So tonight I was walking from the kitchen to the guest room – where I had big plans for folding clothes and watching the State/Vandy basketball game – and I realized that pretty much anytime I get ready to commit to the night’s TV viewing spot, I always take three things with me.

(And please notice how I very lovingly placed these three things on a throw before I took their picture. I wanted them to be comfortable.)

(After all, they’re family.)

1. Mississippi State stadium cup – because I like to have ice cubes in my presence at all times, and a stadium cup is the perfect size

2. Mentholatum – because I have a deep and abiding fear of needing to soothe my chapped lips but not having lip balm handy

3. My phone – because I find that reality shows and sporting events are infinitely more enjoyable when accompanied by some quality texting

What about y’all? Do you have any “comfort items” that you like to have at the ready when you’re watching TV? Or just stuff that you always take with you when you move from room to room? Or am I just strange?

You don’t have to tell me if it’s that last thing.

Really. You don’t. Promise.

The end.

A few years ago I felt completely overwhelmed by the toys in our house. And feeling overwhelmed by the toys made me feel overwhelmed by the pantry. And feeling overwhelmed by the pantry made me feel overwhelmed by the upstairs linen closet. And on and on it went, until I finally had a small, private nervous breakdown and cleaned out every single room / closet / cabinet in our house while I cried and wailed about ALL THE CHAOS and used old dustrags to wipe my tear-stained face.

Oh, it was an ugly time. But the results were marvelous.

At some point during my obsessive diligent cleaning-out process, I ran across FlyLady‘s how-to-keep-your-house-clean website. And while I don’t get the FlyLady emails anymore – mainly because I think 467 emails a day distract me more than they inspire me – I do remember a few of her tips, and I think about them all the time.

For example, FlyLady encourages her readers to wake up every morning and get dressed from head to toe, then put on lace-up shoes. It cracks me up that FlyLady specifies that we need to get dressed from “head to toe,” mainly because it makes me picture somebody putting on a shirt, looking at her bare legs, and then thinking, “Yep. I’m done. That’s enough clothes for the day.”

And as far as lace-up shoes are concerned – well, no. No thank you. Uggs? Yes. Flip-flops? Yes. Lace-up shoes? Not so much. Not first thing in the morning, at least. I need some time and some coffee before I’m ready to tie laces. I think it’s probably right and healthy for all of us to be well-familiar with our personal lacing terms and conditions.

Another FlyLady tip? Make sure you keep your kitchen sink clean. I actually really like this tip and try to use it every day. There’s something about a sink that looks clean and pretty that makes me not care quite as much about the crumbs around my kitchen table. The only downside is that I have a white porcelain sink at our current house – not a stainless sink like I had at the other one – and OH, I MISS THE SHINY. I try to make my white sink shine, but it is impossible. There’s always some drop of something that ruins the magic. So these days I pretty much just wipe it down and avert my eyes and pretend like it looks absolutely beautiful.

Amen.

The other FlyLady tip I remember is to set aside five minutes every night to straighten up the “hot zones” in your house. Hot zones are areas that tend to collect clutter, and during the major clean-out of a few years ago, we really only had one identifiable hot zone: the coffee table in the living room. At that point in time Alex wasn’t in school, there were no papers scattered around, and toys mainly hung out on the floor. I felt a little superior about our absence of noticeable clutter, in fact. Prided myself on how well we kept the mail and the random papers to a minimum.

Well.

This morning I was getting dressed (from head to toe! but still no laces!), and as I looked around the house with some coffee-fueled eyes, I started to feel a little frustrated by all the clutter. It seemed like there was paper everywhere I looked. And after seeing what was seriously the fifth stack-o-junk, I remembered FlyLady’s hot zones tip. I got a little tickled.

Because seriously?

We don’t just have zones that are hot.

Our zones are on FI-IRE.

And trust me when I tell you that those three pictures are just the tip of the proverbial FLAMING HOT ICEBERG.

So I’m going to clean now.

For the record, I don’t think I’ll ever finish.

Hold me.

Oh, people. I had such high hopes for this past weekend.

Our plan was to head to Nashville Friday afternoon, because for months – MONTHS, I tell you – our sweet friend Angela has been planning a surprise 40th birthday party for Travis. And not just any surprise party – an 80s surprise party. With costumes.

And even better? It worked out that Melanie was going to be able to fly in for the party. We were so tickled that we were going to be able to experience the 80s fashion Hall of Shame together, and oh, we did we ever plot and plan and Google to come up with the perfect party outfits. I really wanted to wear one of the Suzy Peacock romper dresses that I absolutely adored back in the late 80s (picture a bubble suit for grown-ups, then add cabbage rose floral fabric, lots of Battenburg lace and a handful of themed buttons), but unfortunately I gave all of them away about ten years ago when I realized that I no longer had any desire to dress like a toddler.

