and that being a grandmother is one of life’s greatest blessings. Grandmothers are loving, they’re wise, they’re treasured – they’re the apples of their grandbabies’ eyes.
However, grandmothers are not, as a general rule, IN THEIR THIRTIES.
So in my head I tried to put a spin what she said, tried to remember that I didn’t exactly leave the house with a youthful glow that morning, tried to justify that maybe she meant the grandmother and I have a similar body type, or maybe the grandmother and I have a similar-sounding voice.
But at the same time, I couldn’t help but channel a little bit of Suzanne Sugarbaker and think, “Well, if I’d wanted to be insulted, I’d have stayed at home and waited for a crank call!”
And please don’t misunderstand. I have high hopes of being a Sassy Grandmama, as I know several of you are. But I’ve sort of envisioned my late 50’s / early 60’s as being the Sassy Grandmama years. Not, you know, NOW.
I mean, y’all. I can’t help but feel like I may need a touch of the Botox.
Perhaps the plastic surgeon will give me some form of senior citizens’ discount!
And just FYI: I’m considering changing the name of the blog to BooMamaw.
Consider yourself warned.
Interweb Goodness
12 October 2006 by
Today I’ve read a couple of thought-provoking posts on the topic of bravery.
Head over to Toddled Dredge and Antique Mommy – two of my very favorite blogs – to see what they have to say.
A List Is All I’ve Got To Give
11 October 2006 by
1. The “Project Runway” season finale is (not) tonight (I stand corrected – it’s next week), and my excitement knows no bounds. I guess that’s not saying a whole lot, because I’m a person who gets excited about, say, a new brand of salad dressing, so you’ll just have to trust me when I tell you that I regard tonight as a Television Event (even if it’s not the finale, it’s still an Event), and as such I made a celebratory pot of chili because if there’s one thing fashion designers love, it’s chili.
Okay. Maybe not.
But still.
2. Today’s “Oprah” segment about life in North Korea was shocking to me. Shocking. Good grief I live in a bubble.
3. I’m really behind on email again. If you’ve sent me a note in the last week or so and I haven’t answered you, please forgive me…but the house stuff and the work stuff and the all-Alex-all-the-time stuff have left me precious little time for the email stuff. I’m in the process of trying to catch up.
4. Last night? On “Dancing With The Stars”? How adorable was Emmitt Smith?
So adorable. BEYOND adorable, in fact.
I love him.
5. This afternoon when I picked up Alex from Mother’s Day Out (his very favorite place in the whole wide world with the exception of The Coke And Donut Palace, also known as my parents’ house), I got him all settled in the back seat and cranked the car.
We had just started out of the parking lot when he said, “Mama? I missed you!”
I’ll pause for a moment so that you can wipe away the tears. And then say, “Awwww.”
Seriously, I double dog dare you to try to be in a bad mood one little teensy bit when a three year old says those words to you.
It’s just not possible.
Hola Interpeeps
10 October 2006 by
I have tons to talk about – “The Bachelor” (I’m with Big Mama – the ABC folks hauled in a whole new level of crazy for this season), the realtor caravan, the fancy new Lifeway store where Alex and I hung out this morning while the realtors were here, and the unsurpassed customer service I received from our insurance company when dealing with the claim for the unfortunate deer incident (seriously – it was like I was checking into a fancy hotel or something).
But our internet has been down since about 10:30 this morning (no email! I know! and I didn’t even get the shakes!), and now my husband is home, and I really just want to hang out and watch “Dancing With The Stars” and make D watch a portion of “The Bachelor” where the girl who consumed too many adult beverages on the beach group date wakes up from her “nap” and tries to talk.
I never claimed to be highbrow, people.
Also, I want to start a new Bible study…I can’t jump in with anything at my church because of my schedule, so does anyone have a suggestion? I haven’t been in an intensive study since I did Living Beyond Yourself last spring, and I can feel it. Big time. I seem to be more consistent with Bible study when I’m doing something with daily “homework” – so let me know if you have any ideas.
Fascinating post, huh?
Please forgive. Family beckons.
Back tomorrow.
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