Oh. Now I Understand.

A few years ago I felt completely overwhelmed by the toys in our house. And feeling overwhelmed by the toys made me feel overwhelmed by the pantry. And feeling overwhelmed by the pantry made me feel overwhelmed by the upstairs linen closet. And on and on it went, until I finally had a small, private nervous breakdown and cleaned out every single room / closet / cabinet in our house while I cried and wailed about ALL THE CHAOS and used old dustrags to wipe my tear-stained face.

Oh, it was an ugly time. But the results were marvelous.

At some point during my obsessive diligent cleaning-out process, I ran across FlyLady‘s how-to-keep-your-house-clean website. And while I don’t get the FlyLady emails anymore – mainly because I think 467 emails a day distract me more than they inspire me – I do remember a few of her tips, and I think about them all the time.

For example, FlyLady encourages her readers to wake up every morning and get dressed from head to toe, then put on lace-up shoes. It cracks me up that FlyLady specifies that we need to get dressed from “head to toe,” mainly because it makes me picture somebody putting on a shirt, looking at her bare legs, and then thinking, “Yep. I’m done. That’s enough clothes for the day.”

And as far as lace-up shoes are concerned – well, no. No thank you. Uggs? Yes. Flip-flops? Yes. Lace-up shoes? Not so much. Not first thing in the morning, at least. I need some time and some coffee before I’m ready to tie laces. I think it’s probably right and healthy for all of us to be well-familiar with our personal lacing terms and conditions.

Another FlyLady tip? Make sure you keep your kitchen sink clean. I actually really like this tip and try to use it every day. There’s something about a sink that looks clean and pretty that makes me not care quite as much about the crumbs around my kitchen table. The only downside is that I have a white porcelain sink at our current house – not a stainless sink like I had at the other one – and OH, I MISS THE SHINY. I try to make my white sink shine, but it is impossible. There’s always some drop of something that ruins the magic. So these days I pretty much just wipe it down and avert my eyes and pretend like it looks absolutely beautiful.

Amen.

The other FlyLady tip I remember is to set aside five minutes every night to straighten up the “hot zones” in your house. Hot zones are areas that tend to collect clutter, and during the major clean-out of a few years ago, we really only had one identifiable hot zone: the coffee table in the living room. At that point in time Alex wasn’t in school, there were no papers scattered around, and toys mainly hung out on the floor. I felt a little superior about our absence of noticeable clutter, in fact. Prided myself on how well we kept the mail and the random papers to a minimum.

Well.

This morning I was getting dressed (from head to toe! but still no laces!), and as I looked around the house with some coffee-fueled eyes, I started to feel a little frustrated by all the clutter. It seemed like there was paper everywhere I looked. And after seeing what was seriously the fifth stack-o-junk, I remembered FlyLady’s hot zones tip. I got a little tickled.

Because seriously?

We don’t just have zones that are hot.

Our zones are on FI-IRE.

And trust me when I tell you that those three pictures are just the tip of the proverbial FLAMING HOT ICEBERG.

So I’m going to clean now.

For the record, I don’t think I’ll ever finish.

Hold me.

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Comments

  1. Thank you for putting your piles on the web. It makes my camera-shy piles feel oh-so-much better. I know because they told me so.

  2. Oh. My. Word. Such a funny post. I lost it at hold me. No truer words have been spoken about on footwear before coffee.
    Now I must visit FlyLady on a quest for tips on “guiltless purging of all things unnecessary yet saved for a someday.”

  3. Bless you, for being so open with your “hot zones”. It is always nice to know that we are all in this thing called motherhood and life together….and that I am not the only chic with fire hazards in my house!

  4. Ha! I quit subscribing to the emails from FlyLady for the same reason. And I never wear shoes in the house…ever. The only thing I implement on a regular basis is the shiny sink. Can you come to my house and clean out my linen closet, pantry and coat closet? Please?

