Queen Of The Castle

51nbtv46q8l_aa240_.jpgA couple of months ago I got an email from Lynne Bowen Walker, an author who has written a delightful book called Queen of the Castle. It’s such a fun book to read; it’s interactive and inspirational and practical and chatty and everything good…perfect reading for a mama on the go.

Well, today Lynne is starting a blog book tour, and I asked her if I could be the first stop on her tour, primarily because it was way easier for me to remember May 1st than any other date in May.

PRACTICAL AS ALWAYS, I AM.

Not to mention:

WINNING OVER THE AUTHORS OF AMERICA, ONE BLOG POST AT A TIME.

Ahem.

So I asked Lynne a few questions about her book, and she was kind enough to participate in my amateurish interviewing efforts, oh bless her heart:

What in the world made you decide to write a book? And once you decided to write one, how in the world did you find time to tackle it?

It was kind of accidental, really. I kept finding myself writing magazine articles, all on the topic of The Importance of Being a Homemaker. After about 20 or so, it finally dawned on me that homemaking was my passion, and that even though I’m not exactly gifted at it, maybe I should write a book encouraging other women who love their homes and families but could use a little help.

And the joy of being forgetful is that every time I pick up the book and read a little, I think, “Oh! What a good idea!” I clearly really really need to read this book myself.

As for finding time, I wrote it in short bits, while waiting for my kids to be done with Little League practice, while I was in the auditorium waiting for the band concert to start, that kind of thing. I ran into one of my son’s football coaches recently, and after learning that I wrote a book, he said, “Oh yeah, I always did see you waiting in the car reading or writing something!”

Where did you get all the great “words of the week” that you feature? And how did you decide what would go into each chapter?

I love to read, and a lot of the authors I read use really big words. So as I came across words I didn’t know, I looked them up, then put my favorites in Queen of the Castle along with the definitions. Now we can all use really big words. :)

Deciding on what to include in each chapter came about because I love magazines, so I looked at each chapter as three short magazine essays plus some practical sidebars. When I came across great quotes or recipes that seemed too good not to share, I threw those in, too.

At the end of each chapter I included a Bible verse and a prayer, because any wisdom I have on how to live life as a homemaker comes from the Bible, and any strength I have to carry out what I know comes from asking God for help.

I also included a “Chocolate Break” at the end of every month because a girl’s just gotta have her chocolate. Otherwise we get cranky.

What audience did you have in mind when you wrote this book?

I figured moms of little ones would be interested in reading books about how to get their kids to stop biting, and moms of older ones would be interested in reading about how to get their kids into a good college, so it was that middle stage of motherhood that I pictured as I wrote – the moms who were heavy into chauffeuring kids to soccer practice, and who spent most of their spare time in the laundry room trying to determine if that was blood on the shirt and how exactly it might have gotten there.

But I’ve been gratified to hear that women of all ages have enjoyed the book, especially those who are grandmas and even great-grandmas. I think Queen of the Castle kind of celebrates the job we do in raising our families, and women who’ve already done that job appreciate being recognized.

Would if offend you to know that I kept my copy in the, um, bathroom, and that’s where I would read it, a few pages at the time, because it’s QUIET IN THERE?

Not at all, I think it’s a perfect bathroom book! And many moms would be envious that you actually get some quiet time in there.

I’ve also heard that it’s a good right-before-bed book, when you can barely keep your eyes open but want just a few minutes of reading time before dropping off to sleep.

There are so many great quotes and great recipes in your book – as I read, I thought that you must have been collecting both for years. Did you? Or did you accumulate them all as you wrote?

I did collect them for years. And I wrote the book over a period of years, too. So while it was at times frustrating to make such slow progress on writing the book, I think in the end it made it richer than it would have been had I been able to knock it out quickly.

What’s the best way for someone to order a copy of your book – and to make sure that they have it in time for Mother’s Day? (It’s a perfect Mother’s Day gift, you know.)

