It’s All Coming Back To Me Now

28 September 2010 by

When I was a little girl, I loved to play in my mama’s make-up. I’d sit in front of her magnifying mirror and put on eye shadow, rouge, powder, lipstick – and then I’d take all of it off with her Merle Norman cleansing cream. I have vivid memories of all of Mama’s make-up brushes and compacts and skin creams, mainly because practicing Seventeen magazine’s easy eye-shadow tricks with the mini-Merle Norman store in Mama’s room was one of my favorite things on earth.

Plus, all that frosted baby blue and leaf green eye shadow wasn’t going to apply itself, now was it?

This past Saturday the little man and I made an unexpected trip to Merle Norman with Sister because she needed to buy some of her beloved loose powder before we walked over to TJ Maxx. I hadn’t been in a Merle Norman store in about ten or fifteen years, but I am here to tell you that as soon as I stepped through the door, it was SENSORY MEMORY OVERLOAD. It took me about five seconds to get my bearings, and then I made a beeline for the display case of powder base and said, “Alex! Come here! This is the smell of Mama’s childhood!”

What? You don’t walk into a cosmetics store and then enthusiastically ask your child to smell a container of foundation?

Well, you have no idea what you’re missing.

And let me tell you: that powder base took me RIGHT BACK to 1983. Before I knew it I was singing Duran Duran songs and tying a big lace sash around my head.

Before we left I saw a bunch of other products I hadn’t thought of in years: cleansers, toners, masks – you name it. I saw the cream that Mama used to slather on her face every night before bed and could instantly remember how it smelled. I’m telling you: I was flooded with memories. And just as we were about to leave, I looked over at the check-out counter and saw these:

OH SWEET MERCY THE LIPSTICK SAMPLES. I can’t tell you how many times I pulled out Mama’s gold lip brush (it was retractable! and fancy!) and opened up one of those little blister packs. In fact, I had so many of them (thanks to sweet Miss Sara, the lady who owned the Merle Norman in my hometown) that I probably didn’t own a real tube of lipstick for the first two years after I started wearing make-up. I’d forgotten all about them until Saturday, but as soon as I saw them I remembered how much I used to adore them. And I told myself right then and there that the next time I need some make-up, I’m going to go to my local Merle Norman store.

Because if I buy some powder? THEY’LL GIVE ME FREE LIPSTICK SAMPLES.

The thrill of free never dies, does it?

What about y’all? What products or smells stir up all sorts of happy childhood memories for you?

If you’d asked me last week, I’d have said “Mentholatum” in a New York minute. With Dial soap, Mama’s White Rain hairspray and a big ole jar of Noxzema as distant runners-up.

But no kidding: Merle Norman totally trumped the Mentholatum.

That is no small feat, my friends.

Filed Under: Family Fun

There Was Fall Weather, And There Was Also 24-12

26 September 2010 by

The little man and I went to Nashville to see Sister this past weekend. The drive from Birmingham to Nashville is my ALL-TIME FAVORITE EVER, so I was a wee bit giddy when we hit the road Friday afternoon and I knew that I was going to spend the next three-ish hours heading north on I-65. It was the first time we’d been to Nashville since March, I think, and we were way overdue for a visit. NASHVILLE, WE’D MISSED YOU TERRIBLY.

Some of y’all may remember that Sister and B had to tear the first floor of their house down to studs after the Nashville flood this past spring. They lost everything that was downstairs (with the exception of a few keepsakes they managed to move upstairs before they evacuated), and they just moved back into their house a few days ago. The new and improved first floor is absolutely beautiful – and now it needs furniture.

I don’t know exactly how many hours we spent looking at rugs and tables and chairs and accessories this past weekend, but WE PUT IN SOME TIME. We found some gorgeous rugs at super-reasonable prices (Home Goods, I adore you), along with some great-looking dining room chairs on sale (World Market, big hugs to you, too). Sister has a good sense of what sort of look she’s going for, and I took some “before” pictures this weekend so that I can show you how everything comes together over the next few months. I think it’s going to be classic and eclectic and modern and fun. In other words: very Sister-y.