  5. Please stop sneaking into my home and taking photographs for all the Internet to see. Thank you.

  6. I’m so with you. Flylady totally needs to chill on the shoe thing.

    However, the things she has been really right on in my house are as follows:

    1. Kitchen sink
    2. One load of laundry a day (this truly changed my life)
    3. It doesn’t have to be perfect, just make it a little better today. Tomorrow you can make it a little better than that.

    Those crazy kids go through stages that really mess with you (pun intended). I’ve got a 2 yr old in the Toy Stage, a 9 yr old in the Prolific Writer/Artist stage, and and 11 yr old in the Massive Amounts of Sports Equipment Stage.

    It. Is. Killing. Me. We can hold eachother.

  7. Ha! You are so making me laugh with the FlyLady references. Seriously, though! If I had sat down to read all those e-mails every day, I NEVER would’ve gotten ANYTHING done. I finally had to quit getting them because I felt so guilty for not reading them. Then I quit shining my sink. And I quit putting on my shoes. Then I added a nap to my routine….Hmmm. Maybe I should re-subscribe. Nah, that might cut into my TiVo time. :)

    p.s. Is it too embarrassing for me to admit that our smoke detector went off at 2:00 a.m. this morning because it was full of dust? FlyLady would be ashamed.

  8. THANK YOU for being a normal person with normal person clutter and not feeding the myth that something’s wrong with you if your house doesn’t look like a freakin’ IKEA all the time.

  9. I so needed to read this today. I am taking a quick break from cleaning to catch up on blogs. My house is a disaster. I think I might need to check this FlyLady out!

  10. I have the cure to your piles-o-junk: a 15 month old boy who climbs on the kitchen table. I’m telling you, it’s a sure fire way to keep your table cleaned off! I can’t make any promises for what the floor will look like though. :)

  11. The Fly Lady a.k.a. Marla is from my hometown of Brevard, NC. I get a kick when I hear her on K-Love and think “somebody” from my hometown has made it big on the internet and radio!

    I had a hot-zone breakdown this weekend complete with wailing and gnashing of teeth. My hot zones were closets. I found myself compelled to clean them all in one fail swoop, but then I remembered Flylady’s advice to set a 15-minute timer, clean for 15 minutes, and then relax. It’s unreal what you can get done in 15 minutes if you are focused on that task. I had all my “hot zone” closets cleaned by the end of the day using that method, and I was so less stressed by tackling them 15 minutes at a time.

  12. Laughing.uncontrollably! Yes. Me, too! I wrote earlier that I had oxes in ditches all over the place. Aye. “I need you Jesus to come to my rescue.”

  13. I feel your pain. I too used to be a Fly baby. I still keep the sink clean and there is a small area on the kitchen table that is usually clean. But it ends there. I’m married to a hoarder and I’ve already told him that I have the rent a dumpster on speed dial. I’ll be calling them before his body is cold. (God forgive me)

  14. Sooo..thanks for making me laugh. I used to get all those emails but I cancelled them because they made me feel inadequate. Yep, I have issues…

    I am so glad you actually posted pics of your hot zones. It makes me feel better about my own in some sick, twisted way that makes no sense. My hubby came home from work about a half hour ago and noted the clutter. I told him that my blog friends have clutter in their homes too. And that I had photographic proof.

    Somehow it didn’t mean anything to him.

    Humph!

  15. I unsubscribed from FlyLady for the overwhelming e-mail reason also, but I do need a cleaning/de-cluttering coach. Our hot spots are driving me crazy! I still don’t have a solution to this problem…

  16. Aahh, Flylady, I do remember my flylady times. And yet again I am another one of those who unsubscribed because of the zillion emails. But I too did find little things from my flylady lessons that I still keep.

    I am glad that you shared your pictures, because at least then I know I am not the only one with a house that is ready to burn down with its little hot zones. LOL

  17. Stephanie says:

    You totally have me cracking up again. Soooo funny. Yes we have some FLAMING zones as well around here.

  18. Thank God somebody’s house looks like mine! My entire kitchen is a hotzone! I hooked up with FlyLady the first week in January. I can’t keep up with her. I’m with you on the flip flops! I’m working on my kitchen slowly but surely!!

