This is a sponsored post from BlogHer and Smuckers.
I’m not sure where I first got the idea of putting notes in our little man’s lunchbox. I know that it wasn’t any sort of original concept, so my best guess is that I probably saw Claire Huxtable put a note in one of her kids’ lunchboxes on The Cosby Show when I was younger. Of course I wasn’t consciously trying to pick up parenting tips from a TV show when I was, you know, thirteen, but I’ve never been one to underestimate the lasting influence of a family sitcom.
I mean, do you know how many times I’ve thought about Jan Brady running into the family portrait on her bicycle when I’m trying to teach our son about being responsible?
YOU ONLY HAD TO WEAR THE GLASSES, JAN.
YOU ONLY HAD TO WEAR THE GLASSES.
Regardless of where the idea originated, I first started putting notes in Alex’s lunches when he was in Mothers’ Day Out. At the time he couldn’t really read, of course, so I’d just draw a big heart and then sign “Mama” at the bottom. When he started four year-old kindergarten and was recognizing a few words, I moved up to “Alex – I love you, Mama” – and the notes have gotten more elaborate over the last couple of years. He always thanks me for the notes when I pick him up from school, and lots of times I’ll find the notes when I unpack his lunchbox – with little jelly or Cheetos fingerprints all along the edges.
Last year Alex ate in the school cafeteria a good bit (I have NO IDEA why, but he really gets a kick out of going through the lunch line), so I didn’t pack lunches nearly as often. But at the end of the school year, his class had a field day, and since the cafeteria was going to be closed that day, the teachers asked us to send a lunch to school.
It just so happened that the week of field day was a hard one for us because our dog Maggie died. She hadn’t been well for awhile, and I don’t think any of us were prepared for how difficult it was when she finally passed away. Alex took her death particularly hard – it was the first time he’s ever had to say good-bye to something he loved – and the week was filled with hard questions and hard answers. We talked a lot about the fact that there’s purpose in every single thing that happens in our lives, and we talked about how grateful we were that we got to share life with Maggie.
But oh, how he cried. And oh, how he missed her.
When I was packing his lunch the Friday morning of field day, I decided to stick a note inside. I tried to make it upbeat and comforting because I knew how much his little heart was still hurting. And sure enough, when I picked him up from school that afternoon, he said, “Thanks, Mama, for the note you sent me. It made me smile.”
A few days ago I asked Alex why he likes it so much when I send him little notes, and he said, “Because when I’m thinking about you at school, the note reminds me that you’re thinking about me, too.” It’s such a small thing to do – it literally takes less than a minute – but I really do believe that that kind of intentional, loving communication with our kids reaps huge benefits. If you’ve ever written a note to your child(ren), you know that you can see the joy all over their face when they read it.
After the little guy and I talked for a few minutes about lunchbox notes, I had a hunch. Since field day was the last lunch I packed this past school year – and since he told me at the end of that day that he threw away all of his trash at school – I wondered if maybe he held onto the note when lunch was over. So I went in the pantry, pulled the lunchbox off the shelf, and sure enough, I found what I suspected that I would.
He kept it.
Bless his heart.
To celebrate the ways that moms connect with their kids over lunch – whether it’s by putting a note in a lunchbox or making special plans to sit in the backyard and eat sandwiches together – Smuckers has created a really neat program called Kidvitations. It’s a way for parents to intentionally make mealtimes special – and I think it’s awesome. I also think that you and your kids are going to love it.
If you’d like to enter to win a $200 Visa gift card, leave a comment and tell me one of your favorite ways to connect with the children in your life.
There are also BlogHer.com Smuckers roundup page.
And if you enjoy a little light reading, you’re sure to be delighted by the BlogHer.com Smuckers official rules.
This giveaway will run through August 23rd, at which point I’ll use random.org to select a winner.
Can’t wait to read your comments!
Create a Kidvitation!
Home can be a busy place with the hustle and bustle of everyday life. That’s why it’s important to set time aside to spend with your kids. Use Smuckers® Kidvitations to invite your kids to share a moment with you over a perfect PB&J. Check it out.