As an added bonus to our weekend, the MSU/Georgia game was on TV Saturday night, and we had a blast screaming for our Bulldogs. OH MY WORD WE HOLLERED. You probably heard us. We spent most of the first half screaming, “WHY CAN’T WE TACKLE?” and most of the 4th quarter yelling, “WE GOT A FIRST DOWN! WE GOT A FIRST DOWN!” Since our husbands weren’t there with us, they were spared the spectacle of us screaming at the TV like a couple of real-live contenders in a hillbilly ‘coon-callin’ contest. Not there’s any such contest, of course. But if there were, I think we’d bring a lot to the ‘coon-callin’ table – what with the sophisticated tenor of our understated elegance.

As I’m sure you can imagine.

Anyway, Alex and I got home tonight, and I’m already planning a return trip. Because when you leave Home Goods with the car looking like this –

– at some point you’ve got to figure out where all that stuff is gonna go.

By the way, when we were in TJ Maxx I saw a pair of boots that I thought were really cute, and I took a picture of them so I could show them to Melanie.

On a whim I turned over one of the boots so I could check out the price, thinking that they were so pretty that they probably cost $80 or $100.

Well.

You’d better know that I dropped that boot like a hot potato. Because EIGHT HUNDRED DOLLARS?

Since when did TJ Maxx get so fancy?

And who pays $800 for boots?

And if you pay $800 for boots, do you actually walk in them? Or do you put them behind a glass case and admire them from afar, LEST YOU SCRATCH THE PRETTY LODEN GREEN LEATHER?

Obviously I have some questions.

How was your weekend?

Filed Under: Family Fun

What The Ibex And I Have In Common

2 September 2010 by

Last night we were eating supper when I realized that I had COMPLETELY dropped the ball for something that was going on today. The sad part is that this is something that I’ve helped organize for years, and even two days ago I would’ve told you that I could pull off the whole shebang in my sleep. Only apparently that would’ve been a lie. Because I forgot to take care of two critical steps in the process. Which means that I can’t even pull off said activity when awake.

Anyway, after supper I made a phone call so that I could head off any potential early morning confusion, and I figured out a way that I could take care of everything I was supposed to do and still get the little man to school on time. It meant that we were going to have to leave the house pretty early, but that wasn’t a big deal since Alex views any early-morning activity as a WIDE OPEN ADVENTURE FILLED WITH EXCITING POSSIBILITIES.

Much like his mama.

(I can totally see you rolling your eyes at me right now.)

Given my disdain for really early mornings, I decided that I would go to sleep super-early so that I could maybe act like a human when the alarm went off at 5. I know I’ve mentioned it an annoying number of times before, but my preferred schedule (in a world with no responsibilities) would be to stay up until 2 or 3 in the morning and then sleep until 9 or 10. Everysingleday. Why? BECAUSE I AM DEEPLY MATURE.

So at 8:30 last night I got in the bed. My plan was to watch a wee bit of TV, become very, very drowsy, sleep the sleep of angels until the alarm went off at 5, then wake up by stretching very gently and serenading my family with a medley of Disney theme songs. While a bird rested happily on my shoulder.

I dozed off around 9:15 but woke up about 5 minutes later because I heard the TV in the den. Dozed off again – then woke up when D let the dog outside. Tossed and turned and turned and tossed. Finally decided to watch “Top Chef.” Dozed off – then woke up when D let the dog back inside. Dozed off – then woke up because of the aforementioned dog’s INCESSANT PAW LICKING (I’m convinced the dog was wearing a microphone). Didn’t fall asleep until 1 – then woke up at 2 when a certain 7 year-old took a roundabout route to the bathroom that involved turning on about sixteen different lights. Dozed off. Woke up at 2:12 because the 7 year-old couldn’t find his pillow. Got up. Found the pillow ON THE SIDE OF THE BED. Tried to go back to sleep. Except that I was burning up. Got out of bed again and turned down the thermostat. Wondered how a little nighttime peace can be so hard to come by in a house THAT ONLY HAS THREE PEOPLE IN IT.

