The other night on Twitter Kelly mentioned that she’d never tried chicken fried steak because she didn’t think she’d like it. But lo and behold, she finally tried it – and loved it.
HOWEVER.
She went on to confess that she doesn’t like grits, and all I could do was sit slack-jawed on my couch and try to make sense of it all. I mean, it’s fine that Kelly doesn’t like grits, but I have to say that her distaste for grits has forced me to re-evaluate the very foundation of our friendship. I’m certain that we can survive this grits-related revelation, but we may need to see a counselor or at the very least a life coach to move past it.
I’m totally kidding, of course.
But still – GRITS? WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE?
(And please realize that the watered-down, unsalted, cheese-less concoction that most restaurants try to pass off as grits hardly qualifies. Really good grits need a little chicken stock and salt and butter and cheddar cheese. Maybe even some cream cheese.)
Anyway, Kelly’s tweet got me thinking about the foods that I always feel like I’m supposed to like more than I do. I’m good on most of the traditional Southern stuff, but there are other American favorites that leave me a little on the “meh” side.
For example.
Cherry pie – Blech cherries yuck terrible awful cherries blech.
Coconut anything – The irony here is that I like to make coconut cake (my daddy LOVES coconut, so the coconut cake is almost always for him). However, I do not enjoy the coconut at all. Something about the texture gives me the heebie-jeebies.
Enchiladas – I’m not a huge fan of corn tortillas. And when you combine corn tortillas with a red sauce, you have a terribly underwhelming combination (in my very irrelevant opinion).
Spaghetti – I don’t get it. Noodles and tomato sauce / meat sauce. Leaves me underwhelmed.
Pizza – The homemade version seems like a whole lot of trouble for the end result – and the kind that you order always reminds me of college.
Any sort of Alfredo sauce – Rich and heavy and way too much.
Okay. So maybe what I’m establishing here is that I really don’t care for Italian food and then three other things.
All righty. What about you? What traditional food favorites make you think, “Hey. Does anybody have some crackers?”
I hope beyond all hope that nobody says fried chicken.
That just might turn my whole world upside down.
Hilarious! I’m so with you on the grits thing- I mean what in the world?! And kelly’s from the south! We live overseas and can’t get grits and they are always top on my list when someone asks us what they can bring!
Sadly, there is VERY little food that I don’t like… Maybe if there were it would help with losing the rest of my baby weight now that my 4th baby is 19 months!
Ah- thought of something (and yes, I’m from the south- Memphis even).
BBQ ribs…. The mess it makes is not worth the amount of food you get. Why not just get the pulled pork and enjoy it by the forkful without getting it all over your face and hands?
Also shrimp- the kind you have to peel and eat- don’t like the mess..
Clearly I have more of an issue with messy hands than with food itself…
TOTALLY agree with the meat on the bone. EWW!
And I agree with cherry pie. Bleh! My husband says I’m not American because I also DESPISE hot dogs and root beer. And also twinkies but I’m guessing I’m not alone on that. But really I hate anything with a “cream” filling.
Peanut Butter. Oh, I’ll eat a spoonful of peanut butter straight from the jar once a year just to see if my tastebuds have changed. But I can guarantee that I will NEVER like any form of peanut butter cookie, cake, or even a PB&J. Once you’ve added sugar to peanut butter = BLARGH!
olives! eeeeew.
onions. raw, steamed, cooked, sauteed…no thanks. they have a gross texture that is not improved by cooking.
i also do not like bell peppers. i have tried. i think they look pretty but i hate the taste!
tamales are nasty!
I’m late to this party, but that’s about explains my life, so we’ll go with it.
Oatmeal. OHEMGEE. I make it all the time for my kids (I must not love them), but I cannot stand it.
Flan. Pronounce it FLON like CON or FLAN like PAN. I don’t care. Sounds gross, looks gross, tastes much worse.
Baked Beans. This greatly displeases my husband. He’s won blue ribbons for his baked beans which contain 3 or 4 kinds of beans (barf) and I just can’t handle it. He cooks it in the crockpot and I shudder every time I walk through the kitchen. Smells like simmering garbage and then it tastes like luke-warm garbage and then you smell it hours later as a mutated form of garbagey gas. WHY?!
Canned asparagus. My MIL thinks this is a vegetable, blessherheart. Fresh? Every day of the week, but canned? Check, please!
Macaroni Salad. It’s not the mayo. I like mayo. I just can’t get into pasta smothered in mayo. Gross.
Lima beans. Do people really eat these and say “My, I’m GLAD I ate that!” I hope not. I have very vivid memories of being the last one sitting at the dinner table with tears running down my face and pile of lima beans on my plate with nary a mashed potato to hide them in. I resorted to swallowing them like pills.
