Well, Melanie has a new modem, and that means we’re feeling a little giddy with podcast power right now. Because we can talk without being disconnected! And without error messages popping up on our computers! And without becoming so frustrated that we vow and declare that we will NEVER USE THE INTERNET AGAIN, EVER, AND WE MEAN IT.

This week we talk about our inability to use our soft voices, The Bachelorette (oh, we are not pleased), our real and imagined ailments, our trip to Louisville, Friday Night Lights, Melanie’s quest to find an aqua shirt and many other DEEPLY RIVETING topics. Like, for instance, THE HEAT.

And by the way, there was a section about mid-way through where we got sidetracked and I had to cut it out, but then I couldn’t figure out a good way to transition between the two sections, so I did what any media professional would do and simply inserted three very loud growling sounds. That’s a sure sign that you’re dealing with some quality production values, my friends. We like to keep it HIGH TECH around here.

You can click here to listen. Or here. Or you can subscribe on iTunes if you’re feeling particularly fancy.

Have a great Thursday, y’all!

So I think it’s accurate to say that Melanie and I have experienced perplexing technical difficulties every single time we’ve tried to record a podcast this past year.

Now granted, we’ve only tried to record a podcast approximately THREE WHOLE TIMES, but still.

This past Saturday, however, we finally got ‘er done. There are a few little technical ish-ahs that crop up throughout the podcast, but everything ironed itself out eventually. Except for the part towards the end where Mel got disconnected and I sat there for a few seconds saying “Hello? HELLO? HEL-LOOOOO?”

Oh, believe you me: it’s all just as top-notch and first-rate as it sounds.

But for the most part the technology cooperates, and we talk about the end of the school year, health and beauty concerns (including Mel’s new dry-brushing technique that positively mystifies me), summer TV offerings and, of course, our hair.

You can click here to listen. Or here. Or you can subscribe on iTunes, but that’s quite a commitment for a podcast that’s as reliably unreliable as ours.

Happy Monday, y’all.
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BlogHer and Purina are learning about ProPlan Selects – click over to check it out!
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Edited to add: Seeing the news out of Joplin, Missouri this morning is absolutely heartbreaking. I don’t even have words. But I am praying.

Listen.

When I told y’all this past Monday that I had some plans for the week, I wasn’t kidding. I cleaned my house like crazy on Tuesday (well, half of it – I’m saving the bedrooms for tomorrow), and I was just tickled to pieces to get ‘er done. I have been on a little bit of a house-related roll ever since, mainly because I AM SO OBSESSIVE IT’S JUST PLAIN WRONG.

Anyway, I won’t bore you with the details, but this weekend my plans include cleaning out my laundry room and hanging curtains in my dining room. Then I plan to make my own yarn and crochet fourteen 3×5 throw rugs for the various high-traffic areas in my house while I simultaneously mix a non-toxic paint in a color I invented so that I can finish the extra room I built yesterday afternoon in time for our weekend company.

Or something like that.

And in all seriousness, this surge of productivity hasn’t just been limited to house stuff. Well, I mean, in terms of actually achieving something, I guess it has been limited to house stuff, but still. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. And having some thoughts. About some ideas.

Back in the summer Melanie and I vowed and swore and declared that we were going to record at least one podcast a week. We were even going to record it on Wednesdays. And we were going to record it straight through without stopping to share information that has no business on a podcast so that I wouldn’t have to do any of that tricky, time-consuming editing. And we were going to post the new podcast every Thursday and OH, WHAT A MARVELOUS PLAN IT WAS.

But as it turned out, our plans didn’t work out like we’d hoped. Because we recorded approximately zero podcasts over the course of the whole summer. So maybe we didn’t quite hit the mark in terms of our, you know, schedule.

(I don’t even have a good excuse.)

(You just have to understand that the thing about Melanie and me is that we’re not terribly motivated by goals. We just prefer to channel our energies into things that really matter, like making Fiesta floats out of shoe boxes and finding new and improved ways to organize our stovetops.)

However, over the last couple of weeks we’ve been talking a good bit about recording another podcast. Not a bunch of them. ONE of them. As a follow-up to the one we recorded back in May. Which was the first one we’d recorded in a year.