  19. I am the same way. It’s amazing how much cleaner the kitchen looks when the sink is empty & clean. However the area I have a complete meltdown over is our island in our kitchen. I don’t like clutter on the counters, but the surrounding counters I can handle. Our center island I can not. So everyday I get it cleaned off and sparkling clean and every day my husband comes in and throws his lunch box, his jacket and whatever assorted papers he has on it. And he still looks at me with a confused face when I give the big stink eye.

  20. Karen Hokanson says:

    Oh, thank you, Boo Mama. I always envision other peoples’ houses as clutter free. But one of my collections is piles of paper. I have too many hot spots to even mention. Somehow, I feel a little better about it now.
    Karen in CA

  21. I laughed so hard when I read this tonight. My Father walked into my house tonight and said “My Goodness!”
    I am 57-sent 2 friends off to Haiti yesterday, my son-in-laws Mother had a mild stroke {at 55} this morning, I am getting ready for a Big {for me} oil painting gallery show next week, and my three year old Grandson wanted he and I to practice our Circus Tricks for the Atlanta Circus also next week {he thinks we will be performing at}. Life is Good.

  22. I think we all have those hot spots in our homes…

    I couldn’t lace up shoes before coffee either.

  23. My house is one giant hot-spot. Daily source of frustration.

  24. Why did they send so many emails? It stressed me out and felt like it only added to the clutter. So I unsubscribed. And never cleaned a thing. But I feel the same way about the toys leading to the pantry to the laundry room/linen closet/office . . . the stress just builds and i sit there and stress rather than doing anything about it.

  25. Well, if you get yours done, you are more than welcome to come do mine. Cause heaven knows I’ll never get it done.

  26. Bless you! You and I must be soulmates. I tried to be a Flybaby, couldn’t take all the emails, and my hot zones are like lava–flowing from one surface to the next, with hardly an inch to distinguish between them. And I feel just a twinge of rebellion every time I choose lace-less shoes.

    But my sink is shiny! Praise Jesus for the small things!

  27. We had a porcelain white sink at our last house, and OH how the stains irritated me! There was much scrubbing, and much bleaching…only to be repeated again next week. I found a white sink liner (or maybe it was clear?) with suction cups that I stuck on the bottom of the sink. That way, I could scrub (or bleach) that when I needed to, it didn’t absorb the stains like the porcelain did, AND it prevented little nicks and dings on my dishes!
    I love FlyLady and probably need to spend some time with her again. :o)

  28. i’m in the middle of one of those whole-house overhaul breakdowns right now! thank you for sharing your hot spots. i love it when we show each other the not-so-pretty stuff in our lives. :0)

  29. Love the comment that says thanks for sneaking into her house and taking pics for everyone to see. I feel the same way!!

    And I think it is HILARIOUS that you stalled cleaning by taking pictures and writing a post about. Reminds me of the time in college that my roommate and I made a list of the top 30 ways to stall studying – making a list being one of those top ways!

    Hope you got at least one of the fire spots put out today! :)

  30. Oh Soph- It would take way more than 5 minutes to clean up my hot zones. The fire deaprtment might show up any minute.
    The Park Wife

  31. IT’S LIKE YOU’RE INSIDE MY HEAD. Or like you’re the funnier, blonder, (oh, I’ll go ahead and say it) whiter version of me. Which come to think of it makes you very different from me, but let me get back to my point which is YOU’RE READING MY MIND. I, too, have rued the day that I said that I would never let toys get out of control in my house. And the messes in my bathroom, pantry, home office, etc etc, have me wailing and gnashing my teeth. And FlyLady’s first step of shining your sink has made me look at my white sink in shame (although I’ve found that scrubbing it with a paste made from something like Comet makes it whiter). And the lacing up of shoes seemed like an unnecessary step for a woman that doesn’t want to look like she shops at the Stein Mart with the ladies from her bridge club (although I’m a convert in the laced shoes department).

    Include a sick baby and a family wedding and this post will describe my mental state these last two weeks.

