There was actually a secondary plot line that unfolded during our recent trip to McDonald’s, but I didn’t write about it at the time because I believe deep down in my soul that a sausage patty should always receive blogging priority.
I mean, wouldn’t you agree that fried pork trumps, well, everything?
So D, Alex and I were enjoying our Saturday morning breakfast when a guy walked in McD’s with his two young sons who looked to be about five and three. The sweet daddy had his hands full, no doubt about it, and I say that because at one point he had to abandon ordering their food so that he could chase down the older boy who apparently had sensed a window of opportunity and made a break for the playground.
Meanwhile, there was a woman sitting a couple of tables away from us, and it only took us a few minutes to figure out that She Meant Business in regards to her McDonald’s visit. She had her purse, keys and cell phone lined up on one side of the table and a stack of newspapers on the other. She sipped coffee as she worked not one but two crossword puzzles, and every time there was the slightest unexpected noise – like a fryer beeping or a door slamming – she looked up from her crossword puzzle and glowered in the direction of the interruption.
As the man with the two boys made his way back to the counter after physically removing his older child from the playground doorframe, he started trying to place his order again, but something – who knows what – sent his younger child into an absolute tantrum. The child was wailing at the top of his lungs, and I really wasn’t paying much attention because if motherhood has given me anything, it’s the ability to almost completely block out high-pitched screaming. I did notice the father trying to calm down his son, but the boy would have nothing to do with calm. It was a full-on breakdown.
After about thirty seconds of listening to the little boy’s screaming, the woman with the crossword puzzles slammed down her pencil, turned her head in the direction of the outburst and said, in a surprisingly harsh tone, “NOW THAT! IS JUST! COMPLETELY! UNCALLED FOR!”
And then she looked at D and me like she wanted us to second the motion.
Little did she know that, as someone who has watched her child SLAP A COMPLETE STRANGER in the paper plate aisle of Party City, I’m not really in a position to cast temper-tantrum stones. Sometimes kids have meltdowns. And my heart was with that daddy who was trying to convince his three year-old to pull it together.
After about a minute, the little boy finally regained his composure, and the daddy took both boys outside to enjoy their breakfast on the playground. He probably thought he’d be a little safer from Crossword Lady’s glares if they had a wall between them. Can’t say that I blamed him.
Because I can’t help but think if that lady was looking for a serene place where she could work her crossword puzzles on a balmy summer morning, McDonald’s might not be her best bet. Odds are that an eating establishment with lots of young children and stacks of pancakes with syrup and a large assortment of sugar-laden beverages is not really an ideal location for some quiet puzzle-solving time.
Maybe it’s just me, but I have a little theory that the next time Crossword Lady really wants to concentrate on the solution to 45 across, she might want to find her a table at, oh, THE LIBRARY.
I hear it’s super quiet there.
Perhaps this is because they do not serve Coke from a fountain, nor do they have milkshakes.
And also: they do not have a playground.
HAHA!!
You crack me up. By the way I got to meet faithful chick the other day (one of our blogging siestas) and we were talking about you. Laughing our heads off at some of the posts you have written!!
Keep it coming – we love it!
Kim
Nope, I’m afraid she’s now taking her puzzles to the chairs beside the Thomas the TankEngine table at the BAM in Hoover.
I used to glower in the direction of the interruption when I would do my college paper’s daily crossword, but those professors just wouldn’t stop talking!
The old heifer was probably by herself working crossword puzzles because she was so sour and bitter nobody would have her. Otherwise she’d have been through the tantrum thing and have been a bit more understanding.
I think I’m done now. :-)
Have I mentioned that it’s been just a tad HOTTER THAN BLUE BLAZES here lately? And there in AL too, I know. Bless your hearts, keep that AC blasting, S and Sister.
Love and hugs,
Diane
Going to McDonald’s for peace and quiet is like buying feta cheese for its pleasant smell – it’s just not there.
Heaven help us all if kids can’t be crazy in a McDonald’s.
And you nailed the hierarchy of blog priorities, shown here in descending order:
1) Fried pork
2) Any type of fried food – or – pork
3) Anecdotes about people or life events
Reminds me of the elderly lady I was chatting with, after church, who–after my baby let out a yelp–said to me: “Kids just weren’t that loud when *I* was a young mom.”