I think any broadcasting professional would tell you that our level of productivity and consistency really catapults us to the most mediocre level of all the sub-par podcasts out there. We take a certain amount of pride in that.

So. Let’s say that Mel and I sit down and record a podcast in the next two to four days (just so you know: THIS REALLY IS A PRIORITY, which is why I’m (sort of) committing to it in advance). Could you maybe give us a few ideas for some topics? Or maybe throw out some questions? Or suggest a non-political current event that might make for some fun podcast fodder?

(OH, who am I kidding? We’ll totally talk about a political current event – provided that you want us to focus on someone’s hair and wardrobe as opposed to his or her voting record and/or party affiliation.)

(WE’RE SO PROFESSIONAL.)

Thanks in advance, everybody. We’re mighty grateful for your help.

It’s been almost a year since Melanie and I recorded a podcast.

A YEAR.

I would tell you how totally lame we are, but really, you know that already. We’re not so much for the “planning” or the “execution.” We tend to “procrastinate” and “study our pores” and “watch Bravo” instead of sticking to any sort of podcasting schedule.

Hopefully, though, we cover a wide enough range of topics on this podcast to make up for our inconsistency. We talk about Jessica Simpson’s new perfume, some favorite new beauty products, a trip we’re taking with our kids, our issues with the SunChips bag and, of course, our hair.

Also, for reasons I cannot explain, there are a couple of places in the podcast where Mel and I sound like Crazy Eddie and Johnny Fever with The Wacky Breakfast Crew on Hot 103.3 FM’s Morning Show. I tried my best to tone down the reverb, but please remember and never, ever forget: I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing.

Our commitment to quality is inspiring, isn’t it?

You can click here to listen. Or here. Or you can subscribe on iTunes, but that’s probably too much trouble for a podcast that may or may not show up over the course of a calendar year.

Regardless, you have some options.

Thank you and have a lovely day.

Several weeks ago Melanie and I told Travis that we wanted to record a podcast so that we could listen to him squirm uncomfortably while we talked about how much we love (LOVE) his new CD. So we recorded a podcast a couple of weeks ago, and when I started to edit it I realized that I sounded like I was screaming into an empty room lined with tin. I’m sure it would have been a real podcasting gem if anyone could’ve tolerated ALL THE TINNY SHOUTING for more than about three seconds.

Anyway, we decided to record another one again last night, and the good news is that we seem to have resolved our sound issues. But the bad news is that we may be a little too comfortable with each other at this stage in the podcasting game because Travis watched a basketball game the whole time he was talking to us and then Melanie and I tried to do some singing.

Additional bad news: you’ll be subjected to all of those things if you listen.

However, the podcast does have a run-down of reality shows (including why Mel and I have jumped off the “Real Housewives” bandwagon for the New Jersey installment), a thorough analysis of our sleep issues, an outline of our summer TV plans and – believe it or not – a few behind-the-scenes stories about Travis’ CD.

So basically, you know, it’s our usual brand of random. Topped off with some sarcasm for good measure.

And we do hope you enjoy it.

Click here to listen. Or here. Whatever suits your fancy.

p.s. Just FYI: these are the sheets we talk about in the podcast. Travis’ wife Angela discovered them, and they are SWEET MINISTRY TO YOUR SLEEPING SOUL. Especially if you have a 20% off BBB coupon.

Sometimes Melanie and I decide to record a podcast because we want to talk about some specific things.

Today we recorded a podcast because I had been in the kitchen all day long and wanted to pursue some sort activity that didn’t require mixing a softened stick of butter with sugar. And Mel wanted to do something that wasn’t watching the same episode of “Friday Night Lights” for the third time in a row.

I’m telling you: sometimes boredom will just propel you into all manner of podcasting ambition.

Anyway, this one is completely random (SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW?). We talk about my search for a birthday gift for my sister-in-law, our mutual disdain for coconut, Mel’s hunt for a maxi-dress and how her shopping habits eerily resemble a woman I know who likes to sign cards and letters like this:

Love,
Mother
“Martie.”

It’s all very big fun.

As long as you remember that the words “very,” “big” and “fun” are completely relative.

And you can listen right here.

If the link isn’t working for you, you can also go here and then click on the speaker.