In Which My Nerves Have Proven Themselves To Be Surprisingly Resilient

An incomplete list of objects that were nearly destroyed by the four year-old yesterday:

– a window pane in the dining room
– the glass top of the living room coffee table
– a leg on the breakfast room table
– two remote controls
– the big toe on his left foot
– an arm of one of the living room chairs
– his bed frame
– a glass storm door
– a plastic pirate ship
– several wooden closet doors
– Superman’s cape

And then, at Office Max:

– a display of copier paper
– a faucet in the restroom
– a rack of computer games
– a metal shelving unit
– an upholstered desk chair

Last night on the phone I told Mama that I really don’t think it’ll be any time at all before he starts putting holes in the floors.

Using only the force of his ever-stomping feet.

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  1. I’ve heard Howards are like that.

  2. LOL! Aren’t 4 year old boys amazing? My Little Guy has an equally impressive list as of late…except I hardly ever take him into Office Max…
    It’s hard to describe what a room is like after he and his 1 year old little sisters get finished with it. Their energy is astounding.

  3. his BED FRAME???? oh my!!!! is he like a miniature Hulk or something?
    sounds like you (and he) need to start wearing hard-hats during play time!

  4. that list is pretty amazing. i’m sure he’ll be impressed with it when he is older. and, your kind of scaring me because my boy is 2 and it seems like (from your list) things are only going to get worse.

  5. It sounds like the 4 year old’s mama deserved a long nap after a day like that!

    I could make a very similar list for my 2 year old. As a matter of fact, she DID destroy the glass on my parents’ storm door this weekend. She ran full force, arms extended, right into the glass, shattering it into thousands of pieces. Praise God, she wound up with only a few minor cuts and a bunch of nasty scratches. I have to tell you, both Momma and Daddy were ready for a nap after that ER visit.

    These wee ones can really keep us on our toes, can’t they?

  6. I can only say “Ohhhh Myyyy.” I can see my future in your little Alex (Howard.) I have a 10 1/2 month old son, my first boy, and we are definately headed down the road of destruction (cue scary music.) Just yesterday he crawled into his oldest sister’s room, pulled a glass candle off a table, broke it, and then proceeded to try and eat the broken glass. A scary moment for me, for sure. Luckily (I guess) it was a large piece of glass he picked up, and he only had the corner of it in his mouth. I gently took it away, expecting to see blood somewhere, but thankfully he was ok. God really does take care of them when we just can’t. Anyway, hang in there, it sounds like you’ve got a healthy, active, “all boy” boy!

  7. Boomama- welcome to the world of having a 100% BOY in the family? Are you thinking about having more kids?
    I have an 11 year old and it really is no different from a 4 year old- He is still rambunctious, destructive and has no attention span- But my 4 year old little girl is just an angel- not hyper or destructive at all- Girls are just totally different!
    Boys just get bigger bodies with a different set of issues- like refusal to do homework and such….Much luck to you!

  8. That same seemingly destructive powers can be put to good use! The key is finding something that is useful to YOU in which to channel his… uhhh… superpowers.

    We’re in the midst of a remodel and my 6 and 8yo boys completely demo’d the walls and ceiling for us. A ladder and a hammer. I suppose we should’ve given them helmets too since my 8yo got a little overly excited and knocked himself in the noggin when he swung back really far.

    Or maybe no helmet and chalk it up to learning thing the hard way! ;-)


    PS By the way, the foot stomping skills are great for squishing nasty bugs. The running is good for racing to the mailbox and back. The creativity side of them is good for figuring how to rig the trashcan to the back of the bike with bungee cords…it’s faster than walking to the end of the driveway!

  9. Do you think that maybe he actually is a Super Hero? I wonder if there’s a Center for Super Hero Testing or some such, where you could covertly have the little tyke’s powers tested.

    It’s worth checking into.

  10. Oh, man!
    Is this what I have to look forward to with two boy’s!?

    Lock up the sugar!

  11. He and Zach would get along great!!! They could rampage everything, LOL. Boys are so rambunctious.

  12. sigh. I feel your distress. All three of my boys are destroyers. With the 6 month old bent on destroying everything with the power of drool. I might need to start wearing a raincoat.

