In the midst of all the Shred-type unpleasantness in my neck of the woods, I thought I would take a few minutes to focus on some products that I’ve recently tried and loved. As an added bonus, these things do not cause my muscles to spasm uncontrollably, so basically, you know, SCORE.

And I apologize in advance for another post that’s numbered. But this is a busy week, which means that numbering is my friend.

I do hope you understand.

1. So a couple of weeks ago when I was catching up on “The Hills” (I wish I could take back the first part of this sentence, but I cannot because it is true. Please don’t judge me.), I kept seeing commercials for a certain type of mascara. And since I am forever on a quest for the best inexpensive mascara in the universe, I knew that I had to try the new mascara when it was time to restock the make-up bag.

Last week I bought the mascara, which is called Cover Girl Exact Eyelights. I adore it. The coverage is great, it doesn’t clump, and it stays on all day long. Plus, I think the fact that it’s tinted (to compliment your eye color) as opposed to a straight-on Joan Jett black (as far as I know, Joan Jett has never had a signature mascara color, but I’m trying to be descriptive, you understand) makes it great for spring and summer.

Don’t ask me why I feel that mascara should be less heavy in the spring and summer. I have no idea, honestly. It’s just a gut cosmetic-related feeling.

By the way and FYI: Exact Eyelights is on sale right now at The CVS.

2. Here’s another new product that I adore: L’Oreal Infallible lip gloss in Petal. I got it as part of a Buy One, Get One Free deal at The Walgreens, and it’s my new favorite thing in the world. It doesn’t cake or flake off, and it doesn’t taste weird, either (I have Definite Issues when lip products come anywhere close to having a flavor).

3. I am a girl who loves me some slippers. Sister gave me a pair of UGGs about four years ago, and I have worn them within an inch of their ever-livin’ life. But in the summertime, the UGGs are too warm for me, so I end up wearing flipflops around the house and treating them like make-believe house shoes. However, it’s just not the same. Flipflops don’t have any of the smushy goodness of the UGGs.

Well.

This past weekend my friend Melanie gave me a pair of these slippers, and OH SWEET MERCY AT THE SUMMERTIME COMFORT. You get the coziness of the UGG with the functionality of the flipflop. They are a kicky delight.

4. And speaking of the flipflop – I am currently on a quest for the perfect black flipflop. I prefer a wedge and/or platform, and I was a huge fan of the SODA black flipflop until the only place I could find them was on websites that look like they were created in MS-DOS back in 1992.

So do any of y’all have any flipflop suggestions? I definitely don’t want to spend a bunch of money, but you should probably know that I like a little height on my flipflop heel because I find that when I wear a two-inch (or more) flipflop heel to the pool I am often mistaken for Heidi Klum.

That last sentence is totally true except for the fact that I have never been mistaken for Heidi Klum in my whole life ever.

But anyway, a nice heel on my flipflop makes me feel a little sassier, and if I’m going to have to sit at a pool all day long with other mamas who are cute and, you know, FIT, then I’ll take my sassy where I can find it, thankyouverymuch. Because I’ll tell you right now that the poolside sassiness is not going to come from anywhere other than my feet.

Unless you count my mascara and my lip gloss. And maybe if I wear my new slippers.

The end.

1) I didn’t blog about “The Office” Thursday night because I watched the Compassion bloggers on Mogulus instead. When I finally saw “The Office” it was after 11, and I think we all know that my brain is not terribly operational at that hour. And then Friday I went out of town for the weekend and I just got home and it seems sort of silly to do an “Office” post at this late stage in the game.

But I will say this: Meredith? And her dress? SWEET MERCY.

Also, Michael busting through that sign with the question mark on it pretty much made my week.

2) I have a giveaway coming up Wednesday, and while I can’t tell you exactly what it is yet, I can tell you that it involves a whole lot of Amy Grant goodness.

I KNOW!

3) Please keep the Compassion bloggers in your prayers. They’re all home safe and sound now, but this week will be rough as they try to straighten out their sleep schedules AND as they figure out what their “new normal” is going to be.

