Because I’m a list-maker, I’m also a person who typically stays caught up on errands. I try to get to one or two places a day, and doing that over the course of a week means that I rarely find myself out of anything. I would go so far to say that I even ANTICIPATE being out of something like baby wash or shampoo or dishwasher detergent four or five days away from actual “outage,” so we’re usually pretty well-stocked with the daily necessities.
But this last month? Eh. Not so much.
So today I found myself with a mighty big to-do list – stuff that couldn’t wait one more day. We enjoy having things like, you know, coffee filters and soap to make our life easier, and I also enjoy an up-to-date cosmetics supply so that I don’t scare small children. Because wearing make-up is, for me, more of a public service than anything else.
With our list in hand, A. and I left the house this morning, and our first stop on the Tour of Errands was Family Christian. While I was picking out what I needed, A. was making a point to sort through every single Veggie Tales DVD in the history of all time ever, and he became SO consumed with his video sorting that he neglected to heed nature’s call and as a result tee tee’d all over himself while standing on a small chair he had pulled over to the movie shelves.
I was prepared, however – I was armed with an extra pair of underwear and shorts – but A. had to change clothes in Family Christian’s restroom. All I can say about that experience is that I do not feel that Jesus would be pleased with the cleanliness and / or orderliness of their women’s facilities. Oh I can’t even type about it anymore because, well, EWWWWWW.
Next stop: we went to Jason’s Deli to meet my friend NK and her children for lunch. It was fairly uneventful unless you consider that A. tried to swat away anyone who even made eye contact with me and that you don’t really get to talk to a grown-up much when there are two three year olds and a six month old at the table. What you DO get to do is FETCH lots of things – lids for drinks, straws, napkins, ice cream, muffins, dropped bottles, etc.
So I guess instead of saying that I met NK for lunch, I should actually say that we met to fetch some stuff. It’s what all the cool mamas are doing these days.
And then, the mall.
Trips to the mall always make me feel like we’re The Clampetts Come To Town, because A.’s reaction to escalators is similar in scope of emotion and duration of enthusiasm to Jethro in “The Beverly Hillbillies” when he first spies his brand new CE-ment pond. A. reacts normally as we go up the escalator, but as soon as he “disembarks,” he starts to jump and then SCREAMS (I don’t mean “says” – I mean “screams”), “HEY! EVERYBODY! WE DID IT! WE DID IT! ALL RIGHT! GOOD JOB!”
I guess I should be grateful that he doesn’t say “WOO, DOGGIE! THEM THAR METAL STAIRS GOT A MOTOR IN ‘EM, MOMMA!”
So when we got off of the escalator in front of Macy’s (I had to go. free gift time at the Lancome counter. you understand.), A. started proclaiming his escalatory accomplishments (one good thing about having your own blog? you get to make up words like “escalatory”) to everyone around us, and while they were very polite and they smiled and they nodded, I wanted to explain that I did not in fact hook the boy up to a Mountain Dew and coffee IV earlier in the day, and we have in fact ventured into public several – lo, many – times in his life.
I won’t even go into the part where he climbed up shelves stocked with make-up while I was paying for my purchases and then fell and cut his knee and created an entirely different sort of scene.
So finally, Walmart.
And you’re thinking, “A bookstore and a restaurant and a mall and a Walmart? All in the same day? WOMAN? ARE YOU INSANE?”
To which I answer: why yes! I am! Nice to meet you!
It really wasn’t so bad, because at that point A. was so tired that he sort of lazily chewed on a donut and whined, but I was in their restrooms twice, and while they are much, much nicer than Family Christian’s, someone really needs to get down at a three year old’s eye-level and check out the toilets when they’re cleaning. Because, well, EWWWWWW.
And just for the record? The temperature in the Walmart parking lot this afternoon? 492 degrees. An egg would have fried before it ever made contact with the pavement. And when it did make contact with the pavement, it would have exploded into a fiery mass of protein. With smoke.