Thank you for the blatant plug, Boomama! Christianbook.com and Amazon.com both carry it, and I think they can ship pretty fast. Also, some Christian bookstores and Borders and Barnes and Noble stores carry it, so if you need a copy right away you might give your local bookstore a call to see if they have it.

*****

Just for the record, I don’t believe I’ve ever been referred to as The Queen Of The Castle.

But The Queen of Fried Chicken? You betcha.

It’s a title I wear with pride.

And I’ll never relinquish my throne.

Fashion Victim

A few weeks ago I realized that I needed something to wear to a dinner at a friend’s house. And there was no doubt that it was going to be The Best Dinner Party Evir because it was a girls-only event.

In other words: NO BOYZ WER ALLOWED BECUZ BOYZ HAVE COOTIES and because they do not enjoy talking about shoes, make-up, or Sarah Jessica Parker’s hair, all of which are Guaranteed Hot Topics wherever two or more females are gathered. Them’s the rules.

Anyway, when I started trying to find something to wear and realized that my closet was sorely lacking, I went to the Steinmarts and brought home a few shirts to try. In my head, I wanted to find something that looked sort of like this:

Except, of course, I would never – NEVER – belt something um, there, because I’ve got a whole lot more going on above and below the belt than the model does.

Plus, you know, I’M TWO OF HER.

Anyhoo.

I decided that I would try on the shirts and let D. tell me which one he liked best BECAUSE I AM STUPID, THAT’S WHY and the first shirt I put on looked similar to this next one:

D.’s reaction was something along the lines of “That shirt? Really? Are you sure?”         

So it was immediately out of the running.

The next shirt was my favorite, and it resembled the picture below – sort of a Japanese-style print, with a black fabric band instead of some pesky skinny belt. Granted, the neckline begged for a camisole underneath, but I could live with that. I also loved how it looked with some pants I’d bought, and I was feeling pretty sassy when I walked in the living room to show it to D.

D.: “Do you like it? Because if you like it, that’s all that matters.”         

Me: “I really do like it. But you don’t?”

D. “Well. It’s, um, interesting. But if you like it you should absolutely get it!”

Me: “But you don’t like it?”

D. “I’m not sure I understand it.”

Me: “Well, if you didn’t know me and you saw me wearing this shirt, what would you think?”

[LONGEST. PAUSE. EVER.]

D. “I would probably think that you were wearing a uniform from some sort of Asian Hooters.”

So that one was out. I’m pretty quirky clothes-wise, but there are several looks I try to avoid, and I would venture to say that “Hooters uniform” is fairly near the top of that list.

In the end, I settled on a shirt that resembles this one:

The one I bought is black and white instead of multi-colored…but it’s very flow-y and spring-y and billow-y and comfortable-y as can be.

Perhaps because it does not touch my body at any point other than the shoulders.

But the best part of all? You would never see me wearing it and suspect that I had on a Hooters uniform. From Asia or any other continent, for that matter.

So that’s a bit of a fashion victory, isn’t it?

We just won’t talk about the fact that you might see me wearing the cute, flowy shirt and wonder whether or not I was pregnant.

Which, really, is what every girl dreams of when she’s buying new clothes.

Prayer For Heather

Kelli has details about how we can pray for Heather’s surgery here.

Thought y’all might like to know.

Click To Claim Your Fabulous Prizes

As most of you know, Chris at Notes from the Trenches was so moved by your outpouring of love for Heather that she decided to round up some donations and give away prizes to the people who contributed to the love offering.

And as a result of Chris’ efforts, we have us some winners, ladies and gentlemen. Be sure to click over to see if you’re one of the lucky ones – and to thank all the people who gave of their talents so selflessly.

Which reminds me.

A couple of days ago I talked to Heather for the first time since she’s been at Mayo. She mentioned over and over again how very appreciative and humbled her family is because of everything y’all have done (almost EIGHTEEN THOUSAND DOLLARS, y’all – that’s Ephesians 3:20 in action).