4) After Day 2 of “30 Day Shred” I seriously could not walk without making a spectacle of myself. Last Wednesday afternoon Alex and I were walking into Target, and when I tried to speed up a little bit so we could get out of the way of traffic, my knees buckled. Twice. But after Day 3, I really did start to feel sort of normal again.

However, I am sad to report that I have not lost 40 pounds in the last six days, so CLEARLY THE ENTIRE REGIMEN IS FLAWED.

– I have been working like crazy to catch up on all the TV I missed when I was in Nashville. It is a grueling task, but I am committed. Right now I’m taking a little break because I thought I’d better get something to drink. Because I find that when watching excessive amounts of television, it’s always wise to stay well-hydrated. It helps with the leg cramps.

– This next sentence will only make sense to you if you’re watching “24,” and if you’re not watching “24” feel free to skip to the next thing, but I just need to say this: Y’all, I cannot believe that Tony Almeda. THE NERVE.

– I do have a picture of Amy Grant from the ASCAP dinner, but I haven’t gotten it uploaded yet. The picture doesn’t show off her hair in its full glory, but it will definitely give you the general idea. Also: I did not take the picture because I was too afraid to talk to her. However, we did make eye contact very briefly and I smiled. THAT WAS THE BEST I COULD DO, Y’ALL.

– And speaking of the ASCAP Awards, I have another post or two that I’ll put up sometime very soon when the DVR is no longer demanding so much of my attention.

– Earlier this afternoon I was talking to Annie, and she told me that she and her family were about to go eat at a restaurant that serves fried green beans as an appetizer.

“Well,” I replied, “I’m going to need to hear more about this.”

Apparently this restaurant takes whole, cooked green beans, batters them, and then slaps them in a deep fryer until they’re golden and crispy.

I don’t know when I’ve ever been more intrigued by a fried food that I’ve not yet experienced.

So Annie told me she’d send me a picture from the restaurant, and as my mama would say, IT CAME THROUGH ON THE EMAIL just a few minutes ago.

Have y’all ever heard of such?

I have forty four posts in my drafts folder. FORTY FOUR. Forty four posts where I’ve had an idea but really never got going with it, or posts that I’ve started but not finished, or posts that I’ve finished but not posted. And whenever I have a little bout of writer’s block, which seems to be the case today because I stayed up way too late watching “House Hunters International” when I should have been sleeping, I think, “Well, I’ll just pull something out of the drafts folder.”

But it doesn’t work like that. Because all that stuff in the drafts folder? IS OLD.

I’m telling you: that drafts folder is like a crutch that collapses on you every single time you try to use it and therefore leaves you hobbling on your wobbly, broke-down ankle. Which is to say: WORTHLESS.

So today I’ve decided that I’m going to drag some of that stuff out to play, and I’m going to drag it out in a manner that leaves it completely devoid of any relevant context whatsoever. And THEN I AM DELETING THAT JUNK FROM THE DRAFTS FOLDER SO THE EMPTY WORDS WILL STOP HAUNTING ME WITH THEIR USELESSNESS.

Here are the first three. All totally unfinished. But I am releasing them into the interweb so that they can fly away and be free.

And perhaps find some sort of ending.

So I went to the bookstore to get Alex something like The Children’s Bible (which is what I had from the time I was 6 until I was 11 or 12), and my word it seemed like every single Bible in the kids’ section had some sort of theme. The Discovery Bible! The Veggie Tales Bible! The Adventure Bible! A Bible with a cover that looks like armor!

So I bought The Adventure Bible(!) because it’s for early readers and it was on sale, but the more I’ve thought about it the more I’ve decided that the whole themed Bible extravaganza may be just a wee bit out of control. I mean, at the rate we’re going, it won’t be any time at all before we have The High School Musical Bible! Or The Hannah Montana Bible!

Or maybe we could even have a Self-Affirming Bible with A MIRROR INSIDE – that way we can watch ourselves as we read God’s Word aloud and then feel really good about how holy we look.

Sorry. My sarcastic side took over for a minute. I do apologize.

My friend Daphne told me watch “30 Rock” after she saw the very first episode. She said it was the funniest show on television. But I am sometimes stubborn and inflexible (NOOOOOOO.) (YESSSSSSS.) and told her that I did not have room for another TV show in my life what with all the “Top Chef” and “Project Runway” (HEY MR. SEAL! IT’S YOUR WIFE!) and “Amazing Race” episodes that keep our DVR filled to overflowing.