This giveaway is now closed.
well in this day and age its all about the random text lol
I love to lie in bed with the kids at the end of the day and just hear whatever they have to say. They’ll chit-chat for ages if I let them. I’ve heard some very interesting comments about school, friends, etc.
Although we’re long-distance, I try to keep up with the milestones in my goddaughter’s life — from swim meets to a new favorite color — whatever’s important in her world.
Praying over my kids after bedtime devotions are my favorite part of each day. I am so humbled that God chose me to be their mom, and speaking Life into their sweet little hearts is the very least I can do for them.
I love hearing them tell about their day at school. Talking forms a special kind of bond/connection between mother and child.
I spent time with them without the tv on!
Thanks for entering me! Great Contest!
Janna Johnson
janna@FeedYourPigBlog.com
jannajanna@hotmail.com
http://www.FeedYourPigBlog.com
I like to stick 1 hershey kiss in their lunch, its a little kiss from mom and tells them I love them…=)
My little guy is only 5 months old. My FAVORITE time to connect with him is during his bedtime bottle. He always falls asleep during or shortly after his bottle. I love watching him fall asleep, and snuggling with him for hours. It is not uncommon for us to sit in the rocker together for two hours after he falls asleep. I love and cherish our time together!
One of the best ways is the way my Mom did it for me. We’d go out to lunch together, just the two of us, when I was a young teenager. It made me feel grown up, special, and I had her complete attention.
My kids are no longer kids, but it’s still important to connect with them and help them make those tough decisions. I take them to lunch. They love the free meal and we have a nice face-to-face conversation to catch up.
Last year as a 1st grader, my daughter asked me to provide a written menu in her lunch. I do that with flowers and drawings and notes and she keeps every one of them.
I am sure this will sound strange to some or may even help others get re-connected with their twenty something year old college age children, but I connect with my 21 year old son by texting and facebook chats. When I started doing things in a way that he related to he started calling & visiting more often. I know that the internet can be a dangerous place for young people, but there are some positive things that come from it.
I love painting my girls’ nails. It gives us time to just sit and talk and be girly.
My 4 year old granddaughter LOVES mail. I send her letters, photos, cereal prizes, and freebies a few times a week. For the price of a stamp I get to envision her delight over a shampoo sample and she always calls to thank me.
smchester at gmail dot com
I play barbies with my niece and play hide and go seek! She loves that!
My son is 2, so I still have a ‘hold’ on him. My fav way to connect is by breastfeeding. 2nd fav is reading stories at night when I’m not at work. Thanks! thebubbledies(at)gmail(dot)com
Long car rides = long talks
Our kids love to cook, so we work together in the kitchen. The other day I forgot to make a casserole for a picnic and with their help we had it all put together and in the over in 7 minutes.
I love to sit my daughter up on the counter so she can watch while I cook. I let her “help” with tasks she can handle, and we have a wonderful time being a little silly together.
I love teaching my children to dance. The electric slide, macarena, chicken dance, hustle, etc. – they enjoy learning and they actually think I’m kinda cool for knowing them all.
Dinner time is always good for us. But individually, I take them on errands with me when. Those are the talks I remember most with my parents.
I connect with my son by being interested in his projects and listening to him talk about them.
Notes! but not just in the lunch box, they are all over the place. Everyday is like a scavenger hunt
When I tuck my son into bed at night, we talk about his day and he tells me all the fun things he did at preschool. This is when we catch up with each other and I love it!
Since my daughter is far away at college, we talk on the phone and e-mail frequently to stay in touch!
Even though my son is only 6 months – I make sure that I make meal times in his high chair special times with the two of us. I make funny faces or noises to make sure he smiles and try to give him my complete attention.
I can’t wait until I can leave notes in his lunch!
Our bedtime story-time is the time when I connect with my kids. Sometimes, I read to them, or they read tome, or we make up our own story.
Reading with my kids is how I connect
Each night we have family night for an hour or two. We do what the kids want to do. It maybe a game or an activity.