I can’t imagine what I was thinking when I got rid of them, because obviously there are many days when I’m getting ready to make a quick trip to the grocery store and wish with all my heart that I had a cute cabbage rose romper to throw on. It would be perfect with jelly sandals, lace gloves and a sassy tulle hairbow.

Anyway, given the absence of the Suzy Peacock dresses and the realization that any of the current 80s throwback fashions are designed for people whose waists are the size of my right knee, I finally decided that my 80s outfit was going to have to be something fairly simple. It all came together when I remembered my 80s love for a little product called puff paint – which you can actually still buy at Walmart – and as it turns out, one cheap sweatshirt + one package of pink Rit dye + 3 colors of puff paint = 80s MAGIC.

Is that not the most hideously delightful thing you’ve ever seen? And let me tell you: with a pair of tight-rolled jeans, some big hair and some bedazzled flats? SPECTACULAR.

David decided to go with more of a preppy look and wear two Polo shirts at once. He also attacked some old jeans with bleach and a cheese grater, and HELLO, 1988, WE’VE MISSED YOU SO.

I’m pretty sure I wore jeans with that exact wash when I moved into my freshman dorm. KLASSY.

So we were all geared up for the party, and early Friday morning I woke up and packed our suitcase and clapped my hands in anticipation. But not too long after I finished packing, I checked the Nashville weather and thought, “UH-OH – there’s trouble in them thar hills.” Then David told me that it might be too icy on the other side of the state line for us to travel, and I made a VERY informed remark about I was sure it would all be fine because the weather people are always saying things like “SEVERE WINTER STORM” and then it snows for two whole seconds and CLEARLY WE SHOULD NOT LET THEM STOP US.

But around mid-morning, after at least three different people emailed us about the bad road conditions (the word “treacherous” tends to get my attention), my Nashville friend Paige called and said that the weather really was too bad for out-of-town folks to make the trip. I was so bummed. And in the spirit of the party theme, I pondered throwing a VERY DRAMATIC little fit just like I would have done when I was a teenager.

In the end, though, no fits were thrown – and I didn’t slam my door and crank up the Phil Collins music, either, even though I TOTALLY THOUGHT ABOUT IT. There were, however, six or nineteen conversations between Melanie and me about how sad we were that we weren’t going to make it to the fiesta. She had banana clips for us to wear, for heaven’s sake. AND BLUE EYESHADOW. AND HOT PINK BEADS.

But alas, it wasn’t meant to be. And I guess the up side is that I have a smokin’ hot new sweatshirt to wear when I go to the grocery store. It’ll help fill the void left by that cabbage rose Suzy Peacock romper.

It’s a bit of a hollow victory, but I’ll take it.

Happy 40th, Trav!

1. the “30 Rock” theme song
2. hummus
3. Gain detergent
4. “the most dramatic rose ceremony ever”
5. singing in the car with the six year-old
6. “The Amazing Race”
7. the TJ Maxx near Sister’s house
8. funny texts
9. iTunes
10. Hummingbird Farms lavender lotion
11. lemons
12. epiphanies
13. great conversations
14. the smell of an Aveda store
15. the color turquoise
16. yoga pants
17. friends that feel like family
18. when the underdog wins
19. Paul Mitchell Tea Tree Oil shampoo
20. wisdom
21. a good scarf
22. the sound of my people laughing together
23. homemade pizza
24. comfortable silence
25. The Proposal

What about you?

My hair has been an endless source of frustration for me lately. It’s not really a cut issue or a color issue – though I could certainly use help in both of those areas, but we’ll save that discussion for another day when I have access to a licensed counseling professional who can help me Express My Hair-Related Feelings and Evaluate My Unreasonable Hair Expectations – it’s mostly a texture issue. I feel like my hair has gotten very fine and very flyaway and very no-I-will-not-behave-for-longer-than-ten-minutes-no-matter-how-much-hairspray-you-use.

Unfortunately, I cannot put my hair in time out.

But OH, IF I COULD.

Anyway, I’ve been frustrated by my hair’s general lack of purpose. It’s a weird length right now – longer than normal but not as long as I want it to be – and I don’t really know what to do with it while I’m waiting for it to (hopefully) reach its style destination. Drying it with the round brush just makes it super flat, and using Velcro rollers gives me spectacular results for a full 30 to 45 seconds.

So.

Yesterday I was in Walmart, and as I made my way to the hair spray aisle, an old friend caught my eye. And in a moment of inspiration or desperation – I’m not sure which – I picked up that old friend and threw it in my cart and $15 later, we’re BFFs again.

TOTAL. BFFs.

LYLAS!