  13. I guess I wouldn’t get any sympathy from you for my brand new bottle of fingernail polish dropped, shattered and permanently splattered on my brand new floor last night would I.

  14. LOL I am glad we have 6 acres and theres plenty outside for him to destroy…now if only the sun would cool off just a lil bit.
    seriously though the stomping feet…I think it may jsut be a 4 y/o thing everyone i know w/ boys this age has similar issues.

  15. He sounds a lot like my youngest. We call him William the Mirauder!

  16. That Howard is such a hoot!

    Currently I am watching 2 four year olds, and 2 seven year olds playing some sort of card game on our coffee table. (The rules are probably similar to Calvin-cards) The four year old boy was slamming the glass top for his cards just as I was reading this. His name isn’t Howard, so I guess destruction is more of a boy thing than a Howard thing. :D

  17. It’s official, I’m starting a savings account for damage repair, not college! After Shannon’s post yesterday and now your’s today I have no other option!

  18. Praise God for little men and their need to destroy. I know you have you hands full with Brother Howard. Deep breath Boomama. Deep breath.

  19. He is his Mama’s child.

  20. I love this, it brings back so many memories! I also loved the comment with the great idea for transporting the trash can to the end of the driveway. LOL!

  21. Awwww sweetie … (((HUGS))) … I can sooo identify! I know it doesn’t help you any LOL …. just feel the cyberhugs!

  22. I didn’t even get to the “home” list before I cracked up laughing. I can’t help but wonder if he has any bruises.

  23. When my daughter was about 3, she and the babysitter’s kid (same age) attempted to take a bedroom door off its hinges. Luckily, they couldn’t reach the top pin. That kid was a beast. She’s the reason my hair is gray, my skin is wrinkled, and my heart is 10 times too small (from her squeezing the ever-lasting life out of it!). :)

  24. The story I heard was that you were standing on #6, throwing # 9 and nearly took out #1, #2, #3 and number #8.

    The rest was just collateral damage.

    Really, though.

    Trying to blame a sweet, quiet 4 year old.

    Tsk. Tsk.

  25. I am afraid. Very afraid.

  26. You ARE scaring me. What are we supposed to do with these creatures? I need more ideas from Marsha!

  27. Thanks for the list . . . it made me feel better. I have three boys (2,4, and 7). Most days it feels like I am mothering three tornadoes. Would that make me mother nature?
    Praise God for rubbermaid!

  28. Oh Boomama – I’m the mother of 3 girls. My list would look diffent. Instead of things they almost destroyed yesterday, it would read….. things they cried/whined about yesterday.

  29. Yes – I meant different – not diffent. :) See all of the crying in the background was distracting me!

  30. You poor thing.
    Come to think of it though, I feel like this could be me too!

  31. We used to call our redhead “Destructo Dan.” He could pull the cover off the top bunk mattress, make holes in the car upholstery, etc. with ease! Today he can take apart AND put together just about anything. Maybe Howard will go on to greater things (meaning “putting them back together,” NOT “destroying bigger things”! GAK!) Enjoy! From your hiding-from-the-Central-Texas-heat fan club!

  32. I think to myself, at times, if I survive having a boy…..

    They are such fun, but sheesh! The nerves and my heart have really taken a beating. And he’s only 1 1/2

  33. jerry and susan says:

    sounds like it could be training camp for the mission fields or a future LSU tiger football player to me

  34. jerry and susan says:

    one more thing school is about to start and as you know susan babysits. this week she has had nine preschoolers in our house. When i walk in the house for dinner it kind of reminds me of lunch time with the 182 airborne division because they are patrolling everywhere- you just have 1 girlfriend chill out!!!!

  35. Well the future only holds a lot of noise but not quite as destructive.
    Ouch, Sister! That was harsh! Don’t you know you blame it all on the Dad?? If I would have known my husband when we were kids nooooo waaaaaay would I have married him!

  36. Phyllis R. says:

    Mother of two BOYS here and can totally relate. Throw in an active husband, and I find myself thinking about my “happy place” quite often. Or should I say my happy QUIET place? Mercy they are busy, aren’t they?