I like to be at my sister’s house when the kids come home from school. As they sit at the counter eating their afternoon snack, I regale them with a retelling of stories and events that have occurred recently or in the past but have some comedic value. If I haven’t any stories, I can always dance for them. They seem to find that equally hysterical.
We love to take our boys to their favorite restaurant and eat together and laugh and talk about whatever is on their minds.
We love snuggling on the couch with a good book.
My kids really love doing devotions together as a family. If for some reason, we miss, they always ask. I think it just shows them its important to be together AS A FAMILY and talk, not just watch movies or be together, but actually talk together.
When I was growing up my mother went to great lengths to make sure we all ate dinner together. If Dad worked late, we waited for him to come home to eat. During football and baseball season, we all ate afterwards together. If it was going to be a really late night, we would eat at a normal dinner time, but when everyone got home, we all ended up around the table eating cereal or dessert while Dad ate his dinner. I find myself doing the same thing with my family as my kids are growing up.
My children and grandchildren are all adults, but my pantry functions as a snack aisle for them, and they often stop by just to have a talk. I treasure the fact that they want to spend time with me, and I think they enjoy it.
I’m in the car for 45 minutes with my kids on the way to school in the morning, and 45 minutes in the afternoon.
That’s ninety minutes of precious time for me and my kids without any distractions of TV, friends coming over, or cleaning.
I have a rule when the kids get in the car: I ask them to tell me three things they liked about their day. I don’t care if it’s as simple as, “I really liked what you packed for lunch” or “I had fun playing outside today”. It’s just a moment for my kids to think about the GOOD things that happened during their day, and I am always amused by what they loved about their day.
My kids are all young adults with busy lives of their own. Lame as it sounds, we text a lot to keep in touch. And the one on the other end of the country reads my blog. Isn’t that sad and precious at the same time?
I try to take them out one on one and just listen to them. No phones, tv’s, etc. Just communication.
Read and talk in bed every night, pray together. Also have dinner together as a family at least 4 nights a week.
Reading to them at bedtime or playing silly games.
Reading together and cuddling at night before bed. Such sweet time!
I feel like I connect with my kids in many ways, but my favorite (and theirs, too) is something we call “Date Day”. The first Sunday of the month each parent takes one child on a special date—whatever they want to do that day. The next month, we take the other child. It’s funny, because sometimes we end up at the same places as the other parent/child!
I love taking my kids on “dates”! They get to choose where we go and what we do. I’m always amazed at how much they open up during this one-on-one time!
The kids and I enjoy packing a lunch, and the we have a picnic sitting in the middle of our trampoline!
I take my older son out on Mama-Son date nights. Since we had the new baby, I d on’t get as much time with him as before and I want him to have my undivided attention on these “date nights”. Plus it’s good practice for when he’s older. I teach him to open doors, pull out chairs and even give him the money to “pay” for the meal. It’s very sweet.
I love to read to my children, and I have daily devotions with the before bedtime each night.
Meals together, post-its on the bathroom mirror, conversation in the car to and from school.
Connecting with my kids is my passion. I’m always looking for ways to do so… simple, yet creative.
My husband and I started individually dating our children (now 19, 16 and 13) when they were very young. It might be a movie, breakfast, a fishing trip, an overnight camping trip, etc., but we wrote it in INK on our calendar and we dated each child once a month.
If it was a particularly busy month, it might just be a bedtime milkshake (taking the child in their pajamas to a drive-thru and ordering a small milkshake before bedtime)… but we always tried to make the dates.
As I said, they are 19, 16 and 13 now, and we are still “dating” them. It is the best.
And it doesn’t take the place of our family time… Family Movie Night once a month; Family Game Night once a month; Family Camping Trips; at least THREE or FOUR family meals together during the week, etc.
And it doesn’t take away from me and the hubby. We try to have at least one date a month, too.
Putting it on the calendar in INK is so important.
long talks with plenty of time and NO interruptions!
The hours we spent in the car going back and forth to swim team practice. A lot of happy memories of talking, laughing , singing, silly times!
