Right this very second I’m sitting down and waiting for the latest installment of “24.” And I’m waiting for it, of course, because our social calendar is jam-packed with a whole lot of absolutely nothing and because last week’s episode ended with Jack being chased by a hitman and then saving himself at the last minute by tricking the hitman into thinking that he was hiding in an abandoned shed and then demolishing the shed with a bulldozer that happened to be parked nearby.
It was all utterly believable. I mean, I don’t know about y’all, but the using-nearby-bulldozers-for-shed-demolition thing happens to me ALL THE TIME.
However, the “24” stuff is really neither here nor there because I have to tell you a far more inspirational story, one that will leave you so fraught with emotion that it may require some tissues. Or, at the very least, a Deeply Sincere Single Tear.
This afternoon I ran in the Walmarts to pick up a few things, and as I was walking over to the grocery section a sale rack caught my eye. Now you need to realize that at the beginning of the year I decided that my theme for 2009 was being faithful in the small things, so I haven’t done any clothes shopping in the last couple of months. Our budget is pretty tight right now, so back in January Melanie and I decided that we would hold each other accountable in terms of impulse purchases. If either of us has a Shopping Moment of Weakness, we call the other one and explain what’s going on, and that is why as recently as two weeks ago you might have seen me in the Targets talking to Mel on my phone while longingly resting my head against some colorful long tunics.
Sadly, there was no room for a sassy tunic in my budget. I had to say good-bye. And I may have whispered “I love you” as I walked away.
Don’t even get me started about the remarkable restraint I showed in the Steinmarts when they had baskets of sunglasses marked down to $9.99 a pair.
So today I saw the Walmarts sales rack, and it was filled with all manner of cute empire-waist cotton dresses. You could wear a long-sleeved or a short-sleeved shirt underneath, and I’ve had my eye on that particular style of dress since I first saw them in another store last spring. The sale dresses were a little below knee-length, so I pulled one off the rack to check out the price.
(For some reason this whole dress thing makes me think of Martha because I know that if she were here right now she’d say, “Is it a thin cotton? Or a thicker cotton? I think that thin cotton is darlin’, just darlin’, but I just freeze every time I wear it because you know they keep the church so cold that you can’t possibly sit there without a light sweater, at the very least a light sweater, and even then the thin cotton just isn’t enough and I need a thicker cotton, you know like on the Susan Bristol separates? The Susan Bristol separates are a thicker cotton and sometimes I don’t even need a sweater when I wear them, I don’t even need a sweater! Now did you happen to go to Goody’s?”)
Anyway. I looked at the price, and do y’all know how much those dresses were? DO YOU KNOW?
THEY WERE TWO DOLLARS.
$2.
TWO! DOLLARS!
I immediately threw a purple one and a brown one into my shopping cart, and I called Mel to make sure that spending four dollars on two dresses still fell under the category of being faithful in the small things. In addition to giving me her purchase seal of approval (“WHY, YOU COULD BUY THOSE WITH THE CHANGE IN YOUR WALLET,” she said excitedly), she proceeded to rattle off a list of all the different colors of jewelry I could wear with them. And then she said she might have to run over to her Walmarts, too. The $2 dresses don’t come along every day, you know?

It is perfectly fine if you feel compelled to bask in their $2 cuteness.
And I will wear the fire out of that $2 cuteness this summer, by the way.
Plus, I think the dresses will be extraordinarily comfortable when I hop in all the bulldozers to demolish all the sheds.
Jack Bauer would be so proud.


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