Oh sweet mercy this post by Big Mama made me laugh. But I probably should say “laught,” and you’ll understand why after you read her post.

Also, happy birthday to Diane!

Finally, I just ran across this video over at Tess’ blog, and all I can say is that I pray that I sit next to the groom one day in church. Or – even better – that I get to stand beside him in choir.

You know you’re in for a rough night when it’s 2:30 AM and you’re standing on your front porch in your pajamas, trying to get a barking dog to be quiet while a disturbed bird who has chosen to build a nest in the eaves of your porch flaps around your head like something out of a Hitchcock movie.

So last night wasn’t what I’d call restful. That’s all I’m saying.

However, the sight of me trying to stave off a confused bird in the middle of the night was probably pretty comical.

Just not to me at the time. Because I don’t know if I mentioned it, but it was 2:30 IN THE MORNING.

Anyway.

This past Saturday after Paige’s baby shower I went to see D’s mother and grandmother. Sissie fell asleep in her chair about five minutes after I got there, and Martha talked for the next hour and a half about how “Mother’s just doing remarkably well, it’s really remarkable, but I just can’t, you know I can’t, I mean I just can’t lift her up so I’ve gotten some help to come in the mornings and the evenings, well, you met Carol, she is just delightful and comes very highly recommended and do you know that she used to work at my beauty parlor? She did! She worked at my beauty parlor! And of course Mother can’t get to the beauty parlor right now but we are trying to keep her hair fixed, and somebody told me about this foam, this foam that you just squirt into your hair and then rub it with a towel? And it’s like washing your hair only you don’t have to use water because of course we can’t get Mother in the tub right now? Well I went to the Walmarts to find it, and I told the little girl who was working what I was looking for, but right when she started to look someone dropped this huge bottle of something and they had to have a clean up, the little girl who was working had to call for a clean up and I said, ‘Well, I’m really in a bit of a hurry, sugar – my time is limited,’ but she didn’t even hear me so I just left and I mean I’d love to find that foam but I just can’t run all over town from one drugstore to another drugstore to another looking for this shampoo that’s not really shampoo, and did I tell you that I’m thinking about getting my hardwood floors refinished?”

And that’s only five minutes’ worth. I would transcribe the rest, but then my fingers would fall off from All The Typing.

My absolute favorite moment of my visit was when Martha was talking about how Alex has such an enthusiastic personality and how some of her friends had suggested that he might have inherited her “social” gene. Martha went on to say that she found that hard to believe because “I mean, people tell me that I like to talk a lot, but you know me – I’m shy!”

Yes. Um, of course. Because shy people often, you know, introduce themselves to others in the middle of the Steinmart petites section to tell their fellow shoppers about the woes of shopping for jackets when one has very narrow shoulders. Shy people do that ALL THE TIME.

Yes ma’am.

We really did have a lovely visit. It made me wish y’all could meet her.

And in conclusion, I would like to say that if Martha is shy, then I am skinny.

As a rail.

This morning around 4 I was awakened by Much Screaming And Wailing On The Part Of The Child, so I jumped out of bed and ran to the stairs. Before I could get past the landing, Alex started walking down the stairs to me, arms outstretched, breath ragged, tears flowing, and all he could manage to say was, “Mama? I’m wet.”

Which is officially the World’s Greatest Understatement. I know because in between all the clothes changing and sheet changing I logged on to the interweb and typed in those very words and won the 2006 World’s Greatest Understatement Contest.

Okay. Maybe not.

But the child wasn’t kidding about the wet thing.

He was soaked from his neck to his toes, and I have no idea how so much fluid could come out of One So Small, but if measurements had been available, I feel quite certain it would have been a gallon’s worth. Plus or minus a quart.

So I pulled his clothes off of him, found some clean underwear and pajamas in the dryer, and then had to venture back upstairs to get his Froggy and Monkey who gratefully were spared the middle of the night baptism. Well, I guess technically they WERE baptized if they’re Methodist or Episcopalian, because they had definitely been sprinkled.

But the Baptists would never count that.

OH I kid because I’m exhausted. I know that stuffed animals can’t be baptized.

Especially not with tee-tee.

And then there’s that pesky business about how they don’t have a soul and all, so they’re not so big on the repentance thing.

Anyhoo.

I need to straighten up the house a bit before I hit the road and head to my cousin’s baby shower.

And, you know, get dressed.

Have a lovely Saturday.

These are THE BEST.