I like to connect with my kids at bedtime. We hug and kiss and I tell them something I’m proud of them for, from that day. I love sending them to bed with good things in their ears.
My mom used to write notes on my napkins and put them in my lunch box. My daughter is just learning to read so I can’t wait to start. I also try to put sweet treats in – yesterday it was a smarties for my smartie!
I love talking with them at bedtime…sometimes we just laugh about the silly things that happened during the day and sometimes the serious stuff on their hearts comes out.
At bedtime, each of our girls *ages 6, 4, 2) has a special hymn that we sing with her and then a song with her name in it and then we all take turns praying.
Reading books together at bedtime.
I am still pretty new to the mommy stuff since Will is only 18 months old BUT I have found special ways to have that sweet time with him. Right now we are SO into books and have our little ritual of him climbing in my lap to read books all day long. I get cuddle time that I will ALWAYS treasure while he gets that special time of reading that he has loved for as long as I can remember. Sure hope he is loving the cuddle time too though!!
I love to make cookies with my girls!! And they love it, too. :) Win- win.
And for the life of me, I can’t remember if I’ve already commented on this giveaway, so forgive me if this is a duplicate entry.
Life gets so busy sometimes we all end up in different places. But just sitting at the table coloring with my daughter opens up lots of serious and good conversations. After we talk I always feel so connected to her.
With a new baby in the house my older boys don’t get as much attention as they used to. I try to make a point to cuddle or wrestle with them a little every day. They eat up the attention! It’s also a great time to tell them how much I love them and what amazing little boys they are!
my landry and i play beauty shop. a little blush and lip gloss and a sassy hair do! she loves it and it is one of the only times she sits still enough to let me love on her squishy cheeks and chubby little arms. *tear*
I’m finding it hard to really connect with my kids, 13 & 15. Their busy schedules, school, homework, soccer, friends, and my running the transportation to and from leaves us with little time during the school year to “connect”. I try to spend one-on-one time with them each night before bed. I sometimes send them an encouraging text message or leave them a fun note on Facebook.
My daughter is having a rough time transitioning back to school. First grade is rough! So, last night, I got out big buckets of water and towels and soap and I gave her a pedicure with lots of foot rubbing. She fell asleep much more relaxed last night.
We pack lunches together and I like to write notes in them. After school we play Mario brothers or go to the park together. :)
my mom used to put notes on my napkins, usually with a red sharpie, and i saved every one, too.
until we moved out of the house we grew up when i was in college after my parents got divorced. then she just told me to purge everything because her new townhouse was too small for it all.
thanks, mom.
it really was special for me, though. if i had had the sense to say it, it was special for the reason alex told you it was special to him.
i only have my sweet niece, hannah grace, and i connect with her by painting when she wants to paint and talking a short little walk with her after dinner each night.
but the main thing i do is, earlier this summer, i started telling her the story of when she was born while i was putting her to bed and we were laying in the dark one night. i would stroke her arm and tell the same story…which has become our tradition every night since then. she even likes it better than when her mom, my sister, tells it.
she is a fast little thing, always playing and screaming and dancing, so when we can slow down, i love just having those sweet, still moments with her.
xo
I love it when right when my 8 year old boy is supposed to turn out the light and go to sleep looks up at me and says “Mom, can we cuddle?” Sure, I know it’s a delay tactic, but the time we share together talking about our day is so precious.
Everyday I ask my kids the best thing that happened to them, and the worst thing. Also, we enjoy our bedtime routine.
The best way is the dinner table…and love notes in their lunches.
I love to leave little notes. I will put them under their pillows, in my daughters ballet shoes, in my sons baseball hat. I’ll write on the mirror in the bathroom so that when they take a shower it will show up. Even more than that I make it a point to hug them both daily and tell them how much I love them.
Go on walks or bike rides together.
I recall finding a note I wrote and put in my son’s lunchbox in his dresser drawer weeks later. I smiled thinking, “He didn’t just read it . . . he saved it!” Now that he’s 19 I look back on those days of packing lunches and sending sweet notes as priceless.