Fruit on meat. I like my meat to be meat and my fruit to be fruit. Please don’t let them meet in the middle. Pineapple on ham and cherries on pork and what have you. Oy.
Chicken Spaghetti. VOMIT
Jello salad. Did you know some people put chopped up apples and CELERY in there? Drunk people should not invent recipes.
Okay, I just read more comments and have decided I’m much more picky than I originally thought. So, here’s my second edition.
Cantaloupe. I’ve tried and I’ve tried.
Papaya. Give me a guava. Give me a kiwi. Anything – just not a fruit that smells and tastes like stinky feet.
Pumpkin Pie. Smells wonderful. Tastes awful. And it jiggles weird.
Coffee. That is, unless it is equal parts heavy cream and sugar with a splash of coffee and ice.
Tuna Noodle Casserole. *gulp* I can’t.
Raw onions.
PB&J sandwiches
Boxed Mac & Cheese
Bologna, spam and hotdogs. They’re all the same thing anyway.
“Philly” cheesesteaks served more than 10 miles from PHILLY! Goodness, America. Please don’t try to serve something that doesn’t even remotely resemble the real thing and then label it as the real thing. *stepping off of soapbox*
Omigosh, I laughed out loud at your two posts! You need to write a blog, sista! I’d be one of your loyal readers!!! Thx for the laughs!
I’m going out on a food related limb here and announcing something that recently made my fiancee look at me like I was from Mars.
I don’t like bacon.
It’s either too dry and crispy or too greasy & soggy and why is it on my sandwich adding calories when I flat out do not like the flavor.
So there you have it, I am that girl who orders a delicious meal and adds “but without bacon” to the end of the order. More than one server has walked away shaking his head.
I have a problem with peach cobbler, it smells like feet & I just can’t put that in my mouth. I also cannot stand hush puppies, have never liked them but decided I would try again a couple of years ago…it was not a good scene, had to spit it into my napkin. Fish sticks have been on my bad list since the 2nd grade, along with tartar sauce (pickle relish & mayo?! REALLY) and 1,000 Island Dressing aka Doggy Burp (pickle relish, mayo, & catsup…shudder). I also dislike the texture of coconut, it is like tree bark & I feel like it grows as I chew. Jello salads & congealed salads (they’re NOT salads!) also make my nasty food list.
Good golly this is funny…
Meat with any tinge of pink. If I can see pink it goes back on the grill. It used to be that pork had to be done…now it is en vogue to serve it all fleshy-like. That used to cause worms, people!!! And those little veiny things in the meat…what is that, veins?! EGADS! Any type of connective tissue or tendon like structure within the meat is enough to send me flying to the latrine. And that brown-stained meat that is right next to the bone. Holy. Moly. Get it away.
The other biggie for me is raw seafood. Really?! I was onced forced by my MIL to slurp a raw oyster. She actually held it up to my face and shoved it to my mouth. I almost punched her, but that may have ruined the fun time everyone was having with the oysters except me. It was like a giant cold loogie going down my throat. I will never do that, not ever in my life, again.
I do not love cherry anything. Mushrooms look and taste like old rubber tires. Olives are just weird. Bologna is spelled wrong and is beyond disgusting. Apple pie? Not happening. Raisins are a waste of perfectly good grapes. Green bean casserole is slimy and gross. Tamales are mushy and strange. Applesauce has a sand papery texture that should not be eaten. And yet? I cook or buy all of these things for my family except bologna, because a girl has to draw the line somewhere.
Good news for you- you don’t like AMERICAN Italian food! I live in Italy and spaghetti? It is just a pasta- you can add so many things to it (not just tomato/ beef sauce)! And all my Italian friends ask me why Americans eat cheese/ garlic bread with Italian food- it is not something they do here! And I asked one friend here if she like Alfredo sauce… her reply? “What is alfredo sauce?” Another made-up American Italian thing!
Capers…like tiny mouse terds. Ewww.
Oh and alfredo…bc my dog had a bad case of worms when I was little and she threw up what looked like a bowl of alfredo and noodles. Neither my sister or I can go near that stuff. Gah! I just gagged thinking about it
I can’t eat grapes, its the skin on my teeth… Shivers down the spine. However, I ONLY eat the grape skittles (I mailed them once and tried to buy just grape.. No suck luck, I love grape bubblegum, suckers, slushes.. Basically anything grape flavored.
I can’t do anything like oatmeal, grits, tapioca pudding, cream of wheat., yuck yuck yuck!
Hamburger meat is also on my no no list.
