One day a month or so ago Alex and I were in Publix, and completely out of the blue he asked me if he will go to heaven one day. Because I was a little distracted by the fact that at some point pot roasts have started to cost about the same as a cute pair of shoes from Target, I sort of off-handedly replied, “Well, yes, buddy, if you have asked Jesus into your heart, then yes, you will go to heaven.”
And then Alex got very quiet, and after about a full minute of Deep Soul Searching, he screamed “JEEEEEEEEEEEE-SUS! COME INTO MY HEART!” right there next to the pot roasts, only he said it not like he recognized his fallen heart’s need for a Savior but more like he was aggravated with Jesus for not sharing His toys.
So while I wasn’t completely sure that the little man was clear on some of the more fundamental doctrinal issues, I was entirely certain that Jesus had good reason to take issue with his tone.
But then, about five minutes later, when I was seized by TOE CRAMPS, of all things – toe cramps so severe that I could not imagine that my left foot would ever function properly again – I told the little man that I had to stop for a second before THE PAIN MADE MY KNEES BUCKLE, and he responded by saying, “Mama, I would like to tell a prayer for you.”
I said that would be wonderful, so we bowed our heads right there in front of the dairy case and he put his hand on my shoulder and said, “Dear God. Please help Mama’s toes to feel better in Publix so that she can wear her shoe. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.” And he was so deeply sincere about the whole thing that I wondered for a split second if his profession of faith over in the meat department wasn’t the real deal after all.
I’ll probably never know exactly what was going on in Alex’s heart and mind that day in the grocery store, but I do know that he’s been chock-full-o-curiosity ever since. So we’ve spent last few weeks talking through all sorts of four year-old questions about God, and while part of me thinks that four is too young for a child to have any real grasp of sin and sacrifice and atonement and resurrection, a much bigger part of me knows that there is no faith as simple and profound as the faith of a child.
I also know that this is the time to plant those seeds of faith and then water them as much as we possibly can so that the little man’s roots will grow deep, so that one day he will be able, as Paul wrote, “to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that [he] may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”
And so, we answer Alex’s questions. We talk about God. We talk about the joys of knowing Him, of serving Him, of trusting Him. We pray that he sees evidence of those joys as he watches his mama and daddy work out their faith every single day.
And it has been, quite simply, one of the sweetest times of my whole life.
Before Alex was born, I imagined that this child whose face I had not yet seen would sit with me at a desk while I carefully read passages of Scripture aloud. Everything would be Perfectly Orderly; I would Teach With Care while my child Listened Attentively. Then we would clasp our hands together and begin the walk toward faith with lockstep precision, only stopping long enough for him to surrender to whatever calling God might have on his life.
Because I wasn’t idealistic or anything.
But the reality, as anybody with a little one knows, is absolutely nothing like that. The daily process of teaching and leading a precious little heart is about as methodical as herding a room full of cats. And you know what else? It is hard. On every single level. So much of parenting uncovers our own imperfections, and we are constantly being humbled, broken and refined in our own lives while we try to nurture the little lives that have been entrusted to us. Did I mention that it’s hard?
There are days when I’m really disappointed in myself as a mother; I get so tired of struggling to balance the things I need to do with the things I want to do, and as a result of that I am confronted with the reality of my selfishness over and over again. It’s a mighty good thing indeed that I don’t have to parent in my own strength, because I’ll tell you right now that I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t last a day.
But the rewards of parenting? They really are huge. They’re immeasurable. They’re eternal. And the longer I’m a mama, the more I find that the most teachable moments in terms of faith don’t require much organization or planning on my part. They don’t necessarily happen while we’re sitting in a church service or when we’re Reviewing Memory Verses With Great Intention, though certainly I believe that God uses those things.