This morning I used every single one of those hot rollers. Everysingleone. And after I took out the rollers and fixed my hair, it took me RIGHT BACK to 1988. Quite frankly the volume was unprecedented. All that was missing was an oversized (detachable) lace collar and some pastel Connie flats. And shoulder pads. And acid-washed jeans.

And Paul Mitchell Freeze-n-Shine.

This morning’s volume was so uncharacteristic that I felt a little bit like I needed to tame the curls before I went out in public. After all, I didn’t want people to feel like they’d been transported back in time to the set of “Designing Women.” But after I worked with it a little bit, I felt like the hot rollers really helped. My hair had way more body than it has the last few months, and it’s actually still a little bit curly right now. I don’t know what to make of this phenomenon.

And you know what else? I always think of the 80s as being a fairly tragic time for hair, but now I’m thinking that the 80s actually taught us some valuable hair lessons. I mean, obviously we’re supposed to discard the part of our 80s hair history where we wore banana clips that matched our outfits and teased our bangs into nests and tied large pieces of tulle into gigantor hairbows. But maybe – just maybe – it’s time for us to embrace our Hot Roller Heritage.

Maybe – just maybe – it’s time for us to admit that hot rollers can take us to places that round brushes cannot.

That’s a hard word, I know. But I speak the truth in love.

And regardless of your hair styling preferences, I hope with all my heart that today brings you big hair and big dreams.

Big hair and big dreams.

Amen.

Every once in awhile we’ll have a weekend where, at the end of it, I think, That was just what I needed. And this weekend was definitely one of those. I had dinner with friends Friday night, a whole day in pajamas Saturday, church with my family this morning, a post-lunch nap, some great talks/emails/texts with people I love to pieces, and two hours of Jack Bauer tonight.

(And speaking of Jack Bauer, I need a quick “24” aside to say the following:

1) What was up with Freddie Prinze’s accent? It troubled me. It was like Helen Hunt in “As Good As It Gets” – the accent sort of floated in and out with varying degrees of New Yorkness, and it was a total distraction.

2) If you’re a person who has just blown up a helicopter and is also a part of an assassination plot, I’m thinking that it’s probably not a great idea to have a conversation on your cell phone where you’re saying things like, “We took out the helicopter, but now we’ve got to kill Hassad” while you amble down the crowded streets of New York City. BECAUSE SOMEONE MIGHT OVERHEAR YOU.

3) Tonight was like CTU 2.0. And all those new kids tried to make it seem like Chloe and Jack were antiquated relics who didn’t know how to use a push-button phone, and I took offense to that, quite frankly.

4) When will Jack Bauer realize that any time he is supposed to personally escort someone to meet with government officials, the situation is always going to end in gunfire?

5) I realized about 30 minutes into the show that the actor playing President Hassad was the same guy who played the game show host in Slumdog Millionaire. It had been driving me crazy trying to figure out who he was, and once I had my a-ha moment, well, THE RELIEF WAS PALPABLE.

Okay. That’s all. As you were.)

Anyway, the only thing that would’ve made the weekend any better would have been if the founder of Popeye’s had come to my house and fried up some chicken, but then again, it might’ve been too much. No need for joy overload. Much better to pace myself.

I was thinking yesterday about how a whole day in pajamas is one of my most favorite things in the whole wide world. In fact, if I’m really in relaxation mode, I love to wake up, stay in my pajamas all day, then take a shower before bed and put on new pajamas. I can be very productive on a pajama day, mind you – yesterday I probably washed and folded 104 or 216 loads of laundry while we watched basketball and screamed at the TV like a bunch of hillbilly sports fans. But the pajamas are my way of saying I am not leaving the house today. I have no plans. I am easy-breezy and by the way, there must be no make-up products of any kind anywhere near my face.

Also: I am likely to nap at a moment’s notice.

However, I know that some people don’t like pajama days. Some people like to put on real clothes as soon as they get out of bed in the morning because they say that staying in pajamas makes them feel lazy. Why, some people even walk around their house wearing shoes that have laces and stuff. I personally only walk around my house in sock feet, flip flops or slippers because shoes with laces make me feel confined, but that is probably not at all a surprise since clearly I obviously enjoy as much elastic as possible when relaxation is top priority.

And I really do think that the bottom line for me is this: a relaxing day at home is heaven on earth to me, maybe even higher on the heaven on earth list than bacon. And that is saying something.

So now I’m wondering: are you a pajama day person or not? Would you willingly spend your whole day in pajamas if you didn’t have to leave your house? Or do you feel like you at least have to dress a little bit if you’re home – maybe throw on some jeans or some workout clothes?

And let’s go even deeper: if you don’t have to be anywhere during the day, are you going to put on make-up anyway?

OH, I am all about the hard-hitting questions. And I’ll be sitting here in my pajamas and no make-up whatsoever just waiting to hear what you have to say.