Mmm-hmmmm.
SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD TURN DOWN YOUR HEARING AID, I wanted to shout.
But I didn’t.
Amen, sister!
My friends and I had an experience at a Burger King a couple of years ago when some older ladies were commenting on our brood. One of my friends overheard one of the ladies say something to the effect of “my children never made that much noise”. My friends and I came to the conclusion that there children were noisy, they just didn’t realize it because at the time, they were TUNING THEM OUT, as all parents often do.
It’s a defense mechanism, really.
We also marveled at how they might have missed the towering play area on the front of the building as they were walking in for their “quiet” lunch.
As for the crossword lady? I think she needs to be blessed by a couple of precious angels of her own, like PRONTO!
Gosh, you’d think the giant clown dressed in primary colors would’ve been a tip off that this just might be a place where those kid-thingys gather!
Oh, that’s funny! On another note, but not entirely off topic, my 4 year old son, Max, asked if he could get a sausage with his happy meal this week.
Is he sneaking down in his footie pajamas in the middle of the night to read Boomama?
Wow, drama at the McDonalds!! That and a sausage patty too. What more could you ask for?? Seriously, I really can’t believe that lady chose MCDONALDs to have a quiet cup of coffee. What’s up with that??
Thanks for sharing this. I hope all those who have ever glared at a young mother or father with a child engaged in a full-blown tantrum will remember to use some good common sense and look the other way. I don’t know about your McD’s, but ours is within walking distance of a very lovely Starbucks. Crossword Lady could have thorougly enjoyed a really, really good cup-o-joe in a mostly toddler-free setting if she’d chosen wisely. (Okay, I realize I need to stop now. I just know that I take my precious four yr. old to McDonald’s with the intention of letting him run wild and burn off some of his excessive energy. It’s his all-time favorite place in the world.)
Oh I am laughing with my dear friend Alana. Must have been the same lady in Burger King a couple of years ago!
The library is a perfect place for a crossword.
You are so right! How rude of her to even comment! You know, if she could just one time walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. You just never know what people are going thru.
I agree, send Miss Have-No-Life-So-I-Work-Crossword-Puzzles-at-McDonalds to the library!
“I mean, wouldn’t you agree that fried pork trumps, well, everything?”
Everything except green tomatoes and pickles. :)
I know the crossword lady. I’m related to someone like just like her.
Closely related.
And I think Cross-word lady is just the right name for her, no?
MyBestInvest: My friend and I call it ‘feeta’ cheese. Yum.
Oh, and Crossword Lady abides in every place a child has a tantrum.
Not that I have been affronted by her. Because, well, princesses don’t HAVE tantrums. And I am raising 3 princesses.
Who also don’t poot.
Nah – it’s my kids throwing tantrums at the library. They really love me there.
HA! Poor guy.
We always have lunch at Mazzio’s on Tuesday – except for last Tuesday, which was probably God’s way of keeping my foot out of my mouth.
This past Tuesday, my two best friends and their children (that would be a total of five children under the age of six) got thrown out of Mazzio’s because fellow customer complained to the manager that “This isn’t Chuck E. Cheese.” Granted, my friends and the cranky lady were about the only people in the place because commuter towns clear out at lunchtime – so why CrankPot was sitting RIGHT NEXT to a table of FIVE children when she could have seated herself on the other side of the establishment is beyond me.
So, now, we are trying to decide if we should brave Mazzio’s next Tuesday – three women and eight under five. Hmmm….
some people are just mean. and that’s all i have to say about that.
I remember a time in our lives when we would be at a nice resturant and a child would have a melt down. We would all look each other in the eye, and then all rise together and leave. Now that we have a child that occasionaly has melt downs at nice resturants we still look each other in the eye and then request the to go cartons. No sense in ruining everyones meal.
Having no children myself, I must admit that, while I’ve never MADE A COMMENT, I’ve rolled my eyes. Why can’t these people just CONTROL THEIR CHILDREN? I would think. And then my nephew went DEFCON-1 on me over a pack of gum, and it all became clear. Turns out – and wait for it, because I’m about to BLOW YOUR MIND – children are PEOPLE. With opinions. And the little ones? No power to reason. At all. And I have to admit, I have my days where throwing myself on the floor and convulsing around in the manner of a hurricane wearing flip flops doesn’t seem like the worst idea in the world.