But you know what? All in all? It was oddly fun. Really.
So what did you do today? :-)
Well, since you ask ….
hmmmm.
In retrospect- I think your day was much more, uh, eventful, than mine.
Yeha- that’s it!
Thanks- what a pal. I feel so much better about everything now :)
Woo doggie! Woman, them thar shenanigans is downright funny. I nearly busted a gut laughing.
Somethin’s up with your blog. I clicked on the title for this post from Bloglines so I was able to get to it, but it’s not showing up on your homepage. And this happened to me this morning too.
Oh, and this was hilarious as usual.
I’m pretty sure I could match some of these stories – just change a few of the names around. The best for me was A.’s comment off the escalator. Don’t we just love our boys! :)
I went NOWHERE today. It was glorious. Had some old friends over. There were 11 kids between the four of us. Of course my house is trashed, which is always a sign of a great time had by all.
Oh my, now that is a funny tale. I could actually picture an egg exploding on the pavement!
My day wasn’t as eventful. We took my little guy to the Pool and got to stay 30 minutes before the big meltdown. But it was still fun!
I rode the Senior Citizen’s van to Jonesboro to the Super Walmart. That would be the Sr. Citizen’s van with a crippled air conditioner. Think Spam can on wheels, 6 blue-haired ladies, me and the younger driver, almost NO air circulating. I took a shower right before I got on the van and I was wetter when I got off the van than I was when I stepped out of the shower. Eeee-yewwwww!!
Add to that the fact that my commode started leaking last night and I used most of the towels in my linen closet trying to keep Noah’s flood from reaching the living room before the landlord got here this morning to fix it, and it makes for a fantabulous day. Colored or white, those towels will be bleached to a turn.
AND I feel like death warmed over. I think I got a tad too hot on the van. Yuck. My turnip greens, pork steak and macaroni and cheese didn’t even tempt me to eat too much, and it’s not setting too good, either. Other than that, I’ve had a dandy day, thanks for asking. ;-)
Thanks, sister. I’m so glad you asked. :)
Well, I worked, ’cause ya know, that’s what I do…but, I also laughed a lot today. Our cousins, J&K, came by my office and brought “E., The Super Baby”…and that was my afternoon entertainment! P.S. Were your ears burning?
xo,
Oh what a fun day. We actually have Reed’s best friends over for a sleepover — 5 total. Five 8 year olds that have been taken to the movie “Barnyard” ( so not good for adults), then CiCi’s pizza, then home on the Banzai slide, now all tucked in sleeping bags watching a movie. Must confess, it is his very very late birthday party — b’day was in May. Oops@!!! I just thank God that he has given Reed such wonderful friends.
You are one funny lady. I have felt like that many a time, but never thought to think of it “Clampett” terms. Hilarious.
I’m not sure who had the better day, you or Diane. :-)
My day? Changed two absolutely-the-most-disgusting diapers and spent literally hours chasing a little thirteen month old baby around in circles all over my house, saying boogity boogity just for the sheer delight of hearing him squeal and do his little Frankenstein walk to keep Nana from catching him. I’m completely exhausted. But…my bathroom visits were a lot nicer than yours.
Are you sure you want to ask?
Okay.
I juggled a preschooler, toddler, and newborn all morning while attempting to take a shower. Then I left all of the above children with my mother and fled to an appointment. Where someone made me cry. Then I came home, fighting traffic, a train, and the grocery store, only to arrive to a screaming infant and two little boys who fought over the sprinkler until one of them cried, all the while spraying the INSIDE of my house, the dog, and me.
Fun day, as always. Thanks for asking:)
I go to Wal-Mart at 8 in the morning since my Bible study meets at 6:30 am! It is a summer thing and that was the best time for everyone who has childern at home. But anyway-I love Wal-Mart at that time b/c no one is there. Just me and the litte old door greeter man,that seems to work EVERY day! He is retired but he still works that much…hmmm? Retired, I think not! But he is ALWAYS wearing a smile!!