Because you have been so unbelievably generous, Heather’s parents and Emma Grace will be able to be with them this week. Because you have been so unbelievably generous, her husband will be able to stay with her for the duration of her time at Mayo. Because you have been so unbelievably generous, they will be able to live without financial worry while they’re in Minnesota for the next four or five weeks – they can focus on what really matters, which is, of course, Heather’s health.

That’s huge, y’all.

So thank you to everybody again – to Jada for setting the For Heather thing in motion, to Beth for organizing the giveway for people who helped to get the word out about what we were trying to do, to Chris for putting together this latest raffle, and to every single one of you who have prayed or donated or encouraged. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: y’all really are the best internets ever, and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

Finally, Heather’s surgery is this Thursday – the National Day of Prayer, no less. Kelli’s going to be organizing a prayer chain at her blog, and once I have more details – in the next day or so – I’ll pass along the info.

Hope y’all have a wonderful week!

It’ll Take A Few Days To Process It All

We are in Mississippi, here to celebrate Sissie’s 97th birthday.

Say it with me, slowly: NINETY SEVEN YEARS YOUNG.

And then: ROCK ON, SISSIE. ROCK ON.

D., Alex and I drove over here today, but we didn’t get on the road until around 10:30 because we had a meeting at home this morning. The plan was that D. would drop Alex and me off at Martha’s house, then go out to the nursing home and pick up Sissie for her birthday lunch.

Well, when he got to the nursing home a little after 1:00, Sissie was none too pleased. She had parked her wheelchair by the front door BECAUSE SHE WAS READY TO GO, and when D. walked in, she said, “WELL, I’VE JUST BEEN SITTING HERE, WAITING FOR YOU.”

So D. tried to smooth everything over by explaining that it wasn’t too far past 1, that we were running a little late, and before he could finish his sentence Sissie sighed, rolled her eyes, and said, “IT’S ONE-OH-NINE!”

Obviously, she has really mellowed with age.

Once D. and Sissie arrived at the house, we all sat down to enjoy the lunch that Martha had prepared: baked chicken, meatloaf, creamed potatoes, potato casserole (if one kind of potatoes is good, then two is certainly better), apricot salad, butterbeans, English peas, rolls, birthday cake, caramel cake, strawberry cake and sweet tea.

So basically, you know, sugar and meat.

After we ate lunch and opened presents and RECOVERED FROM THE SUGAR COMA, Martha couldn’t wait to show me a skirt she bought yesterday. And she got so excited when she pulled the skirt out of her closet that she also pulled out the jacket! that she plans to wear! with the skirt! to church tomorrow! because you know the sanctuary just gets cold! it gets so cold! and hold on! look at the shirt that goes underneath the jacket!

And then she draped it all across the foot of the bed as if the bedspread were a mannequin, and she gazed upon her new outfit with love, and she was proud.

I thought for a moment that she was going to embrace me out of sheer happiness in the midst of the tender fashion moment that we’d shared.

But then her friend Mary Ann rang the doorbell and the moment was over because Martha really needed to explain to Mary Ann that even though she didn’t make it to Miss Veda’s funeral this morning, she did make it to visitation at the funeral home last night, because really, between Sissie’s birthday and the children coming for lunch and trying to set the table and baking the caramel cake and having to run to the Walmarts and looking for flowers for the beds in the back of the house because she really wants purple and gold flowers, but do you know how hard that is because they just don’t have ANYTHING in those colors right now, not anything, and the yard man told her that the ferns back there were dead, so she had him rip them out and throw them away, but then she heard that the ferns probably would have come back, but there’s just nothing she can do! nothing she can do! they’re gone! so there was just no way that she could have made it to the funeral, but she did go to the visitation, she did.

Also, this is completely unrelated, but Martha and Sissie don’t eat pizza because they say it tastes like perfume.

And I just wanted you to know that.

This Is A Public Service Announcement

Attention, Men of The World:

Want to woo your wife?

This is how you do it, my friends.

And consider yourselves warned, ladies: you will go weak in the knees.

And you will swoon.

And you will want to write something beautiful for someone you love.

I just had to share.