I’m pretty private about my blog. I have only told my close friends and family, I don’t put my real name on here, I haven’t told our friends at church about it – and you can ask me why all you want to, but the bottom line is that it’s hard for me to explain. It may have something to do with the fact that I don’t like to talk about what I’ve written – I write it down, and I read the comments, and I move on. The few times that I have been around people who were talking about what I’ve written, I was so uncomfortable that I can’t even articulate it. I wanted to crawl under the floor and stay there until The Blog Talk stopped (so yes, Emma Kate, THANK YOU for bringing it up in front of our friends who didn’t know the other night. That was a lot of fun for me).
Another aspect of my blog secrecy is that I’m a little afraid that I’ll tell somebody – maybe someone from church – and they’d read it and I’d run into them later and ask if they read it and they’d say, “Um. I. Uh. Yeah. I read it.” And then the deafening silent disapproval would consume me.
ANYWAY, a couple of days ago a friend of ours mentioned that a former staff member at our church has a blog. D. found it, bookmarked it, and when I finally got around to reading it, there were links to eight or nine people from church who also blog. None of the people are close friends of mine – just people I chat with on Sundays, or speak to when we’re getting our kids from the nursery, or work with on a project from time to time.
So you can probably imagine what I’ve been doing all afternoon…it’s like there’s a whole new planet in my blogging universe. And I kind of want to comment on their sites – because now I feel free to tell them about mine – but is that invading their privacy somehow? Why do I feel like I need to be invited? Why is this so much weirder when dealing with people you know than it is when dealing with people you don’t know?
Could I possibly be more paranoid?
BooMama, you’re so cute. I highly doubt you’ll EVER find someone who doesn’t love your blog.
You’re right though, it is weirder with people you know. I don’t tell most people either. If they don’t blog, they don’t get it and I don’t know anyone in real life that blogs. I think you should just comment, I bet they will be happy you did.
I was JUST discussing this on my blog! I took months to “out” myself and I did it by accident. Then that freind told all my online freinds…. before I knew it I had like people (Ha! 5 ) reading what I type. Kinda wierd.
Love your Blog! Come on over and visit me sometime!
I’m SO with you on this BM…I know my Mom’s reads on mine on occasion, she’s in Ohio and I get all uptight when she starts the phone conversation with, “I read your blog at work the other day…” my heart starts to race and I my blood pressure starts to rise. Because I have no idea what she’s going to say.
And, when I find out someone who is reading my blog and I didn’t know they were before I get all wierd for some reason. My advice would be to be a “lurker” for awhile and then if a post is just itchin’ at the seams for you to comment then do so! Especially, since all good comments can never be a bad thing.
Well – after reading this twice I still dont know exactly what to comment. I don’t know you – just feel like I do a little teeny bit, and am pretty confident I’d like you if we met. Your blog is, after those 99 I’m related to who blog, one of the ones I just dont miss. I like it so much I want to go back and read your archives. You are a treat to read, but maybe you being hesitant to share it is part of what makes your writing so great – since it reflects you. Use me as a reference, I think its great!
Hmmmmm…..Is it maybe because you feel more accountable to those you’re acquainted with in real life? Acquainted but they don’t love you like your close friends and family who love you warts and all? I know, it’s just different to me, too. For instance, we’re 3 states apart, and there’s not much chance of us meeting in real life, so there’s a kind of buffer zone there. Am I making sense at all? I think I’ll just shut up now. Anyway, I’ve come to love you and appreciate you from 3 states away, BooMama. :)
as the others have said – your blog is something to be proud of – but you know not proud in a bad way. LOL It is brilliant!
But it is an odd thing in the face to face world. I have felt odd afterI told a few of my non-blogging friends about it. Some have checked it out – others not. But I know they don’t “get” it. They think I am nuts and/or wasting my time. But if I found friends (in person I mean) that blogged, I think it would be cool to blgo with them too. But then you must be careful to never slam people you know. (I try to never do this anyway, for many reasons)
I think your blog is awesome and I have to agree with Lauren. Why not comment on the blogs you know the faces.:)
You have nothing to hide – you always have such encouraging stories.
I agree, it’s a little weird. I’m like Theresa, it’s the non-blogger’s who read (and often don’t comment) that kinda weird me out. I didn’t tell people I knew about my blog, except for other Grace bloggers who have me linked on their blogs. A couple of them are in more prominent ministry positions, and now use their blogs as a way to communicate to people at church. They will often put their blog address in publications they distribute. Well, my blog is more personal, and sometimes I worry that people are getting a wrong impression of me after reading my blog. Like they’re not getting a 3-D view of me, but more of a flat, 1 dimensional perspective. I now have had several people at church say, “I Love your blog.” And that makes me feel a little odd. I have to remind myself that people I know are reading it.
So if you start commenting on their site, know that they will probably love to hear from you, of course they will love your blog (who doesn’t) and link to you. Once that happens there will be people that you know, watching you (generally quietly, not commenting.) I’ve even had a couple of people who no longer go to the church, haven’t in years and years, don’t agree with the church, let me know they’ve read my blog. It’s always been positive, like, “I enjoy reading” or “I saw that you had another baby, congratulations”, but it freaks me out nonetheless.
There’s one woman at church, who will frequently say to me, “I just love how you’re so honest on your blog. You don’t really care what people think. You are yourself.” Now that might seem like a compliment. But what I hear is, “You are one totally messed up person, who’s sharing it with the entire world on your blog. What a freak!”
However, I have also had really positive things happen because people I know are reading my blog. Several people have told me that what I wrote encouraged them in some way. And as someone who enjoys writing, that feels REALLY GOOD.
So I go back and forth between wanting to close down shop and start a new secret blog that only my husband knows about, and being really proud of some of the things I’ve written.
I know I’ve typed up a whole post here in your comments, sorry. You’ve obviously hit a nerve with me. :-)
This is akin to singing in the shower or trying out for American Idol. I think it all depends on how “exposed” you want to be.
When it comes to commenting, I think most bloggers would love to get comments from anyone, but maybe espeically from people they know. And I’ll tell you why I say that: Over the last few months I have found out that SEVERAL people at church have been reading my blog (one of whom is my pastor!!!) That’s fine, because I don’t post about things that I wouldn’t say in real life.
BUT, it makes me feel bad when I hear that people I know are reading but not commenting, because blogging IS one-dimensional. As real and honest as we may try to be, there is always so much left out of the picture that a reader never learns about us. (There are things I would say in a private conversation that I would never say on my blog.) And, my initial thoughts about something are often altered after discussing things and considering others’ points of view.
These things sadden me because I think the people we know IRL are the people God has given us to interact with in all three dimensions, so to speak. But when they read and don’t engage in the discussion (either on the blog or IRL,) it hinders that kind of interaction, and leaves them with a false sense of who I am.
Hope that made sense.
I invited a friend from work to read my blog, showed her how to find it, and that day’s post was my rant about forwarded emails. I checked my email later that day, and she had sent me one of those forwards (make a wish and say a prayer)! I thought, OMG she must have thought I wanted her to read that because of the email. How embarrassing! I went to her and explained that I hadn’t seen her email when I wrote it and that it wasn’t directed at her, and she said she hadn’t taken it personally. Whew! That was a close one.