But today I played Bunko with the chicks! It was my first time EVER and I happened to enjoy it greatly!
Have a happy Friday
Well, since you asked… I took my babies to:
The hardware store. That was pretty uneventful… except for the part where the resident kitten (yes, in the hardware store) came running after Bethany, who proceded to SCREAM, try to run away, get herself caught up in the display of cabinet hardware, and flail around (with one arm caught up in said display) until I picked her up. (And she refused to be put down again… a lot of good her learning how to walk is doing me!)
The Discount Store. That was also uneventful… except for the part where Lainee decided she needed to push her doll through the store in its stroller, and Jonathan started screaming because she would not give him a turn, so the clerk told me I should buy one for him, adding “we’ve got some Barbie strollers over in the other aisle.” To which I replied, “be quiet.” (I am not kidding. I said that.)
And the grocery store… which was just full of arguments about wanting CHICKEN NOODLE soup (I bought cream of chicken) and when-is-it-my-turn-to-get-something-off-the-shelf. Thankfully, we only needed three items…
Aren’t you glad you asked?
Me too…
Well sense you asked, having a 3 year old really in rerospect is not all that different than a 15 year old seriously, except they do go to the bathroom alone and DONT care that it is ewwwwwwwww. But they do eat more, so we ate out, went to kohls to get new school clothes, took hours it seemed to find the right Nikes, and the socks were just as bad!!!! Then we had to find a back pack oh my…. then he is thirsty because he expended so much energy, and like you it is 500 degrees out here in Texas. Then we had to get a hair cut today because it has to grow out alittle over the weekend because school starts Monday after all.
Then had a Dr. appointment to get a shot because now when they go to High school they have to have the Hepititis series of shots.
Tomorrow will be just as busy.. Thanks for asking.
Thank you for a much needed laugh before I turn in tonight Boomama. Too too funny!
I just blogged that it was 472 degrees (a mere 20 degrees cooler)inside my house -where I was all day today- as our air is temporarily out of order.:(
(I’m in Irondale and I have friends at TCaBH.)
Goodness, that sounds like my day!! :) Gymnastics to Sonic to Staples to Kroger to Office Depot at which point we had the meltdown in the cart, removed our shoes, and wailed until mama pulled Cheetos off the rack and gave them to us. In.Sanity. :) Glad to know I’m not the only one who likes to run their kids around like that!
Since you asked…
-washed goo-ga’s (Okie for “lots”) of laundry
-did occupational, physical and speech therapy with the two kids who need it
-gave allergy shots to the same two kids
-drove all the way across town for bedding and pellets for the guinea pigs in sweltering heat with a not-so-much-there-anymore air conditioner
-oversaw piano and harp practices
-slave-drove the little Rednecks to get this house whupped into shape because we’re leaving on vacation and the house must be S*P*O*T*L*E*S*S, just in case we die on some mountain pass and the church ladies come over.
-went to WalMart (didn’t see you there, though) to get last minute do-nothin’s for the trip, and to fortify my Mama Bag of little toys and treats. Oh, and I scored 40 glow sticks @ 88 cents/ea.
-did I mention goo-ga’s of laundry? Every stitch of clothing we have must be clean so that I have it all to pick from when we pack and so that when we die and the church ladies come, the hampers will be empty.
-took Mr. Clem to pick up his Suburban and the $250 repair ended up being $1100 because the flibbidy-jibbit was honkey-dooed and whatchadoodle needed a new goobersmooch. Who knew?
-Blogged when I should have been doing any/all of the above because blogging is more fun.
-Picked up some new videos at Mardel (Christian book/educational/music store). Their bathrooms were fine. I think Jesus would have approved.
-Played tag, rubbed backs, smooched cheeks, read aloud and ran through the sprinklers.
And now it’s after 10 and we’re still not loaded and I’d better get off before Mr. Clem throws the breaker.