For me the most breathtaking moments – the times when D and I are both able to share our faith with the most sincerity and transparency – are when Alex picks up a maple leaf from the ground and then says, with wonder, “GOD MADE THIS!” Or when he runs into the house after being outside and says, “Mama! I missed you! And I talked to Jesus while I played!” Or when he’s sick with a stomach virus and says, through his tears, “Mama? Will you always take care of me? Will God always take care of me?”
Or even when he puts his hand on my shoulder in the middle of a crowded grocery store and prays for my toe cramps while we stand next to six different brands of sour cream.
In many ways motherhood is absolutely nothing like I imagined but so much more than I expected. And for me, right now, the greatest joy is sharing the Greatest Joy with a four year-old who may get a little cloudy on the theological details – but whose heart is wide open.
I cannot imagine any greater privilege.
This post was originally published on October 23, 2007.
I field so many questions about God and Jesus and the Holy Spit (I will correct him, one day). I love it when my son gets a very concerned look on his face when daddy is trying to get a handle on his gripping fear of spiders to eject one out of the house and says: “Be careful daddy, it’s one of God’s creatures. He won’t be happy if you mess it up!”
Wow great post! I enjoy it a lot! thanks for sharing!!!
God bless
There are days when I’m really disappointed in myself as a mother; I get so tired of struggling to balance the things I need to do with the things I want to do, and as a result of that I am confronted with the reality of my selfishness over and over again. It’s a mighty good thing indeed that I don’t have to parent in my own strength, because I’ll tell you right now that I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t last a day.
THIS. I never really got how much, how hourly, how desperately I needed God’s grace to function until I had children. And now I relearn it every day.
I just posted about this! It’s our job as parents to introduce our kids to Christ. The more we talk about God, the more is gonna remain with them!
That was the sweetest thing ever.
My 4 yr old said to me the other day “Mama, Jesus came into my room last night, and he stayed with me all night so I wouldn’t be afraid of the dark.” I just about got chills. And it is so wonderful that we have a God who is amazing, and I believe he was right there with her.
Thanks for sharing, and for letting me share.
I think it was a valid experience for him. As one of my friends once put it … “He gave as much of himself as he could give, to as much of Jesus as he could take”.
I was saved when I expressed fear of dying and my dad reminded me of what I’d heard in VBS .. that if you believe in Jesus, you go to heaven when you die. I recall the immense relief from a terrible burden that had crept into my mind. And other places I didn’t even know about.
I had to keep following the trail of bread crumbs, of course, but it was ALL His doing.
Sweet, sweet post.
AND … as I also heard once … raising kids is the process of praying that they will turn out ANYWAY.
That’s “ok, ANYWAY”.
I don’t know how you do it, Sophie, but EVERY DAY you make me laugh. And I read that silly post last year! STILL LAUGHING!
What a great post! I look forward to the day when my daughter and I can actually talk about these things. Right now we’re still in the stage of trying to corral her during our nightly Bible reading, and having her repeat after us for her simple bedtime prayer. I hope I’ll be ready for the questions when they come!
I just love this post! My 8-year-old proudly tells me that she asked Jesus into her heart while standing near the refrigerator. Maybe there’s something about chilled food and the Savior — some parable that only kids understand.
good stuff, sophie.
Thank you so much for this post! I have a 16-month-old little boy and another child on the way in about 6 weeks and we are already trying to plant those Veeeeerrry early seeds with our son by reading to him and letting him see us read and hear us pray together. To hear someone that is several years farther down the parenthood road say all that you said up there really helps me to see that I don’t have to PLAN and WORRY and STRESS about teaching him about God, but letting it happen and being a great example is the most important thing.
And P.S.–I went to MSU and love them DAWGS too!!!!!! :) From one Mississippi girl to another! :)
I love this post and I love that the Lord Jesus, through His incredible mercy and grace, DOES allow us to come to Him as a child…with simple faith…
That’s just cool.(no pun intended) Its so true that kids catch on to our everyday life. As they learn everything else from birth: they see, they hear, they imitate so include the little ones in prayer time and let them see you read the bible or read it to them. Some of that is just creating the environment of “this is just what we do in our house”, “we follow Jesus and its our way of life”. Deut 6:7 is so right when it says to impress Gods ways on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
What I hate is watching them imitate my weaknesses or failures. Ugh. So by the grace of God, I hope they turn out ok ANYWAY!
