I’m Going To Need A Bigger Refrigerator Door

11 July 2007 by

It’s no secret around these parts that I’m not a very crafty person.

Perhaps this is due in large part to the fact that I don’t do crafts at all.

Ever.

And unfortunately, my child has paid the price for my failures in the craft arena. He hasn’t had lots of exposure to things like, you know, scissors – which he wields as if his right hand has been seized by an electrical current – because, well, CRAFTY THINGS MAKE MAMA NERVOUS.

Plus, I don’t know if y’all know it or not, but art is oftentimes messy.

Over the last year or so, though, I’ve had a change of heart. It’s not that I like crafts now – OH, HEAVENS NO – but I do want for Alex to enjoy coloring and painting and lo, even pasting things. I also want for him to have memories of doing crafty things outside of church or Mother’s Day Out, perhaps even in the house where he lives with the mother who is crazy.

As an added bonus, the occasional crafty activity might just help Alex learn how to “hold a pencil” and “write some words” and other skills that will come in handy when he starts school.

So I have been trying to do better.

And lately, I feel like there’s been something resembling crafty progress in our family.

For starters, I bought a big canvas at Michael’s about a month ago, and one Saturday morning I covered the breakfast room table with a sheet and a bunch of newspaper, put out about 15 different colors of craft paint, and let Alex paint to his heart’s content. He mostly used a brush, but he also used his hands, and even though there is still a substantial chunk missing from the inside of my bottom lip, I didn’t try to control the mess.

The little man had a blast, and his finished masterpiece was one of D.’s Father’s Day presents.

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LOOK! A CRAFT! IN OUR HOUSE! BECAUSE WE MADE IT!

All in all, the missing chunk of lip was a small price to pay. The paint that missed the canvas came off the kitchen chairs fairly easily, though the sheet I draped across the table will never be used as a bed linen again. Unless I want to frighten my guests.

I’ve also discovered that while Alex doesn’t care for crayons, he LOVES HIM SOME MARKERS. It’s been raining here the last couple of afternoons, and just look at the results:

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MORE CRAFTS! IN OUR HOUSE! BECAUSE WE MADE THEM!

I draw the pictures – sometimes labeling them with what color should go where if he says he wants to “read colors” – and Alex works his magic with the markers. Then he colors some more. And then he asks if he can color ONE MORE TIME before he goes to bed.

Internets, I believe that’s what you would call a crafty victory. For both of us.

So if you’ll excuse me, the little man and I need to head to Walmart. They have Crayola markers for eighty eight cents a pack, and we crafty types like to pick up our supplies when they’re on sale.

I’m sure you understand.

Filed Under: Family Fun

I Feel That The Internet Needs To Know This

10 July 2007 by

Right now – right this very second – I am listening to Toby Mac on my iPod. For the first time.

Oh yes I am.

And here’s what’s even more surprising to me:

I AM ENJOYING IT.

Do y’all think that I might be, you know, street like that?

There is this one song called “Boomin’,” and it makes me want to get in my car and play it really loud and ride around a Sonic parking lot.

Which is TOTALLY acceptable behavior for a 30-something mama.

So.

Y’all wanna come with me?

I’ll buy us some tater tots with cheese.

And WE WILL ROCK IT, YO.

Filed Under: Rambling

Because I Love Me A Giveaway

9 July 2007 by

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Some of you book lovers might be interested in this bloggy book exchange over at Overwhelmed With Joy.

Also, Barb is giving away a set of Debbie Macomber’s books over at her place.

And while we’re on the subject of free stuff…I’ll have my own little giveaway to announce in the next day or two. And yes, you can rest assured that it has something to do with Monk & Neagle. Because I am nothing if not predictably obsessive.

Filed Under: Bloggity Fun

At Long Last, I Give You The Fried Green Tomatoes

9 July 2007 by

But first, I give you a picture of my sister-in-law Janie frying some sausage.

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No real reason for that. Other than the fact that so much pork product in one skillet made me a little giddy.

And yes. It’s true. I have no life at all.

None whatsoever.

So to make the fried green tomatoes like Janie does, you’ll need five ingredients:

5 green tomatoes, sliced about 1/4″ thick (unripened red tomatoes will work just fine if you don’t have the green variety in your neck of the woods)
1 cup Italian-style breadcrumbs
1 cup flour
4 eggs, beaten
1/4 cup olive oil (you may have to add a little more on your 2nd or 3rd batch)

By the way – you could certainly use bacon fat instead of olive oil. Of course, your heart might explode, but considering that I’m a person who JUST POSTED A PICTURE OF SOMEONE FRYING SAUSAGE, I really don’t think I’m in a position to be offering Helpful Hints for Coronary Health.