You are too funny–and so descriptive. I believe Cross word Puzzle lady was sitting right there at our McDs back in the day when my three and five year old boys were pitching fits. She didn’t like it then either! Oh well, at least they outgrew their unpleasant behaviors!
Oh bless that daddy’s heart. Chasing down kids and physically removing them from doorframes?
That’s me, like um, EVERYDAY!
Clearly–clearly–she has never spent a day with anyone under the age of ten, never had any babysitting jobs as a teenager, and needless to say, never raised a child. Because we all know that any “Why can’t that person just control their child already??” thoughts are completely banished, never to be heard from again, the first time we take an infant, who is not asleep, out of the house.
Why do things like this NEVER happen when I am around! Thanks for a good laugh! I remember saying “My kids will NEVER act like that” and now I am frequently eating my words. God has a funny little way of humbling us sometimes, doesn’t He! Have a great Friday!
I think I’ve met Crossword Puzzle Lady. She was the same lady that gave me a dirty look when my kid knocked over the paper towel display at the grocery store. I feel sure it was same lady because surely there is only enough room in this world for one judgmental, up tight, I’m sure very nice if you caught her at the right time of day, lady. Great story, but I’m glad that the sausage patty won out over the Crossword lady.
I actually take my kids to the library once a week so Crossword Lady should watch out…we can make even the library sound like a McDonald’s playland!
And the loudest one of all?
Why, it’s me, yelling “SSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!”
Too bad she’s not the stranger that “Howard” slapped on the paper plate aisle. Oh, did I just say that out loud?
I mean it sounds like she needed a hug. From the sticky, syrup drenched, jacked up on mountain dew kids from the McD playground.
ohhh, boomama!
did howard hear the crotchedy-word puzzle lady?
because goodness knows if we had been in mcd’s, my two would have heard her, and, surprise of surprises, one of mine would probably said something to her, which would have caused me to “fall out” under the table.
funny how kids can sense when “grown-ups” don’t like little kids.
maybe she was wishing she had a MAN to buy her an extra sausage patty! ;o)
Poor little woman. Probably lives in her own imaginary world where children can be controlled by one look from daddy.
And poor, poor Daddy. He was probably just trying to get the boys out of Mama’s hair for the morning and he had to deal with the mean words and stares from Evil Crossword Puzzle Lady.
Oh, I hate her and I don’t even know her!
You’ve been tagged!
I used to BE (a much cuter, perkier, younger version of) the Crossword Lady! Until I had Bean. Needless to say, I have rehabilitated myself.
When I see some poor parent with a less than ruley child in a store I usually:
1)immediately have pity
2)THANK GOD IN HEAVE IT”S NOT ME–this time!
I was living in a parallel world at the IHOP on Saturday morning, except my kids were the ones getting glared at as the waiter had the audacity to seat us next to a man who wanted to eat his pancakes and read his newspaper in silence. In the IHOP. On Saturday morning. Amongst the chocolate chip pancakes. Yeah right.
Here in the greater Knox agroplex we have a DQ with a lego table but that’s pretty darn close to a McD’s w/playground, right? And no one in their right would ever venture into the DQ on a Saturday morning for peace & quiet, oh wait actually you could get peace & quiet on Sat morning at DQ because they don’t serve breakfast but you might get arrested for breaking and entering so maybe not such a good idea…Nearest McD’s is 75 miles but if doing two crossword puzzles is that important to you then time and gas $$ are no object right? Send on the crazy crossword lady…
I sat behind “Cross-word” man on a flight from Los Angeles to Atlanta. He and his wife slept the WHOLE way home. As we were decending into Atlanta, my eighteen month old did not take kindly to sitting in the up right position with her seat belt securely fastened and she had a melt down. It did not matter that for five hours I had put on a show and let her pull large chunks of hair out of my head to keep her quiet. He turned to his wife and said “Now that is an advertisement for birth control”. I stood up over the seat and told him I was thankful they would not be passing the ugly gene onto future generations.
I’ve learnt that people like that are just plain clueless unless they had kids themselves. I used to feel bad if my kids were being, well kids, but I don’t anymore. It’s quite liberating really.
