Let’s say, for instance, that I moved into a house that was, oh, approximately 33 years old.

And let’s say, for instance, that before I moved in said house, every single wall throughout the home had clearly been painted by a professional who took great pride in his or her craft.

But let’s just say, for instance, that the colors on said professionally painted walls were not really my favorites, that I would have preferred shades that were, oh, more neutral. Less jewel-toned.

Purely hypothetical, of course.

So let’s say – JUST AS AN EXAMPLE, NOT THAT THIS EVER HAPPENED – that I lived in that house about a year, never really giving much thought to the walls, maybe occassionally wondering what colors I would use on the off chance that I ever decided to paint the walls myself, but quickly dismissing those thoughts because THE WALLS, THEY ARE FINE, AND THEY HAVE BEEN PROFESSIONALLY PAINTED.

But then one day in this COMPLETELY PRETEND SCENARIO, let’s just say that I started to paint, oh, I don’t know, a guest bedroom.

And let’s just say that despite the fact that painting was a HUGE HEAPING PILE OF TROUBLE, the room was so transformed by the application of A COLOR I ACTUALLY LIKE that I could not stop walking in the room two or sixty seven times a day to admire the makeover.

And that I maybe perhaps just might want to paint EVERY SINGLE ROOM IN MY HOUSE NOW.

Preferably by Thursday.

Let’s just say.

So if the above scenario were in fact true, that would mean that I’ve managed to live in the thirty-three year old house for almost a year without being very bothered by the paint colors, but now – now that I’ve actually painted a room – OH MY WORD I CANNOT STOP WITH THE PAINTING, and not only that, I CANNOT REST UNTIL ALL THE PAINTING IS DONE.

I mean, that’s how I would feel if anything even remotely close to these events had ever happened in my life.

But clearly I wouldn’t know anything about any of that.

Over the last few weeks I’ve received a couple of great children’s books, and I’m giving away copies of both of them this week.

ISN’T THAT FUN?

I do love me some great children’s books.

The first book I’m giving away is called Phooey, written and illustrated by Marc Rosenthal. This book is filled with wonderful, eclectic illustrations that manage to be fanciful and nostalgic and current all at the same time. In fact, I’ve even thought that I would love to frame some of the illustrations and use them in a nursery if I ever have another baby.

Despite the fact that I’m starting to give Sarah a run for her money.

Oh, I kid because I’m old.

Anyway.

What Alex loves about this book is that reading it requires his daddy to make all sorts of sound effects, and I don’t know if y’all know this, but four year-old little boys are slightly entertained by funny noises. In fact, funny noises rank only slightly below ice cream on the four year-old little boy list of BEST THINGS EVER, and yes, that observation is based on years and years of arduous research conducted in laboratories and hospitals and Other Places Where Smart People Decide Things.

You can’t argue with science, people.

And seriously? If you could hear how Alex giggles when his daddy reads him this book? You would run out and buy yourself a copy rightthissecond.

I have three copies to give away, and if you’d like a chance to win one of them, all you have to do is leave a comment on this post. I’ll close comments on Friday, November 23 and then use my BFF Random.org to select the winners.

And whatever you do, do not click here. Because you will start to play and then one of your kids will want to play and GOOD LUCK, SISTER, at tearing the two of you away from the computer.

Not that I’d know anything about that, of course.

Before you look at these pictures, you should know that when I paint I just jump right in.

Which is why you see an end table on the bed.

Because I had to put it somewhere, and moving it to another room would have disrupted the creative process.

Same for, you know, the beach towel.

Hideous Blue

Hateful Primer

Soothing Yellowish-Taupe Color

I need to go over the area next to the ceiling ONE MORE TIME, and then I’ll start putting the room back together.

With end tables ON THE FLOOR and everything.

I’ll post some more pics whenever I get everything dekky-rated.

And p.s. – I have never looked worse than I do right this second.

Thank you.

Whoo Pig Sooie blah blah blah.

And if losing the game weren’t enough, for some reason I decided to paint our guest room today, not that I don’t have FOUR HUNDRED OTHER THINGS I need to be doing, but we’re getting bunk beds for Alex’s room and it’s creating a domino effect in that we’ll be moving the bed he has now into the room across the hall – the one that D has been using as an office – and so we’re moving D’s office into the den area at the end of our bedroom, and the former office / soon-to-be guest room will have to be painted, so I thought I’d go ahead and paint Alex’s room while I was at it, but somehow I ended up painting the current guest room instead of the other two rooms that I was planning to paint because I guess I was sick of the blue walls not to mention that I’m crazy.

But the blue is hideous, for what it’s worth.

So this morning I decided YES, TODAY I WILL PAINT, because we’ve lived here almost a year now and I have wanted to paint the guest room the whole entire time but just haven’t done it because I would rather sit on the couch and watch DVR’d episodes of House Hunters while reading blogs and eating peanut butter and drinking diet Coke.

I am very refined.

Anyway, I had to put primer on the walls first because the blue is so dark, and I thought the priming process would be super quick, but for some reason painting renders me completely incapable of approximating time. I always start off thinking, “Oh, it’ll take me 30 minutes to tape the room and an hour to paint, so really, I should be completely finished within two hours,” only I forget the part about how it takes more like two hours to tape and SLIGHTLY LONGER THAN FOREVER to get paint on the walls.

And so what was going to take me two hours, TOPS, has now taken more like six, and I have been in the guest room ALL NIGHT LONG and have only gotten the primer done.

Which means I’ll get to paint the walls tomorrow! I am so fake excited!

So that is why I’m telling the internets that I’m painting – because I’m hoping that you will come back here tomorrow or Monday and be all, Hey, where are the pictures, we want to see the room you painted, and I need that kind of accountability because what I want to do more than anything right now is to shut the door to the guest room and pretend it doesn’t exist and go sit on the couch with the aforementioned House Hunters, blogs, peanut butter and diet Coke.

You are welcome to join me.