  32. My house was on fire Monday morning. Better now.

    I hate laces too!! Can’t remember the last time I tied some. Probably when I went for a jog. In September-ish.

  33. So funny. I am at the computer avoiding all the flames right now. In fact, I have a name for this, well, condition. It’s FSS, or Flat Surface Syndrome. I have it bad. There is not a single flat surface in our home that is not covered with a bunch of…mess.
    One day…I keep hoping it will all clean itself.

  34. I cannot seem to even get step one accomplished! With my husband working from the home office this week, the sink continues to pile up…and I’m not even here to use it!!! “Open door – Pull out shelf – place cup/bowl/mug/plate/spoon/etc on shelf” Not hard to do…

    Step 2…hot zones on any flat surface this week. Yikes!!! Monday’s mail, dining room. Tuesday’s mail, kitchen counter and coffee bar and side table next to his chair and coffee table and…. Get the picture?

    The trash bag comes out in the morning!!!Along with the flip flops.

  35. I can totally relate to the fly lady… hot zone.. in over my head thing… I’m glad I’m not alone!

  36. I did the flylady thing for a year or two back when my first child was 1 or 2. You know, young enough where I still had control (“control”) over the clutter.

    *sigh*

    I was quite tempted today to take a picture of the volcano of paper that has erupted in my house. My oldest son cannot think unless his hands are cutting 87 pieces of scrap paper to shreds, and then taping them together to make all manner of messy (“creative”) things. Oh, the zones, they are on fire indeed.

    The one thing I wish I could get back to doing is how flylady cleans a zone (which amounts to a room or an area) a week. Shoot, I don’t actually “clean,” (true story) but doing a nice pick-up and culling once a month would be good.

  37. You have a gossip bench! From what I could tell, it looks just like mine.

    Be sure to post after pictures so we can all be duly impressed.

  38. It’s so reassuring to know that a hot zone the size of our entire house is actually normal. Bless you and your readers for making me feel better about our mess.

  39. God bless you, girl! Thank you for making me not feel so crazy about being so crazy about all my clutter.

    Seriously, I started watching Hoarders on A&E and it just starts me to run around and tackle stuff more often.Have you tried it?

  40. I must say I had never heard of FlyLady until this morning. However, all my life (college years included), I absolutely must have a clean sink to be able to function properly. As the daughter of a plumber, I must tell you that there should be something that will put a nice shine to your sink. I know we have a “CorStone” sink, that has a polish that brings it back to life everytime. Something tells me it would work for you as well!

  41. Ahhh. Your piles made me feel right at home! I often say (to my one boy) that it looks like a family of 12 lives here! Don’t know how it happens, but the piles keep coming back! I also enjoyed FlyLady, but not the 467 emails daily!

  42. WOAH, my 2 favorite cyber people uniting in one place… WIERD! :o)
    Next thing I know, Ellen will be featuring BooMama & FlyLady together… lol

    And yes, thank you for showing us your clutter – makes me feel better, because if YOU have clutter, then how many other zillions of people also do? I am not alone. Hooray!

  43. I blame it all on my husband. The piles around my house are all his (wink, wink). I try to wait for him sort through it because I would probably thow away the one piece of paper he really wants to keep and keep the one thing he could care less about that just got caught up in it all. Sometimes I think the only solution is to put a for sale sign up in the yard…but then no one would buy a house full of visible hot zones. It’s a vicious cycle, isn’t it?

    Consider yourself held.

  44. My entire house is on fire. Love this post, especially the part about the 467 emails Flylady sends everyday. It’s about to do me in.

  45. Girl….I am so feeling your pain!
    I am convinced that we are the BIGGEST white trash family in the world!
    And we’re clean people!
    Hmm
    The clutter…..the stack-o-junk…..the stuffed closets….the piled up laundry room & storage room & garage!
    They all haunt me like a dark cloud!