Oh and “wouldn’t you agree that fried pork trumps, well, everything?” I would. When my hubby married me he had no idea that it is a tradition in my family to serve (fried) Garlic Pork with Christmas breakfast. The first year that my mama made it he was utterly disgusted and wouldn’t touch it. I was like “What kind of MAN have I married!??”
I still eat it. He doesn’t.
(Here’s the recipe: http://www.caribbeanchoice.com/recipes/recipe.asp?recipe=493)
I was at a restaurant once and there was a young (very young) couple there with a newborn. They had just ordered their food when that sweet baby started screaming. And screaming. The new mom was trying everything to get him to calm down. After about 5 minutes of this, an elderly man stood up and yelled “GET THAT SCREAMING BABY OUT OF HERE!!!” The young mom started to cry, they got their food to go and left. I felt so bad for her. I remember what that was like, wanting so badly to make the crying stop. And, I wanted to punch that old man right in the eye.
Why do people think they can act like that?
I used to be crossword lady. Why can’t those people control their kids? REALLY! How Rude!
Yeah, then I had my own kids.
One day Crossword Lady will be reformed.
God has a way of humbling us right where it hurts. Like giving us, previously judgmental single people, temper tantrum throwing kids. :o)
Well bless everyone’s collective heart who was there. I kept thinking to myself, “Why in the world did that woman not go to Starbucks??”
Then it dawned on me…
It had to be the allure of pork…
I want to find that mean old lady and mess up BOTH of her stinkin’ crossword puzzles!
When we lived in Maine and both my boys were under the age of 4, there was a time I felt that sort of condemnation from other moms–moms who were happily wheeling their little angelic girls around Walmart in a shopping cart. Men would always smile at me as I soldiered down the isles, one boy crying IN the cart, one boy attached to the side of the cart, a la Bob the Builder, in FULL BATMAN COSTUME, shouting, “evil doers beware!” to everyone we passed. But the other moms? Vicious, cold stares, like my boys and I had the plague. And I, being the sweet Christian that I am, used to wish we DID have the plague and that I could somehow infect their little angelic girls with a little of our screaming Batman buggie syndrome.
Oh, I think it would have taken every ounce of my strength to not say something snarky to her. And I’m not usually one to make snarky comments to people!
One wonders at what age to we get to give up all the manners that were taught to us as children and be rude, rude, rude to people?
That’s probably the same lady who sat two rows behind me in the theatre last week who gave a scene by scene breakdown of the movie to her friend on the cell phone for the entire length of the movie. Whatever…as long as it didn’t inconvenience HER. Because, she IS the most important human being in the universe…you DO realize that, don’t you?
I always sympathize with anoyone dealing with a tantrum..’cause I’ve been there myself oh so many times. I also am very much in the habit of naming people like Crossword Lady. We have Pool Lady, Plate Man and Fat Carl in our neighborhood, not to mention Goober, Spacemaker and Haggle Man at daycare.
I am sorry, I could just laugh at this!
The thing she should have seen was that this was a dad taking time to spend with his kids! More dads should try it sometime!!
God bless,
Sallie
I feel sorry for the dad. If there is anything I’ve learned with my 4 kids, you never go in to order food – always go thru the drive thru & then walk in an “orderly” way to the playground LOL. That lady had issues… ‘nuf said. Have a super day!
I’m dissenting here….it’s my pet peeve when a child acts up and the parent rewards them anyway. Congratulations you’ve just taught your child how to get anything they want. I mean its ridiculous to expect silence in a mcdonalds at any time let alone on a sat morning, but when I’m in a steakhouse at 1130 and someone is letting their toddler scream for an hour? Darn right I’m going to say something. I asked the waitress rather loudly if we could move to another table because “there’s something the matter with this one” hehe. And for all you who are saying right now…”well she’s not a parent” I am and I most certainly would not reward tantrums with mcdonalds, one scream and we’re out of there. I’m not denigrating anyone’s parenting but its JMO.
