Okay – so it’s not really a big secret that I am not a huge romantic. I am probably the least romantic girl I know, in fact. I don’t care about sweeping romantic gestures – your flowers, your chocolates, your jewelry. I especially don’t care for jewelry – I would much rather David sock that money away so that we can go on a big trip for our tenth anniversary (side note: one time I mentioned this to Mama, who said, “You’d rather take a trip than have another diamond?” I said, “Oh, yeah – any day.” And she replied, “Well, you’re crazy.”)
My point is that I tend to let holidays like, say, Valentine’s come and go with only a card as a token of my love and affection. If I’m really going all out, I’ll get David a CD or something (another side note: my sister, on the other hand, never misses a single holiday…this morning we were greeted by a Large Box of Goodies filled with all manner of age-appropriate toys for Alex as well as candy and a book for his mama).
When I woke up today I did process the fact that it was Valentine’s Day, and while I considered picking up happies for my husband, I ultimately thought, “You know, I bet David will kind of appreciate it if I don’t cave in to the commercialism of this manufactured holiday – I am not going to buy anything.” To me, at least at 6:30 this morning, this was an excellent idea – one of my better ones, in fact. I mean, what husband wouldn’t want for his wife to abandon all romantic expectations? That’s a good thing, right?
I was surprised to find a sweet email from D. in my inbox about an hour later, and I honestly thought it was a great V-Day token in and of itself. I was actually impressed that he remembered the day at all, as he has been very vocal in the past about his dislike for what he calls “Valentinian paraphernalia.” I sent him a sweet email in return, and in my mind, we were all done with the Valentine’s festivities. We’d expressed some lovely sentiments, end of story.
Did I mention that I’m not at all romantic?
Imagine my surprise this afternoon when I found a gift WITH A CARD (that’s even a bigger deal when D. is doing the giving) on the dining room table. He had picked out a new cookbook (I can read a cookbook like a novel, no kidding) AND a copy of Paula Deen’s new magazine. Nothing extravagant, mind you – but really thoughtful gifts that will be used and enjoyed by me for many years to come.
And do you know what I had to give my husband?
That would be JACK. And SQUAT.
He wasn’t upset at all. He was a little surprised – but not upset. I mean, I do usually give AT LEAST a card, but this year I didn’t even have that unless you count the cards that Alex got yesterday at Mother’s Day Out, and somehow I’m thinking that small animated greetings from Matthew and Avery and Claire and Charlie probably won’t mean too much to David.
So I am about to rectify this situation. I’m gonna make a big ole country supper – meatballs and gravy, egg noodles, butterbeans, biscuits, brownies and ice cream. And Alex and I are about to create the card of all cards. It’s going to be big and it’s going to be colorful and it’s going to be romantic. But somehow when I think about romantic cards I picture people feeding each other chocolate-covered strawberries while they hold hands in a field of dandelions as they sing love songs from the 70’s.
And that’s not really us.
So I think I’ll go for funny. Funny is most definitely us.
Off to redeem myself.
By the way, Happy Valentine’s Day, BooDaddy!
Even if I’m terrible at romantical gestures (and it’s very important to say “romantical,” as it isn’t really a word at all), I love you very much.
Well, you have two immediate opportunities to redeem yourself…Presidents’ Day is next Monday and Flag Day is next Friday – not to mention the array of holidays in March. :)
And, as we know, Mama has colored me crazy many, many times. Plane ticket+hotel accomodations=Happy Sister 8) 8) 8)
Okay, there is still time to redeem yourself with THE COMPUTER HAS LOST ALL CONTROL AGAIN – IT’S RANDOMLY EDITING COMMENTS!!!!
(OH MY WORD Laura Miller have you forgotten that MY DADDY reads this blog?!?!?!?)
:-)
Edited By Siteowner
Okay, I did NOT, in fact, realize that The Reverend read your blog. I do apologize! :-)
My romantic gesture for Paul was:
1. Reef flops with built in beer bottle opener
2. Accompanied by said 12 pack of bottled BUDLITES
3. Large I LOVE YOU balloon tied to it along with a funny VD card. I’m not exactly “romantic” myself sista!
Elise, I believe you outdid yourself last year. And that’s all I’ll say about that.