My alarm went off at 5, and I was just as tickled and delighted as you might imagine after my two or maybe even three and a half hours of sleep. Not a Disney medley in sight. If a bird had been nearby I would have swatted it. I managed to shower and get myself ready, and then I tried with everything in me to be cheerful when I told Alex that it was time for him to get up. He hopped out of bed, put on his clothes, brushed his teeth and was ready to roll in no time at all. I’d promised him a donut for breakfast since we were leaving the house so early, and he was all about it. Happy as a clam. At 6:05 in the morning.

We made it through the Starbucks drive-thru without incident – I would even say happily – but by the time we got to where I needed to be to do the stuff I was supposed to do, I was beyond frustrated. I was frustrated with myself for dropping the ball, and I was frustrated by all the NOT SLEEPING I did last night. Every little thing was just on my nerves, and after Alex was the lucky recipient of a couple of my on-edge responses, he said, “Mama, I feel like you’re being a little hard on me.”

My heart sunk. So I apologized, explained that I was tired and a little frustrated, and Alex said, “Well, Mama, it hurts my feelings when you use your exhausted voice with me and when I’m trying my best and you’re still hard on me.”

Since when did seven year-olds get so articulate? Has he been minoring in counseling when I wasn’t looking?

By that time I was finished with what I needed to do, and as we walked back to the room where we’d left our stuff, I reached for his little hand. He’d have none of it. He crossed his arms and walked behind me. I knew that he was upset – because Mr. Relational typically has two moods: 1) happy and 2) really happy. He doesn’t spend a whole lot of time in the angry zone. So I gave him some space and tried to pull my mood out of the gutter. We walked in silence.

A few minutes later I started to gather our stuff without saying a word. As we were getting ready to walk outside, I remembered a YouTube clip that I watched yesterday. And since I knew it would make him laugh and hopefully lighten his mood, I said, “Hold on, buddy – I want to show you something.”

Oh, my child laughed. He laughed and he laughed and he held his sides and he laughed some more. And as I watched the giggles overtake him, one very sobering thought popped into my head:

OH MY WORD – I’VE BEEN THE WILD GOAT THIS MORNING.

It’s the great paradox of motherhood, really: some days you’re the good-natured Disney heroine, and some days you’re a hissing, bleh-ing mess.

Fortunately, the funny video broke the ice and helped us mend our morning. The little man threw his arms around my neck and nuzzled his head into my shoulder. We smiled. And as we were walking out to the parking lot, he grabbed my hand.

Or my hoof, as it were.

Here’s to a better tomorrow.

Filed Under: Family Fun, Oh Howard

It Was, Quite Simply, A Revelation

22 August 2010 by

About a month ago a new restaurant opened here in Birmingham.

Yes, Texans. I just heard you squeal.

And listen. We couldn’t wait to try the Chuy’s. I feel like I’ve heard people talking about the Chuy-liciousness (GET IT?) for a sweet forever, and I originally had every intention of being there opening weekend and knocking on the door until they let me in and agreed to pour cheese dip into a glass so that I could drink it through a straw.

But things have been a little cuckoo around here with our various and sundry end-of-summer funtime activities, and our inaugural trip to Chuy’s kept getting pushed farther down the list. But this past Friday night we agreed that Chuy’s was a must-do for Saturday lunch, and then we held a solemn candlelight ceremony so that we could affirm our love for homemade tortillas and really good pico de gallo.

Or maybe we just fell asleep watching TV. Regardless, it was a terribly exciting evening.

So Saturday morning we pulled into a parking spot at Chuy’s at 10:55 IN THE A.M. because we wanted to beat the crowd. And it’s a good thing that we did, because I’ll have you know that by 11:20 that place was packed.

I’ll also have you know that by 11:20, we were in the midst of a serious Tex-Mex blessing.

Because oh my goodness. The salsa. And the jalapeno ranch. And the deluxe tomatillo sauce. And the everything. It was just. divine. And the little man was so fascinated by the tortilla-making that was going on next to our table that the sweet ladies behind the counter gave him his own little piece of tortilla dough.

Sorry for the glare. But I wanted to capture the fact that the tortilla dough seemed to make him thoughtful. Analytical. Consumed by tortilla-related possibilities.

We had a great lunch, and I’m sure we’ll go back an embarrassing number of times. Because in addition to the food being great, there are two other decided benefits to Chuy’s: 1) it’s next door to Charming Charlie, and 2) OH MY WORD THE VIEW.