    I need a total Flylady makeover! She would probably want to leave her tidy career after dealing with my packrat family!
    :)

  46. I learned FlyLady’s methods the first few years I was married–and I am so thankful.

    That shiny sink really does spread to other areas of the kitchen.
    And that bed that gets made as soon as I get up keeps the rest of our bedroom clean.

    Hot zones still pop up (I’m looking at one right now on our kitchen island) but I know how to put them out. Reboot.

  47. Mama Chris says:

    I too have been trying to fly. It’s not going well. I fall out of the nest too often and can’t get back off the ground.(so sorry for puns–been married too long)
    Sink=shiny (DH noticed last night)
    Shoes=never (would requireextensive carpet shampooing-pshhh)
    Hot Spots=couple, but not visible to naked eye
    Overall…getting there…but not willing to show pictures.
    You.are.my.hero.-you.brave.girl.you.

  48. oh, i love how you make me laugh out loud and clap my hands in the morning! and the comments! oh the comments! i’ll be laughing all day!

    thank you!

  49. Jennifer in CT says:

    Why is this so exciting to me? I was so down on myself for my piles until I found out you had them, too. Amazon, do you want to hurry up with Beth Moore’s new book, please? I need it now!

  50. It makes me feel better about myself to see that Boomama has clutter too. :) And I’ve read FlyLady, and “lace-up shoes” makes me think of orthopedic granny spongy-soled shoes. Maybe I will wear them when I actually am a granny, but not yet!

  51. Thank God somebody elses house looks just like mine…lol!

  52. I, too, have been overwhelmed with the clutter in my house. The overwhelming feelings have intensified lately due to watching the TV show “Hoarders”. Even a tiny pile of clutter causes me to think that I am just a step away from needing an intervention. I cleaned out a closet, some kitchen cabinets, and some bathroom cabinets this past weekend just to prove that I can do it! I don’t really feel that much better, though, because I did nothing about all the stuff that can actuallly be seen and/or tripped over.

    Enjoy your cleaning frenzy. And thank you for making me laugh.

  53. Oh sister, I feel you! I have flaming infernos around here. I tackled one yesterday and was so pleased, maybe I’ll lace up some shoes and get to the next one!

  54. Oh my! The half dressed part made me laugh!
    I signed up for FlyLady tweets & got so overwhelmed, the house was even messier. So, thanks for giving me some of her tips in nutshell form.

  55. Nothing puts out hotzones like company. What truely amazes me is that my closet doesn’t burn down the house from me stuffing all the hotzone kindling in there.

  56. KS*Rebecca says:

    I also have a porcelain sink and I’m able to make it *sparkle* with Soft Scrub. I leave it on for about 5-10 than go to town with an old dish scrubber. Has cleaned every stain, every time!

  57. Boo Mama, I read your blog pretty often but I think this is my first comment….sorry.

    All I can say is AMEN, AMEN, AND AMEN. My house is nothing but clutter and it is getting the best of me. I work a job outside my home and I have a 4 year old. I CAN NOT GET CONTROL of my house. I started a few months ago tring to go through areas in the house and pack up junk getting ready for a yard sale I plan to have this spring but the junk seems to be multipling. Can you offer any more help?

  58. I used to be able to tame the clutter so much better before my oldest started school too but it’s SO much harder now that he’s in school! I cleaned out closets this week too and if felt to good!

    p.s. I can see two “hot zones” from here. Ugh.

  59. I will admit that the Flylady has done some great things in my life. (My husband would prefer that I not admit this in public.) I no longer feel quite so overwhelmed and the fact that you can get so many things done in 15 minutes was an eye-opener. I agree that there are many, many emails and I’m pretty good at deleting them if I don’t have time to read them. But I always wondered if there were people out there for whom Flylady didn’t work…because all her emails are about people whose lives were amazingly changed. Now I know from all the comments that there are a lot of people out there who haven’t been able to Fly as easily as she thinks you should. Very interesting!

  60. My hot zones are just creative spaces. ha!

  61. Linda in Austin says:

    You crack me up…and I love you!! White porcelain sink = yuck. I have one. Bar Keepers Friend is the best cleaner ever, then a sink liner, and you’re good to go. I raised two boys and my house was a complete disaster. Now they are college grads and I STILL have their boxes of crap..go figure.