This is not really in the same vein, but once when my sister and I were young and in gymnastics class, one of the other little girls started to throw a tantrum. Her grandmother, who was apparently on babysitting duty for the day, looked the girl in the eyes and said “Stop being so anti-social!” Scolding is a bit more effective when the recipient doesn’t have to look up the meaning in the dictionary, don’t you think? Great stoy, by the way :)
I was in K Mart a few weeks ago and could hear the intense and extremely loud screams of a young child from all the way across the store. The screaming child in the cart and mom rolling her along passed my way (which, the child was not being abused or even touched), along with a woman giving them judgmental stares. I looked at the staring woman and said, “I feel so sorry for her. I’ve been there and gosh do I feel her pain.” You’d be glad to know that she snapped out of it. Goodness me, we’ve all had our kids break down, make a break for the dairy section (as our daughter did with my husband) and Lord knows, the folks at Acme know our child’s name. However, instead of being so yucky and judgmental about it, maybe she could have thought to, oh, OFFER SOME HELP?! That is something that though I have had tons of strangers stare at me while my child is doing the full hip carrying back bend as I have an arm load of groceries as well, but no one has offered any assistance. BE KIND PEOPLE! We’re just trying to parent here!
Bless that man’s heart…it is hard when UNREASONABLE children choose to be full-out unreasonable, especially when fun is supposed to be happenning.
And bless that cranky-pants lady, too. Perhaps she needed a chill pill :)
Love ya! Have a wonderful Thursday!
Holly
I share the opinion of Sex and the City’s Samantha:
Why is it that some restaurants prohibit cell phone use, but have no policies about tantrum-throwing children?
Let’s face it. Both are annoying.
I’m just sayin’.
If she was looking for relatively inexpensive coffee and breakfast while doing the crossword puzzles she’d be much better off a Dunkin Donuts. Yes, that place is full of sugar glazed fat pills but you don’t normally find kids in the dining room.
I get so bent out of shape over people like that! Get a grip!
Last week I was at the gym with my kids. I took them swimming. I couldn’t swim because it was that time of the month when I don’t go in public pools. Anyway, I was watching them between pages in my book. They were staying in one lane, not splashing or being louder than you have to be to be heard over the incredibly loud air system. But some lady decided that she just could not swim laps while kids were talking! Seriously! She went and complained because my kids were having to talk over the loud air, (you cannot hear the person standing right next to you if you don’t raise your voice) and they weren’t even screaming! Why can’t you swim laps if there is noise? How does that affect you on the other side of the pool?
I pay more for my gym membership than she does, by golly, and I am going to get my $78 a month value! If I have to pay twice as much as you do, get over yourself!
I do NOT let my kids go wild, I am a very, very strict mom, and I HATE noise with a passion. I know they were not being excessively loud.
I immediately knew I needed to pray for her. Because, you know, you can’t be mad at someone when you are praying for them. So I prayed God would bless her, soon, with 5 kids. OH, yes I did!
That story kind of hurt my heart for some reason. Two hungry little ones, the lure of a playground and a Dad out with his boys. I’m wondering what just a sympathetic smile or an offer of distraction for the boys from Crossword lady could have done for this rather brave Dad. Such a little effort would have reaped a pretty big payoff in that situation.
Crossword Lady needs to get herself a big ‘ol bottle of perscription Chill Pills.
Grumpy people are a thorn in my side – especially when it comes to dealing with children. Seriously – they are children and they will always act like it.
You preach it sister – go somewhere else for peace and quiet. That somewhere else will never be my house – I have children!
My SIL has a saying for kids who throw tantrums who don’t belong to her:
Ain’t my train, so I don’t hear the whistle.
Your story would have been REALLY good if it had ended with the tantrum child puking on the crossword.
We were about to take off on a half hour flight from Kauai to Oahu, and my two year old, who was obcessed with little einstiens, yelled “5,4,3,2,1 blastoff!” An old woman who was sitting across the isle from us leaned over and said “shut up!” to my two year old! He wasn’t throwing a fit. He was excited to be flying on an airplane! It’s a really good thing I was strapped into my seat. I was seething the entire flight. I was coming up with all kinds of nasty things to say to her, secretly hoping my child WOULD throw a huge fit. I was thinking to myself, for the love of pete, you are in HAWAII, relax! When she got off the plane she left behind a folder. I grabbed it and seriously contemplated keeping it so I could find her name and address and send her a nasty letter. But, I didn’t. I found her husband and gave it to him.