Reading all this made me realize why I’m fat: I like too many foods. The only things I won’t touch with a ten foot pole are english peas (boogers) and green beans. Oh, and beets. Practically every other food on the planet (well, in the southeast, including all the imports of chinese, mexican, etc) I love.
Do you remember the grits at the breakfast buffet in Charlotte? Now recall the rest of the food was, well, you know, we escaped to the food court but those grits – I still dream about those grits.
I feel the exact same way about coconut as you do… the texture is the killer of that little food. I once spit out german chocolate cake at a Howard Johnsons restaurant all over the table, my parents were experimenting. Ha! But, I will drink things with coconut flavor, like a pina colada or mai tai, go figure!
I must be the wierd one because there’s not much I don’t like….I love food…all of it.
Only exceptions are jello, oatmeal (I have tried and tried but can’t get past the consistency), liver (of course, who really likes liver?) vienna sausages in the can (gagged just typing it) and any kind of “potted” or “deviled” meat.
No cooked broccoli anything! I totally agree with you on enchiladas- burritos are so much better! Most fruit pie is meh to me except pumpkin which I love.
The problem with coconut is that it has the texture of toenails. Yuck. I don’t like spaghetti or Alfredo either. Gravy is a no go, so I’d say I don’t like sauces; however, I LOVE cheesy sauces. The worst for me, though, (besides coconut-toenails) is starchy veggies like green peas, corn, and mashed potatoes (unless the potatoes are FULLY loaded). And, those are everyone’s staple side items.
Lima beans, refried beans, peas…it’s a texture issue…
Okay, so I know this post was written before the horrific tragedy in Connecticut & I should probably still be contemplating heavy things like darkness and mental illness and reaching out to the lost in our fallen world, but I think I need a quick thinking break…
I’m so weird about food, it’s embarrassing! I’m with you 100% on the coconut, enchiladas, cherry pie, spaghetti, and pizza (I think my husband’s time as a youth minister pushed me over the line on that one). Also, chocolate ice cream, Oreos, chocolate cake, and chocolate pudding all gross me out but I love chocolate candy bars. And olives, eggs, tomatoes, bell peppers, and especially onions are disgusting. Mangos taste like dirt to me. I LOVE fried chicken but can NOT get close to any bones & heaven help us if I happen across some type of anatomy (I.e. a vein or piece of fat!). I’m totally on board with pretending that all meat just magically appears in the grocery store.
I don’t eat any red meat – prime rib is disgusting to even look at. I also detest pork – the other grey meat. Blech.
Hate olives, lima beans and will not try oysters, sushi. I do NOT like mayo. Goulash, chop suey (WORSE from a can!!!), stuffed peppers or stuffed cabbage. I could however eat Cherry Pie, Coconut, Enchiladas (although maybe mine are called some form of burrito because I use flour tortillas) and Pizza (bbq’d is so good!). Could do without Spaghetti and Alfredo sauce is too rich for me.
Confession moment – I didn’t eat my first slice of pizza until I was pregnant with my first child. Somehow got it in my mind that I didn’t like pizza and never tried it. Nothing like an overload of cravings to make you change your mind :)
This is my first time visiting your blog, how I missed such a gem I will never know… However, now that I am here, I had to throw my 2 cents into the ring. The comments alone are priceless! (as I sit here reading and laughing inwardly so as not to wake anyone) As I read through every comment I noticed that I do not seem to like much in the way of food.
Seafood (born and bred Southern), no matter how you cook it, I find it just nasty.
Jello and/or Pudding – Just to see either makes me gag.
Cooked fruit of any kind… I don’t get it and I won’t eat it.
Edges of food… Yes, I cut the edges off of everything and will take food from the center of a pan, just so I don’t have any “edges.”
Soup… Makes my skin crawl.
Food that stinks… If it smells up a place, I won’t eat it. (ie: greens, cabbage, fish, etc…)
I have an aversion to food that is “wet,” waffles/pancakes/french toast w/syrup, butter on my food, gravy (gag), oatmeal, cereal.
White milk… My family members could own a cow with the amount of milk they consume and I can’t choke down half a glass.
I am sure there are plenty more :)
I hate guacamole! I’ve tried it over and over and I just cannot do it!
I also don’t like cherry pie. Give me chocolate any day!!
I don’t like mayo. I’m fine with it in things, like tuna or potato salad but on a sandwich?! NO ma’am! I hate the smell, I hate the way it sounds in the jar, and more importantly I cannot stand to get it on my hands. The squeeze bottle was created just for me.
I do love spaghetti, though! You should try it with some ranch dressing next time. Takes it to a whole new level!!