And Lou, I think the whole situation is VERY funny – your daddy would say, “Well, DO TELL the Reverend, Lou. DO TELL.” :-)
I defy anyone to top the romantic Valentine’s trifecta of 1) a pair of $5.99 boxers from Walgreens, 2) a mega-sized Kit Kat bar and 3) confirmation that I wouldn’t go totally ballistic over the purchase of new golf shoes. I rest my case.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner.
:-)
One moment please…all the results are not in. I got my husband… NOTHING for V-day. And I mean nothing. No card, no special dinner, no candy, NOTHING. I’m sure I’ll win wife of the year award at the 20 year class reunion this summer. I did go to the store last night to look for cards, but seriously, there were NONE left!!! I asked him if he wanted a special dinner and he said no – he ate too much at lunch. So, there you go. A few years ago, I would have been really disappointed that I did not live up to society’s expectations of this stupid holiday, but now I’m fine. Or maybe I’m just tired. Anyway, I beat Daphne – so there.
Hey,
I got my lover nothing, either. I even had him go to KFC and get supper for all of us, lol. He is taking me out to eat Thursday, soonest we could coordinate our “hectic” schedules, but he says I feed him good meals all the rest of the time, so supper was on him tonight. I didn’t have to cook, and that’s a gift right there, for me. I’ll show him my appreciation for my gifts in the proper, Christian wifely way, though……I will pick up his dirty clothes out of the floor and wash them for him and place them in the magic chest-of-drawers that dispenses clean, folded clothing on a regular schedule….. :)
Ever mindful of the “Holiday Theme”, I cooked up a delicious, color coordinated VD supper consisting of:
Red jello artfully displayed over white cottage cheese.
THE END. :)
In this corner, one-time, Cham-peen of the Wuhld……Socially correct, Valentine’s Day hostess, I give youuuuu….
Sis-tuhhhhhhhhhh………rofl…. :)
Okay, I feel the need to enter into the competition. :-) Jody and I are usually NOT partakers of the V Day commercialism; however, somehow this year, we felt lovey-dovey. The result was that I made him a red velvet cake (which is is favorite)FROM SCRATCH and got him a gift certificate to Aqua Day Spa for a massage (which he’s never had). He got me the CUTEST silk pj’s and some truffles. Also– he wrote the sweetest message in my card– which was really the best part. Again, this is NOT the norm for us, but I found the tokens of affection to be a delightful treat in the midst of winter doldrums. I won’t go into the other “treats” since the “computer” edited my last comments on that matter. :-)
That is sweet. I guess you and Jody win for, you know, “thoughtfulness” and “romance.” :-) It’s tough to top Sister’s red jello and cottage cheese, though. That takes the (homemade red velvet) cake.
COME ON YA’LL IT IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE HOLIDAYS. I JUST LOVE ALL OF THE COLORS. IT MAKES ME HAPPY. I BROKE DOWN AND GOT THE FLIP FLOPS TOO WITH THE BOTTLE OPENER. HE LOVES THEM!!!
But T, a key ingredient in your love for the holiday is that you are a ROMANTIC. You love to be wined and dined and danced and wooed. So it’s a perfect match, you and Valentine’s.
But me and Valentine’s? Eh, not so much. :-)
Didn’t give nothing. Didn’t get nothing. But I was really ok with it.I told T not to get me anything. (To me, it’s like New Year’s Eve — one of those days that you feel pressure to be romantic or festive. So, we boycotted the whole thing.)Anyway, about 5 yesterday, he said, “Are you really ok with me not getting you something, or are you just saying that and then you’ll get mad tomorrow?” And you say we’re not romantic?
Liz – That comment made my day, especially the two intentional double-negative usages.
I’m glad you realized those double-negative usages were intentional. It’s hard for me to write that even for effect!