  37. Bless your heart…

  38. OH my gravy! I have a 4 and a 5 year old boys, and boy to they give me a run for my money!

  39. I was reading your list but had to stop to admire the newfound blackberry jelly stain accenting the red popsicle saturation on my beige carpet..

  40. Oh yeah – the list of nearly destroyed items is long here too. College fund vs. home maintenance/liability fund – it’s a toss up.

  41. preachin’ to the choir, sister. preachin’ to the choir. we feel your pain.

  42. Jabber Jaws says:

    We are embattled in potty training camp. Today my daughter won. She tinkled, no wait, she flooded, the inside of the fridge. Yep, standing inside the fridge reaching into the cheese drawer, she felt the need to baptize the fridge in a golden shower. Then, as only a toddler can do, she took off her panties and left them on the shelf in said fridge. Glorious. Score one for the toddler. I thought this might make you feel better.

  43. Today my 4 year old climbed the refrigerator. Yes, CLIMBED IT! As in reached as high as his little arms could reach, which just put them in the space between the freezer & fridge doors. Then he pulled his body upward and basically scaled as high as he could get his feet up the fridge door. Then he couldn’t understand why we don’t CLIMB the refrigerator!!! Thankfully it didn’t break! Can you just hear me? “Yes, Honey, I need a new fridge because YOUR son broke the door off the hinges of the one we have.”

    Four year old boys. Gotta love ’em.

  44. Please don’t do this to me. I just spent an entire evening visiting the great-grandparents’ house and saying over and over in my head, “they will be four in November and it will all be better then”(as I said OUT LOUD “no, don’t touch that…stop doing that…get off of that…where did they go…what was that noise…why is your brother crying…what is that all over you”). Don’t tell me that it will NOT be better when they are four. I just don’t know if I can face it. Seriously.

  45. times like this I’m glad I have a quiet girlie girl!! lol.

  46. Preach it sister! I have two (Lord have mercy – twins!) just like that and one of them is named Alex. The other however is most definity NOT named Howard.
    By any chance did you have to nail the cupboard doors on your TV stand shut so they won’t FALL OFF, too?

  47. i SO have a list like this. but mine is a GIRL. is that bizarre or perfectly normal??

  48. Maybe little “Howard” is part Tasmanian Devil?

  49. Yup… sounds like Hunter is on his way to be… his hero.


  50. Oh Sista,

    Can I ever relate to this! My 6 year old (the Worm) is capable of raising the dead sleeping (myself included) by simply walking the two steps from his bed ladder to his bedroom door. While in the shower I can hear him walk ( and I use the term loosely) from bed all the way down stairs, through the kitchen to the bathroom door every morning, and yet I can’t hear him talking to me once he gets in the bathroom to brush his teeth :) He has shaken glass bowls off the counter and even knocked his dad’s banjo ( in the livingroom) over while walking in his bedroom (upstairs)

    I pray that an end comes eventually

  51. Silly-Head is no longer destructive, but my child (bless her dear little soul) leaves a trail of food EVERYWHERE SHE GOES.

    No, I am NOT exaggerating.

    Broom! I need a BROOM!

  52. BooMama…if we could get your sweet boy and my two rascally dogs to channel this energy for good and not evil…your sweet boy could RULE THE WORLD with his two sidekicks Maynard and Joey.

  53. I am still laughing :) I have Irish Twins–A boy and A girl. When they were 4 We WENT TO THE PARK EVERY DAY! Rain or Shine. I would get to the park at about 9 and we would leave every afternoon at about 4. (Like this would stop them or make them tired)

    They are now teens–I remember some very sound advice from a friend…Raising Teens is like controlling the waves in the ocean.

    We don’t go to the ER like we used to. Our Oops, Crash Boom–I’m Ok has calmed down to a quiet roar. However, Silence in teens is not always good by the way.

    The best advice I ever got from someone was–Teens,now I know now why animals eat their young.

    My 15 year old asked me what that meant? I quietly told him DON’T PUSH ME.