I just try to remember that God sees all and with the judgements that we judge, we will be judged also.
oooo, I cannot handle people who think they’re better than others…and apparantly there are a couple that read this blog! I think that there are great, well-meaning parents out there that do the best they can. Someone once told me that she thought she was the “best parent” even after 3 kids, because her kids never had meltdowns in public. She said “just as I was patting myself on the back, God gave me #4.” It’s very easy to be judgemental, even if you have kids, but people should remember that they have no idea what the circumstances are. I say BRAVO to that daddy taking his kids to McDonald’s. I don’t think he REWARDED his children by letting them stay, I think he made a good memory by spending time with his kids. Ok, I’m climbing off my soap box now, sorry.
“if motherhood has given me anything, it’s the ability to almost completely block out high-pitched screaming”
Now isn’t THAT the truth.
I absolutely love reading your blog, I’ve been keeping up on it for about two or three weeks now, but no matter what kind of day I’ve had, your posts really cheer me up and keep me smiling! Thanks so much, BooMama! :)
well, I’m about to become the Cruella Deville of this set of comments. Wasn’t anyone else raised in the country?(I’m talking Mayberry here, people) With a grandma and mamma who would have placed one spat on the bottom and said “we do not behave that way”. I totally agree that the Old Biddy shouldn’t have said anything, but there are some points here: In Free America you can dine where you choose. My elderly parents go to McD’s for the senior citizen discount and they love the biscuits. Should they not be allowed to go there just because they don’t like to play in the ball bath? Also, children, (and yes I have two, in their twenties), shouldn’t be allowed to act out in public places where they can distract others. They should be taught at an early age what is appropriate behavior in public. And discipline, its a good thing! Its spoken highly of in the Bible, as a matter of fact, recommended. If you just let a child “melt down” without consequences for their actions, they don’t learn that, guess what? There are consequences for your actions! The bigger you get, the worse the consequences! Sorry…my kids aren’t perfect either but they were disciplined when they misbehaved, and so far they have turned out ok.
MY MERCY we have a wide range of reactions here. Such funny stories – some OH-NO-HE-DIDN’T stories – and I think it’s so important to remember that if we all had the same opinions or the same reactions, 1) life wouldn’t be much fun and 2) we’d be a bunch of robots.
And selfishly I have to say that writing blog posts for robots wouldn’t be very much fun. Especially with robots’ inability to process emotions and all.
So feel free to agree or disagree – just please be kind to each other. Because I will twitch if you’re not kind to each other, and frankly I have plenty to twitch about in real life without the blawg making me twitch, too.
Gracias, internets. And, as always, rock on.
The older I get, the more experiences I have. the less I feel inclined to judge others… Even well disciplined children can surprise parents sometimes!
Way before I had kids, I heard a mom in the grocery store tell her child no. They were the next aisle over. It was also a very quiet time of day and apparently, nobody else was on the aisle because as soon as I rounded the corner, the child started throwing a tantrum. I looked at him and said, “Don’t do that for my benefit because I happen to agree with your mother.” He immediately turned off the waterworks. She mouthed a thank you to me and the child just sat there stunned that his plan didn’t work. ;-)
I live in the country and both of my boys have had the swat on the butt and that is not acceptible speech many times. But still they are kids, and boys at that. i do not expect perfection, and in the case of one throwing a tantrum in a place like that, well sorry but no I wouldnt punish both by leaving. I dont necessarily look at that as “giving in” because for all you know there was another punishment already in place.
For instance around our house behavior like that after I have driven all the way to town warrants a day without being able to ride thier 4 wheelers when they are at home.
We live 40 minutes from town. When we go to town we are going to get done what needs to get done even if it means I do it while dragging whiny children. I cant afford to truck back and forth in hopes of catching them in a good mood.
Steff
Umm…I think that woman needs a reality check! A library or maybe, say her own house, would be more appropriate for peace and quite than a fast food restaurant! Yikes.
My sympathies go to the father trying to care of his two small boys.
Rock on k. My thoughts exactly!
Oh, that poor daddy — here he was, doing a good thing, taking his kids out to breakfast and giving his wife time to do whatever she wanted to do … and seeing that his hands were way full, I think I would have gone over and lent a helping hand.
Or given him my own child, who at the very least, would have fallen on the floor and kicked both feet and arms right along with the other child. Because he IS the tempertantrum KING.
Word.
I LOVE this story and the sausage #1 one as well. You have a definite talent for writing. I visit often, but don’t comment much. You’re a HOOT!