Let’s see…woke up (that’s a start), made some coffee, made eggs for the kiddos, we played – Sugar went down for a nap, I did my workout (shhh that’s a secret), checked email, made lunch, the girls played in the playroom while I “rested” (I’m on antibiotics for something??), waited for Daddy and went to downtown Phoenix to pick up his car, headed to the Apple store to get his Video iPod fixed, went to California Pizza Kitchen for dinner (where we had a drink spill all over!), stopped at Jamba Juice for my favorite – a smoothie, drove home, Daddy gave girls a bath and put them to bed and I’m on the couch blogging enjoying the awesome and second thunderstorm ever to come thru Buckeye!
Pretty boring huh? Sorry you asked – maybe tomorrow will be more eventful!
Sounds like your day was just full of excitement. I just love the way you tell your stories! Our day wasn’t quite that busy. Took middle child to get her eye exam for kindergarten (took the boys along). Then after lunch and baby’s nap, we took the baby for his 1 yr pictures (he’s now almost 14 months). And since it’s terribly hot we had to make a trip for DQ blizzards tonight. Thanks again for a good laugh, Boomama!
Once again I find myself laughing, literally, out loud at your post to the point that my husband now thinks I am even crazier than he did earlier this evening.
Your day—much more eventful than mine. I played my daughter’s new version of Hide and Seek 4,000 times. Here is how it works “okay mommy, you get on your bed and hide here under this pillow. Now I am going to go into my room and count to twenty–don’t move. And I will come and find you”
Our day consisted of 3 timeouts before 9:30 a.m. Always an indication of a stellar day!
I love the Clampetts’ reference and “them thar metal stairs”. Also, it’s always comforting to know my child isn’t the only one wets her pants in public places.
I gotta tell ya, I am so NOT a shopper. I realized this fact when I took my children to the mall once and my five year yelled, and I do mean YELLED with glee, “Look Mom, moving stairs!”
You should have seen the looks I got that day.
let’s just say it involved poop, carpet and someone feeling they needed to “be free”, that was this morning…then tonight it was vomit..for no reason, he just apparently ate too much and at bedtime when he was having his milk he just let it all out…he is 21 months..should we be over this reflux thing..anyone who has experience with this please email me;( It just kills me to have to clean up and throw in the trash food his little body needs (plus the work and the smell) sigh.
lol!
well…my day…ummm….after reading all the comments I feel bad admitting this….I didn’t do much of anything today after feeding a house full of kids breakfast…I also feel compelled to apologize to all of you because I was such a bum today… :)
But I can CERTAINLY relate to the trip to the mall. More than once I’ve caught myself begging my kids to pleeeeease act like I’ve taken them out of the house once or twice!
Can’t stand escalators…I have three absolutely insane children yet I’m frightened by escalators…go figure
Wow. What a woman! I try to stick to no more than 2 stops at a time now that I have a baby. With the 10 year old I can handle anything…but with the baby, just getting her in and out of the carseat is a chore in itself.
I did nothing today. Had a visit by two teen girls, the stories on my blog. And I made some really good chicken and noodles!
I can sooo identify, my babysitter has been out of town for 8 days and my hubby has worked for 13 days straight…So my three 2 year olds have gone everywhere with me…the mall, the barber, to vote, you name it! And while it has been eventful, it has also been as you described “oddly fun.”
I’ve had a wild week, though not nearly as funny as your day.( I’ll bet you didn’t think is was funny at the time)
Anyway, I’m just sitting here giggling, can’t stop!
Thanks!
Well, I know this was yesterday you all are speaking of, but the days are blending over here.
Yesterday I did not leave my desk and computer or the house or cell phone or the television news almost all day long. Pop over to my post to find out why.
Once I did leave, I took all four kids to Friendly’s for dinner and ice cream (lots of ice cream) and to Old navy for some shopping therapy. It only remotely helped.
LLLOOOONNNGGG DAy! PS the bathrooms in all Friendly’s are to be avoided at all cost. The bathrooms in Old Navy are clean and even smell good! And yup, we needed to explore them both.