  62. As someone who works from home. I can totally understand the FlyLady’s shoe thing. It’s not really the SHOES, but the mindset of getting up and getting yourself ready for your day.
    I cannot tell you the number of times I have needed to leave the house in a hurry and wasted valuable time getting myself ready. And once, I didn’t even try. I HAD to go to the cleaners because my husband wouldn’t have had pants to wear to an appointment that was in 40 mintues. I went in my pajamas. I did stop to put on a bra. I do have some self respect. Not much apparently.
    My point is, and I think it is the FL’s, take the time when you first get up to put yourself together then you’ll have time to get your house and whatever else you have to do, ready.

  63. Destiny D. says:

    Oh Boo!

    My shame greets you at the front door these days!

    I agree about the sink, and I am maticulous about mine — the bed, not so much. I’m a big fan of “airing it out!”

    Honestly, I can justify just about anything and everything I do!

  64. That Fly Lady sent me emails for about a week before I wanted to start sending them back.

    And we don’t have hot zones either. And it isn’t that our zones are on fire. It’s that the whole darn house is burning up. I am ready to throw in the towel because I can’t get the sink empty long enough to clean it let alone shine it.

    Thanks for showing pictures. Always makes me feel at home.

  65. Hey, if I knew how to upload the photos and all that sort of hi-tech stuff, I could make you feel LOTS better! My husband thinks ANY EMPTY SPACE is a space JUST FOR HIM to pile ALL MANNER OF JUNK! I just don’t get it. And I am NOT a neat freak, but his areas-to-destroy are in the living room and right when people come in the back door (no one comes in my front door). At least my spaces are in the back bedroom where I can shut the door and hide it! Thanks for lettin me get that off my chest! Now a question – how can you keep the STAINLESS sink shiny? Mine has greenish sort of build-up and I’ve tried EVERYTHING to get it off. For a clue, my bathtubs are white and they are regularly stained blue. Comet Bathroom and/or Scrubbing Bubbles takes care of that, but not the stainless sink. I welcome any suggestions!

  66. Well, I don’t get the emails anymore either, but I have to stand up and say I HAVE to wear shoes now if I want to get anything done. Before I listened to Flylady, my legs always ached and my arches were falling and when I started wearing shoes (tennies mostly) my legs started feeling much better. And it’s a treat at the end of the day to take my shoes off. Since I can’t “come home” it’s the closest thing I have to being “off work. : )

    Even without the emails, I’m helped by her advice every. single. day. I don’t do all of it, but enough that I’m in much better shape than before I found her! : )

  67. Yes. I used to subscribe to Flylady’s emails. For about 3 days. Then I deleted all 1,149 of them and realized that the stress I felt was COUNTER productive to what she desired to accomplish.

    BUT, just the other day I ran across my “cleaning zones” worksheet on our computer. I promptly deleted it and made a mental check for cleaning up that “hot spot” on my computer.

    Thanks Flylady!

    (That is all said in good hearted humor. She actually did help me in quite a few areas. Please take no offense Flylady, should you ever read this. Although you’d probably take offense if you ever stepped foot in my house.)

  68. Oh those emails nearly drove me over the edge! She apparently has no problem with a cluttered in box, eh?

    I was just thinking about the 21 fling boogey, the other day. She was a hoot, that much is for sure!!

  69. Thank you! I sometimes feel as I am the only one overwhelmed by the piles of paper and clutter in my home. I spent quite a bit of time last night decluttering our breakfast bar, our number one clutter spot. I didn’t get it all, but I managed to make it seem less overwhelming! Thank you!

  70. Flylady does not sound like someone with whom I would like to become friends. ; )

  71. I am sooooo feeling you on this post this snowy Saturday morning! I have fiery zones all over this cluttered mess of a house! The basement (which I’ll refer to as the ultimate inferno) is my destination later today…you know after I make a path to the door!

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