I’m just sayin’.

And now, a fried green tomatoes play-by-play.

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As you can see, Sister is providing critical culinary support as Janie slices the tomatoes. Certainly you will want to have a second person in the kitchen as you begin to slice the tomatoes, as it never hurts to have someone looking over your shoulder when sharp kitchen utensils are in use.

Unless the second person likes to scream at random intervals. In which case he or she is really no help at all to the person doing the cutting.

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Line up your flour, eggs and breadcrumbs near your stovetop.

IN A ROW, PEOPLE! IN A ROW!

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Then pour your olive oil into a large, hot skillet.

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While the oil is heating through, ask your sister to showcase all the lovely qualities of the skillet / cooking area.

This is also a nice time for the talent portion of the evening. I mean, if you’re into that. Or you can just move right on to evening gown. Totally up to you.

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And then, we dredge.

Make sure to put the tomato in the flour first, then egg, then breadcrumbs.

You also have the option of doing a second post-egg / pre-breadcrumb flour dredge, but Janie went with the one-flour-dredge option. And you can’t argue with perfection, people.

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This picture is what Paula Deen dreams of for every single one of us: a hot pan filled with a battered and fried vegetable. She’s built her entire career on this very premise, and I think she would be mighty proud of Janie’s work.

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After about five minutes, you’ll want to flip the tomatoes, and when see their progress, you’ll have no choice but to say, “OH YES MA’AM.”

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And here’s the first finished batch. Janie drizzles them with a little Vidalia onion blossom sauce, then tops the sauce with crumbled goat cheese.

I didn’t get a picture of the garnished tomatoes because I was too busy eating one right after another. Rapidly.

It’s some bonafide Southern goodness, y’all.

Filed Under: Cooking

In Which I Try To Remember How To Do This Thing They Call Blogging

8 July 2007 by

So I write things here?

Yes?

Is that how it goes?

Okay.

So.

We’ve been in Memphis for the last several days. We went to see my brother and his family, and because we’re a fun and kicky bunch, the weekend turned into sort of a mini-family reunion. Mama, Daddy and Sister were there (unfortunately, Sister’s hubby had to finish up a work project this weekend and oh, we did miss him), along with D., Alex, Brother, Janie, my two nephews and me.

We ate way too much, stayed up way too late, slept way too little and had a whole bunch of fun.

We had Extra Special Guests, too: Janie’s parents came over Friday night for burgers and the fried green tomatoes and sweet potato fries I mentioned in the previous post. Last night my aunt and uncle from Arkansas and my dear friend Bubba joined us, and my brother cooked approximately 364 pounds of ribs on the grill.

Surprisingly, it was more than plenty for the, you know, THIRTEEN OF US.

This morning D., Alex and I made a little detour on our way home so that we could go to church with some of our favorite people in the whole wide world, and I will even go so far as to specify that Emma Kate was one of those people, because it brings her great joy to see her name ON THE INTERNET. IN LIGHTS. RIGHT WHERE IT BELONGS.

I’ll be back in a little bit with some pictures. If I can manage to stay up past 8:30.

At this point I just can’t tell.

Filed Under: Rambling

I Took Some Lovely Pictures, But Unfortunately You Cannot See Them

6 July 2007 by

Oh, I photographed the fried green tomato extravaganza like nobody’s business.

Sister even got into the act and gave it her best Vanna – ever-so-elegantly directing your attention to the tomatoes, the olive oil, the whathaveyou.

She did not, however, wear a bugle-beaded cocktail dress. Though that certainly would have added a certain festive air to the proceedings.

And Janie, God love her, donned her cutest apron and put all the ingredients in adorable color-coordinated bowls and fried those tomatoes to a lovely golden brown – even garnished them with a tasty sauce and a little goat cheese.

But alas, I cannot show you.

Because I can’t figure out how to crop my pictures on Janie’s computer.

However, I can give you this little tip.

Take 6 sweet potatoes, peel them, slice them like French fries, put them in a Ziploc bag, and then cover them with a mixture of 4 Tbs. canola oil, 4 Tbs. taco seasoning, and 1/2 tsp. cayenne pepper.

Shake the Ziploc bag really good – then spread the potatoes on a couple of cookie sheets.

Bake at 425 for an hour – flipping the potatoes midway through.

DEEEEEE-licious.

And I’m off to bed now. With happy sweet potato / fried green tomato memories.

See y’all tomorrow.

Filed Under: Rambling
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