I love reading to them!! I also love to snuggle with them in the mornings!!
I love going on nature walks and other outdoor exploring adventures with the kids in my life and watching their imaginations run wild!
We read together. :) It’s my favorite time of the day.
I love to connect with my kids by taking the time out to sit with them and read books or play a favorite game. I think that one on one time is very important.
I have no kids of my own =( but my own mother would put notes in my lunchbox and I LOVED it!!! I would so do that too! …if I had kids…maybe I’ll do it for my husband!! ha!
I am a big fan of reading at bedtime and turning off the TV to talk about the day at dinner.
I really enjoy teaching my kids so I homeschool. That keeps us very connected!
Stories at bedtime! Never underestimate a story with your kids.
You made me cry. Ruby’s first day of pre-school is next week, and I’m starting to feel a little unsure about all of this big kid sorta stuff.
You reminded me to pick up some cute stationary for her lunch notes. :) Thank you.
My favorite way to connect with her? In the car. We sing, we play games, we tell stories, we talk about life. I’ve got her strapped in, and I’ve got her in a captive audience. :) It’s precious.
Our favorite connection time of the day is every night at the end of the day we lay down together in the bed to read a story!
Dinners together at the kitchen table. Also, one on one time with each one each week.
mail is a great idea… whether it’s a postcard to a distant niece or nephew or a note in a lunch box, mail never fails.
although it’s no replacement for cuddling.
I have teenagers, and talking to them while they are “trapped” LOL in the car with you on the way to/from sports practices is a good way to find out what is going on with them. I also don’t allow them to play video games or listen to ipods when they are in the front seat with me. Got to get creative as they get older =)
T.I.M.E.
Playing Wii – not one of my favorites.
Shopping – both of our favorites.
Asking Questions – I love to hear what my darling daughter has to say, and all the little people I am blessed to have in my life.
Love sitting around the table and talk about the best/worst part of our days. Especially as the kids are gone during the day at school it allows all of us to talk about what is really going on.
I like the times when we have all the “technology” turned off and are doing something as a family. We actually talk to each other and work together during those things and a lot of them are outside jobs so the sunshine is a nice bonus. Those are the times I get some of my best picture memories too:)
I love to connect with my girls while “treasure hunting” at the charity shops:)
I recently started keeping a mother-daughter journal with each of my daughters in which we take turns writing to each other. The little one can’t write much yet, so it’s more a record of what we talk about.
with our 6 month old we love our evening playtime and bathtime routine before bed. I’m home with him all day but it’s a sweet time in the evening when we’re all together as a family.
Since my kids are teenagers, I use their social networking sites to let them know that I am proud of them and that I love them. That way, their friends see how loved they are as well. Surprisingly, they aren’t embarrassed at all!
Going to events in our City park.
Finding the time to spend time with each one (of the children in my class) individually, and knowing what their “love language” is. Obviously, words mean alot to your Alex. A hug might mean more to another kid, etc. When they are all sitting and eating, it’s easy to do this!
My girls like to take turns helping me cook. If they cook it, it tastes better to them and we have lots of fun!
My kids are little (3 and 1) but I have taken to setting aside the time when the baby takes his nap to have special snuggle one on one time with my daughter. Usually we read books, but today she asked me all about outer space, so we googled hubble telescope pictures and she snuggled up to me at the lap top and we oohed and aaahed at God’s creation.
I love family meal time and talking about the best and worst of the day. I love talking with them in the car as well, some of our better conversations have happened that way.
My husband and I connect with our children by eating dinner as a family and chit chat about the day. My youngest likes to play card and board games, but my oldest doesn’t. I put lunch box notes in my youngest daughters lunch for school.
My little one is only 6 months old, so our special time is nursing!
I send them emails and e-notes.
Laying on the trampoline after dark looking at the stars and talking… that’s awesome.
I love to read my daughter a story while she eats a “little dessert” right before bed. It’s a cute tradition we’ve had going for a while now.