This is absolutely precious! I can’t wait to be a mama some day and be able to see my little one come to know the Lord. Oh, what a day that will be!
I can’t remember if I read this originally, but it doesn’t really matter. It ROCKED MY WORLD tonight. Thank you and thank you again.
Precious! I have a four year old boy who is in that very stage of faith right now (may it last forever!). He goes around asking me “Did God make this? Why did God make this shoe blue?” Or, when something is not working out the way he would like, “I wish God didn’t make this.” And out of the blue, he will throw his head back and *shout,* “GOD? ….GOD? …ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?” Faith like a child…
yes. that’s what it’s all about.
so sweet :)…. thanks for sharing the greatest love!
It’s great to hear Alex is catching on so early! I was saved when I was 4 1/2 years old, so I’m living proof that God calls people with unpredictable timing. :-)
I LOVE this post! As a mom of a 16-month-old, I get frustrated by my lack of displayed Christianity at times. I’m all ready to get down and discuss deep theological issues, but dealing with the day-to-day stuff in a Christlike manner is way beyond me!
“I am confronted with the reality of my selfishness over and over again.”
Amen!
“I am confronted with the reality of my selfishness over and over again.”
Amen! It is the reality of my selfishness that causes me most of the guilt I experience – and I pray everyday for help in making better choices. Loved the post!
I understand the struggle of not wanting to rush this major decision in your child’s life. We did the same, but both our girls asked Christ to come into their lives at age 3, after many questions and discussions. They are now 27 and 30 and still walking closely with God. When Alex does receive Christ, you may want to document it, so there is something he can refer to when he is older and wondering if his decision was really valid.
YEAH!!! You reposted my favorite post EVAH! I remember I wrote you a big ole email when you wrote this, about how amazing it was. Don’t know if I ever sent it or not. So if not, I will be happy to tell you again how incredible and inspiring and well-written and BEAUTIFUL it is.
My fifteen year old tells us that he got saved at a stoplight when he was four. I vaguely remember him asking about going to heaven and giving him the same response. He prayed out loud, like your little guy, and has declared since then his faith in Jesus… just sayin’ maybe it really happened and was a pivotal moment in his life. Not how I expected it for my son… I was picturing the aisle walk and kneeling prayer at the altar, but it didn’t happen. He was eventually baptized by his dad, a few years later, when we saw he understood it.
Thank you so much for this post. This is exactly what I’m going through right now and I wanted you to know that God used your thoughts to speak right to my heart and encourage me. I am just about to embark on a new journey as I begin homeschooling my daughter next month. Satan has been doing a work on me, making me doubt my influence on my girl and feuling the flames of self-condemnation. Thank you for reminding me that as long as I remain faithful to the Lord, He will continue to do a good work in me and He alone will give me strength for the journey! I also know that God uses every single seed (no matter how small) we plant in our children to draw them to Himself.
My 4 year old is stuck on Jesus on the Cross Mama!! He has BooBoos Mama!! Yes, God Put Jesus on the Cross so his BooBoos would be all better.
This is of course yelled at the top of his lungs every Sunday we go to Mass…and echos around the quiet church……..
beautiful sweet post.
My dd DNK asked Jesus into her heart and life back in February of this year. She was 7.5, and is very mature for her age. I think she really understands as much as she is able.
Now she’s asking about getting baptized, to show the world that she loves Jesus.
Yes girl, i totally understand your post and how wonderful it is to be a mommy. It’s a true blessing on so many levels!
this post was for the comfort of this new 9-month old mama who cried tonight out of exasperation for not always getting the holiness of this calling.. thanks Boo. I’ll hold on for my little man too.