I’m actually considering moving to Chuy’s patio this fall. Just so I can sit there all day long and look at the pretty leaves.

Welcome to Birmingham, Chuy’s.

We’re mighty glad you’re here.

Filed Under: Family Fun

Come Here For All Your Empty Carb Needs

2 August 2010 by

I wasn’t kidding about overdoing it on the chips and crackers.

Oh, it looks harmless enough at first. A few two-liters of Cokes, some Veggie Sticks, a bag of tortilla chips, an economy-sized Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

But as you work your way up the shelves, you start to notice a the abundance of All The Chips & Such.

What you can’t see are the new Lay’s Tangy Carolina Barbecue chips – have y’all tried them? They sneak up on you with their tastiness. Because at first I was all, “I don’t really think I like these,” and then within five minutes I had developed a WHITE HOT CRAVING for that chip and that chip only.

Imagine that you cross a regular barbecue chip with a salt & vinegar chip. That is the tangy barbecue chip. And oh, it is tasty.

And by the way, that’s a bag of Peppercorn Ranch Sun Chips on the bottom right. It’s on the edge of the shelf so that it doesn’t make quite as much racket when you’re reaching for something else.

I LOATHE THE SUN CHIPS BAGS.

And finally, our cracker collection.

The Chex Mix, mini-Nutter Butters and mini-Oreos are behind all of the crackers. We think it’s better to keep the more nutritional offerings – like, you know, Nilla Wafers – front and center so that we can make smart food choices.

But in our defense, we have really cut back on our Cheez-It consumption this year. And please make sure you notice that Paige’s Cheese Nips are reduced fat.

Or as we like to call them: health food.

Filed Under: Family Fun, Travel

The Chlorine Has Sapped My Sense

2 August 2010 by

I don’t really think there’s any point pretending that I can string words into sentences right now. I have passed regular tired and arrived at silly tired. And that is why, at the pool tonight, my cousin Paige and I were hysterical talking about all the acrobatic maneuvers we used to perform in the water when we were kids. And then we even tried a few of them. You can imagine how delighted I am to tell you that Paige can still do a mean handstand with a lightning-fast scissor split.

And I may or may not still be able to do a super-awesome back flip. It all just depends on whether or not my back cramps mid-way through and I have to abandon the flip for more of a twist-type effect.

Oddly enough this was not a problem that I faced when I was 11.

Anyway, this week is our annual Cousins’ Beach Trip. Today was Day One. We got here at 4 this afternoon, and we left the pool at 10:45 tonight.

And while I can’t say for sure that I’m at an all-time end-of-summer high in terms of being completely dried out by chlorine, I’m prone to think that I am since it took approximately 1/2 cup of Eucerin to get my skin feeling even remotely moisturized after my post-pool shower. I also think that my hair has passed the point of no return. There is no amount of conditioner that can revitalize its texture. I think I just need to get it cut really short and then scatter it in some sort of wagon and then tell the kids we’re going on a hayride.

Or perhaps I could use it for mulch considering that it currently has the consistency of pine straw.

But beauty issues aside, I am just tickled to be here. This is always such a fun week for our family, and this year is going to be better than ever because even more of the family is joining the fun. Wacky hijinks are sure to be had by all.

There is also a very large quantity of snack food that is sure to be enjoyed by all. I am tempted to show you a picture of what’s in our cabinets right now, but I’d be way too embarrassed. Apparently this is the year when we decided we’d err on the side of ridiculous in the “chips and crackers” category. You won’t find a whole lot of protein in this condo right now unless it’s in the form of peanut butter or string cheese.

But you will definitely find four different kinds of potato chips, cheese balls, Whales, Triscuits (two kinds), tortilla chips, Chex Mix, pita chips, pretzel sticks and Sun Chips. And if we break into the Sun Chips, HEAVEN KNOWS you’ll hear us – that new bag leaves no Sun Chip snacking unpunished. Sweet mercy it’s noisy.

So that’s all that’s going on here. Some loud, happy children and some tired, happy grown-ups. Lots of potential for overloading on empty carbs. And – my favorite – a whole bunch of laughter.

Have a great Monday, y’all.

Filed Under: Family Fun, Travel
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