But lo and behold, I finally watched an episode about halfway through last season and thought it was funny. Then I caught up on some of the older episodes. And y’all? Daphne was so right. “30 Rock” is hilarous. HILARIOUS.

So I just want to go on the record: Daph, you were right. I was wrong. You are a TV maven.

When we were in Uganda our group went to a lodge in the middle of nowhere for a couple of days at the end of our trip so that we could debrief and decompress. We ate all of our meals outside on a covered deck (WHAT UP, NATURE), and the last morning we were there I woke up super-early, took my Bible and my journal out on that deck, and sat there for a really long time.

The view from the covered deck was stunning. It was lush, tropical – green in every direction. And that morning, as I looked out over the Nile and reflected on the week we’d spent in Uganda, I decided that I never wanted to forget the scene in front of me. I felt broken and tired and worn-down, and for a few minutes it did my heart a world of good just to see something pretty. In retrospect it’s interesting to me that I completely missed the stuff in the background that wasn’t quite as healthy, but I guess I just wanted to focus on something beautiful.

I guess I just wanted to focus on something that had everything it needed to thrive.

A few hours later our group met on the banks of the Nile for Holy Communion. And while the area where we gathered was visible from the place I’d been sitting earlier in the morning, it looked entirely different once I was standing in the middle of the clearing. It wasn’t nearly as lush – and I’m pretty sure that the tree behind us was dead – but as we stood in a circle and worshipped together, I realized that the picture-perfect view I enjoyed earlier in the morning had absolutely nothing on our Communion spot. In fact, I was standing in the best vantage point I’d had all week.

Yes, I could see the Nile, and yes, I could see the sweet faces of the people who had become so dear to me in such a short period of time. But more than anything, I could see this tree. And it just seemed right, somehow.

Truth be told, this tree probably characterizes my experiences in Uganda way better than the lush view I’d enjoyed earlier in the morning. It was weathered and prickly – pretty much the opposite of lush. It was stripped down. But in one little section, there was a cluster of new growth.

Happy weekend, everybody!

This morning I needed to be at church a little earlier than usual, so I gave the little guy the option of leaving the house when I did or leaving with his daddy about an hour later. He decided to leave with me. Which means he had to get out of bed at sunrise o’clock so we could leave the house around sunrise thirty.

And I tell you all of that so that you understand why he is why he is half-asleep in the one picture I took of him today.

Bless him.

So when Alex and I were on the way to church I said, “You know what? I bet you anything that when we get to church Mr. Mike will meet us at the door, and I bet he will have made some coffee.” Mr. Mike is a sweet man who serves so faithfully, and I am here to tell you that I had barely parked my car before Mr. Mike opened the door and gave the little guy a high-five.

IT MADE ME SO HAPPY.

Sure enough, Mr. Mike been at church making coffee since 5 AM. I bet he’d filled up at least 20 big carafes. I was so glad that the little guy got to see Mr. Mike in action, because I have the sweetest memories of growing up in my home church and knowing that certain people could always be counted on to take care of certain tasks – like how Mr. Fountain would always stand at the back of the sanctuary and add up how many people were there. Or how Miss Kitty always led the children’s choir. Or how Mr. McElroy always cooked the barbecue for the fall festival. I could go on and on.

So this is all a very roundabout way of saying that we had a mighty joyful Resurrection Sunday. Our little family got to serve together and worship together, and after we got home I climbed in the bed in the guest room, turned on HGTV, and promptly fell asleep for two hours. It was GLORIOUS. Then I woke up and walked in the kitchen and fixed a diet Coke over ice that was so delicious I nearly wept.

It’s the little things, you know.

In conclusion comma I would like to tell you that I made PW’s apple dumplings yesterday, and they’re ALL GONE tonight. ALL GONE. Because WE ATE THEM ALL. And I don’t want to overstate their deliciousness, but they’re pretty much life-changing. And simple. And inexpensive.

I think we can agree that’s a fairly winning combination.