Delta Red Beans and Rice
from Southern Living

1 pound dried red beans
6 cups water
1 1/2 pounds smoked sausage, sliced (I use turkey Polska Keilbasa)
1/2 pound cooked ham, cubed
1 large sweet onion, chopped
2 garlic cloves, pressed
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 bunch green onions, chopped
1 cup chopped fresh parsley
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon dried oregano
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
1/8 teaspoon ground red pepper
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1/4 teaspoon hot sauce
Hot cooked rice

Place beans in a large Dutch oven. Cover with water 2 inches above beans; soak 8 hours. Drain.

Bring beans, 6 cups water, sausage, and ham to a boil in a Dutch oven. Cover, reduce heat, and simmer 3 hours.

Sauté onion and garlic in hot oil in a large skillet until tender. Add to bean mixture. Stir in green onions and next 9 ingredients. Cover and chill 8 hours.

Bring bean mixture to a simmer; cover and cook, stirring often, 1 hour. Serve over rice.

Makes 8 to 10 servings

Life has been a little on the crazy side lately. Good, but crazy. I may have mentioned that a time or nine.

To help combat the craziness, I’ve been listening to a certain song – the first one on Chris Tomlin’s new CD – every single morning this week, and it provides some much-needed perspective.

I was ever-so-delighted when I found video of CT singing the song on YouTube – mainly because now I can share it with y’all. He starts singing at about the 1:38 mark. And if you can play one of them thar gee-tars, Chris even teaches you how to play the song after he sings it.

There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring
And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing.

Alex and I are heading to my hometown tomorrow so that we can go to a baby shower for my cousin Paige, who is expecting her first little bundle of joy in about a month.

Those of you who have been reading here for awhile may remember that I got a bit, um, emotional when I found out that Paige was expecting, and while I don’t envy her swollen feet and legs right now, I’d give up just about anything – save my husband and my own child – to re-live the anticipation of that last month of pregnancy.

(However, if I did in fact re-live it, I would prefer to get some sleep this time around.)

Yesterday I called Mama to tell her that Alex and I were going to be spending the weekend with her and Daddy, and she mentioned how happy she would be to see the little man. She went on to tell me that it was supposed to be cooler this weekend and I needed to make sure to pack some long-sleeved shirts for Alex. I’m really glad she told me that because my original plans were to let him run around barefooted in his Spider Man underwear all weekend while dousing him with cold water.

The advice that Mama gave me yesterday made me laugh a little bit, but it also served as a reminder that the independent part of me likes to think that I would have figured out how to take care of Alex just fine if left to my own devices. And I probably would have done an okay job. But the reality is that I needed other people’s tips and words of wisdom when Alex was a baby. I still do – even though we’re on the back side of potty training and toddlerdom. There’s comfort, plain and simple, in knowing that you’re not alone, that you’re not crazy, and that you’re not going to ruin your child’s life if you can’t breastfeed for the first eighteen months.

There’s comfort, plain and simple, in fellowship with other mamas.

For me, in those first few weeks of Alex’s life, my sister-in-law Janie and my friend NK were lifelines. Janie realized – long before I did – that my milk wasn’t coming in like it probably should and that my young’un, he was HAWNGRY. NK had a baby who was six months older than Alex, and I think I mimicked her entire schedule for feedings and naps. But more than anything, they made me feel welcome in the strange new land of motherhood – and encouraged me when I felt like I didn’t know what I was doing. In those days where you’re only sleeping in three hour increments (at best) and wandering around in a daze a good bit of the time, that encouragement is huge.

Paige has so many firsts in front of her, and part of me just wants to hold her face in my hands and say, “Soak it up. Soak up every little bit. It will fly by and before you know it that little baby will be shaking you awake in the middle of the night just to tell you that he or she wants to eat for breakfast.” (I know whereof I speak on this one, because Alex woke me up this morning around 4:30 to tell me that he would like a donut, please, when it’s sunshine outside. I was ever-so-pleased to be awakened with a request of such urgency and importance.)

So will you do me a favor? If you have a memory of those first few weeks of motherhood that’s particularly special to you, would you share it in the comments? If there’s a tip that saved your sanity, would you pass it along? Once you’re all done, I’m going to send Paige the link so that she can focus – just for a little bit – on the joy that’s waiting for her about a month down the road.

Just for the record, here’s one of my sweetest memories: on my second night in the hospital, D left to get us some supper, and I sat in a chair with Alex in my lap. I was totally and completely overwhelmed by the gift of his life, by the sweetness of his face, by the way he already knew how to wrap his little hand around my finger. And I told him, even though he couldn’t understand my words, how much we loved him, how much God loved him, and how he was, without a doubt, the greatest blessing his daddy and I had ever known. I thought that I could never love anyone as much as I loved Alex in that moment.

But I was wrong.

Because three and half years later, I love him even more.