Thanks boomama for such an entertaining post.
oh and I love escalators, so much easier to find but just a little hint here, do. not. try. to take a double stroller on one. singles are great, doubles, un-uh.
Have a geat day.
Is this one of the joys of being older…..I don’t know, life can seem so boring in comparison to ya’ll’s (can you really have 2 apostrophe in one word????).
Anyway I left the house at 8:15, stopped at Walmart, arrived at work at 8:48, stayed until 5:00, met my husband at the apartments he is working on (because he locked his keys in the truck), went home, my brother-in-law brought us some KFC they had left over, so I didn’t have to cook, did a load of laundry and called it a night.
And I thank the Lord for every day!
Maybe these folks should have blogged? LOL I won’t get into my day because it was uneventful. Thank fully.
Have a great afternoon!
My oldest asked what are you laughing at mommy? Thanks for sharing my day was uneventful…until daddy got home and of course when I was ready to leave for my monthly mom’s of mulptiples (twins club) the van wouldn’t start and the twins and big brother were all crying….mommy don’t leave. So, I had to take daddy’s truck to go to the meeting.
Oh what a night….
Woo Doggy. Escalatory…you feeling’ alright, BooMama? As for the public potties- at least part of the time your child doesn’t have actually sit on them. EWWWWW! But I put down that thin layer of toilet paper for her and of course, she is much safer…
Sounds fairly normal to me… LOL!! Glad to know you are familiar with every bathroom in town too!!! Oooh, the joys of a mom…
Ah, great post. When I’m in my “normal” state, I’m pretty good about keeping on top of my errands, but having a new baby prevents me from being “normal,” so my errand-running these days tends to be sporadic and chaotic. But that’s okay.
But let’s see…my day yesterday…
Well, the big news was that I actually exercised in…well, I’d rather not say how long it’s been. And I worked on my “100th post” thingy that had to get posted on my blog today. And my sweet husband took me out to pick out some chairs for what we call “the library” but which would be more accurately called “the room with cluttered bookshelves where we currently lay on the floor because it has no seating and where we wrestle with our seven-year-old and where our cat likes to drop tons of hair.” We didn’t buy the chairs, mind you, but we did pick them out. Progress.
Thanks for the smile.
Boomama: Call it exercise and go on with your happy little self. I love the fascination of children and the joy they see in things we take for granted. Really, I’ve always wanted to slide down the space between the elevators. A kid could do it. Me, I’d get taken to the loony bin to have lunch with you. Hey, now there’s an idea…
Well, I sort of remember what those days were like, but whew! am I glad my kiddos are older now. But this does remind me to pray for strength and stamina for you young moms! In fact I wish I could send you a Starbucks gift card, cause I know you could use it….hey, why don’t they just deliver, kind of like the Ice Cream man??? Can you just see the moms lined up on the street…and the traffic lined up behind that truck? Wow, what an idea!! I’m going to call Starbucks right now………….
Jason’s Deli! We have one of those in the city I live in, we just ate dinner there the other night (I love this place)!
You really must email me (adoptive_mom_1@yahoo.com) to tell me where you live. I promise to keep it under wraps. :)
I live off writing my to do lists as well. I loose my mind if I loose my list…literally.
I can totally relate to your meeting up with your buddy to just fetch stuff for the kids together. I often wonder why I try to arrange get togethers with my friends when it is a whole lotta extra work and we barely get to talk, but I guess it is better than no contact at all!!!
Yesterday? I’m pretty sure it involved laundry, wishing I didn’t have to cook dinner, explaining to my preschooler why the water is never too cold in the kiddie pool when it’s 105 outside, and pretending to do lesson plans. You know, the usual.
Sounds like an average day around these here parts too!!!
Well, I could relate to almost every situation. Going out in public is an adventure. That’s for sure. School clothes shopping & dr. appt. coming on Monday. Oh the fun to be had!